Honey, Would You Marry Again?

[JonPaine]

:yup: Wanted to share this from my email...

Would You Marry Again?

A husband and wife were lying in bed together one night. The wife rolled over and placed her hand lovingly on the chest of her husband.

"Honey," the wife said, "if I died would you get married again?"

The husband said, "Never, my dear."

The wife said, "I''m sure you would."

So the husband said, "Okay, I would"

"Would you let her sleep in our bed?" the wife asked.

And the husband replied, "I suppose so."

Then the wife asked, "Would you let her wear my clothes?"

"I doubt she''d want to," the husband said. "She''d be so much thinner."

[quiet bear]

Why does it have to be the woman? Why couldn't it be the man who is overweight?

just curious.

[biochemgirl]

Because it's less acceptable for women to be overweight.

Anyway, perhaps she is thinking the same thing about him :giggle:

[inland wave]

Uhmm....to be serious though, Dingfod says no, but I do see him getting back with his high school girl friend if something were to happen to me. And yes, I am okay with that. He may not remarry, but he would most certainly have a significant other, I don't want him to be alone.
If something were to happen to him. I would be single for a long time. It would be hard to replace the best thing that ever happened to me.

[biochemgirl]

We had this conversation when we were finalizing Malloch's will, etc. before he deployed.

I think it's so incredibly hard to even put myself in that situation, but I know I would want him to do whatever would make him happy and he would want the same for me.

[lisarea]

Anyway, perhaps she is thinking the same thing about him :giggle:

Oh, what a horrible thing to say! Women just don't think like that, or judge the quality of their partners based on something as inconsequential as their weight.

She is probably thinking, "We'd have to get the crotch let out to accommodate his massive schlong."

[Shelli]

:laughdie:

[biochemgirl]

:giggle:

You're right, she'd probably be more likely to think that ;)

[godfry n. glad]

Let's see if I can remember this...

Men remarry if their marriage was good, and don't if their marriage was bad. Women do the opposite. Men remarry based upon their positive experience, and want to repeat it, while women with a positive experience tend to idealize their lost spouse as unmatchable and not remarry. Women remarry based upon a forlorn hope; the hope that the next one will be better than the previous.

During her hospice, my darling wife told me (no, she didn't ask, she ordered) that I should remarry. And, as soon as I could manage it. She felt I was a "couple person" who did better in a relationship, I was "housebroken", and I needed the nagging to live longer. She did warn me that I'd have to give up my unrealistic ideals of what my future mate might look like....no more "Meg Ryan's younger and cuter sister" for me.

And... If you want to be accurate about the contrary scenario, the woman should say, "no, your clothes aren't tailored silk."

[Shelli]

Women remarry based upon a forlorn hope; the hope that the next one will be better than the previous.huh... and all this time I thought I remarried in order to be able to put him on my health insurance so that our medical bills wouldn't be through the roof anymore. How silly of me to be so practical. :doh:

:ptht:

ETA: As a matter of fact, if it hadn't been for that reason, I wouldn't have remarried again because the last one was so much fun.. not.

* Shelli thinks of generalizations she can post about men for godfry :giggle:

[godfry n. glad]

Women remarry based upon a forlorn hope; the hope that the next one will be better than the previous.huh... and all this time I thought I remarried in order to be able to put him on my health insurance so that our medical bills wouldn't be through the roof anymore. How silly of me to be so practical. :doh:

:ptht:

ETA: As a matter of fact, if it hadn't been for that reason, I wouldn't have remarried again because the last one was so much fun.. not.

* Shelli thinks of generalizations she can post about men for godfry :giggle:


See? You remarried upon the hope that this one would be better than the last. Right? :wink:

This one hasn't emptied the bank account, run up the credit card indebtedness, and/or taken out multiple sizeable life insurance accounts on you, has he?

[Shelli]

This one hasn't emptied the bank account..Nope. The last one didn't either. :unnope:


run up the credit card indebtedness... Yep, matter of fact, he has, but so have I. :dunno:


...and/or taken out multiple sizeable life insurance accounts on you, has he?Actually, I took out a life insurance policy on him. :wink:

[quiet bear]

Hmmm...once I marry, then I might have an opinion on remarrying.

[wildernesse]

My parents are always on the lookout for my dad's second wife. Yes, I said my parents and they are still happily married. My mom's requirement is that she must be fat. My dad says that's from making lemon meringue pies everyday, like he likes. I think she has many more characteristics than that, but I try to keep their silliness separate from my own.

[quiet bear]

What's it like, being married?

I lived with a woman once, for about a year and a half. I had one bottle of shampoo and one bar of soap. She had, like 17 of them. Half of them written in French. She had lotions and creams and scrub things for her elbows.

I'd hear it if I used the 'company towels', which to me made no sense to have them out unless company was coming over.

I'd also get skinned for drinking milk straight out of the jug. Never mind that she hated milk, and only I drank it.

Is it like that, being married?

[Ensign Steve]

Yes, being married is exactly like a 1970's standup comedy routine.

Or is it sitcom?

[Veritas]

Women have more than one bottle of shampoo because after a while you don't feel the effect of it on your hair any more. One brand makes your hair shiny, another makes it manageable, etc. Conditioner; I've heard a lot of men ask what it's for. Shampoo cleans, conditioner softens. Men tend not to need it, as they usually have short hair (or no hair).

"Company towels," are usually for people who "Just drop by." I hate people who drop by.

Milk straight out of the jug? Well if no-one else is using it, I don't see the problem. I suppose some women think it looks common.

See, you just have to ask and you'll find a woman willing to explain these things. Next time you live with one of us weird creatures, choose one who's laid back.

If she asks, "Does my bum look big in this?" - leave. You can't win when a woman asks you a question like that. She's clearly a neurotic arse-fixated nutter.

[quiet bear]

70's routine? I actually lived that. LOL.

I've used Head and Shoulders for 20 years or better. You fnd something thatworks, stick with it. It doesn't make my hair shiny or manageable or anything. It makes it 'clean'. LOL. That's what I'm aiming for.

As far as living with 'one of you creatures', I think I'd be good at it now. I have lots of places I can hide.

[godfry n. glad]

What's it like, being married?

I lived with a woman once, for about a year and a half. I had one bottle of shampoo and one bar of soap. She had, like 17 of them. Half of them written in French. She had lotions and creams and scrub things for her elbows.

I'd hear it if I used the 'company towels', which to me made no sense to have them out unless company was coming over.

I'd also get skinned for drinking milk straight out of the jug. Never mind that she hated milk, and only I drank it.

Is it like that, being married?

Yes.

It's obvious that you are not yet "housebroken". For me, the acid test was remembering to put the toilet seat down after I'd used the toilet. Of course, I got my retribution when I found that when she used the car, she'd pull the seat right up close to the steering wheel, so that when I tried to get in, it became an exercise in contortionism. I hit her with the "quid pro quo" and when she left the car seat in it's crippling configuration, I'd confront her with my best "whipped dog" look and ask, "So...Am I being punished for having left the toilet seat up?" (Since I usually hadn't, it was pretty effective.)

She also had a tendency to be secretive about her purchases, particularly shoe and purse purchases (even though it was her money to do with as she pleased) and would purchase them, bring them home and stow them in a closet for two to six months. Then, when she'd wear them and I'd inevitably point out that he was wearing a new pair of shoes (or purse), she could respond by telling me that "she'd had them for months."

We also used to have a "Bickersons" routine that we'd do for our friends, slamming each other about our respective idiosyncracies. We thought it was hilarious. Most of our friends did, too, but occasionally acquaintances would be scandalized.

My eighteen years of marriage were the most wonderful and enjoyable time of my more'n fifty years on this planet.

[quiet bear]

Companionship is, I think, the most valuable aspect of a marriage. I mean, after all the love, trust, compromise, and all that stuff.

Having someone just be around seems like it would be nice.

My problem is, whatif they want to be around, and I want my three feet of space? Sometimes I go days without talking. I wouldn't wish that on someone. Plus, there's always the inevitable 'what's wrong?', when in reality, there is nothing wrong, I just don't have anything to say.

It'd be unfair of me to expect someone to just leave me alone when I want to be by myself.

I was seeing an old friend for a few months, and it started to look like we might actually get to the toothbrush stage. But, it didn't work out, and after the fact, I found myself wondering how I would have handled having to share my thoughts with someone. It's an obligation I don't know I am prepared to meet.

[Angakuk]

Alternate version of the joke:
He: Would you marry again?
She: In minute.
He: Really? Would let him sleep in our bed?
She: Yup.
He: Would you let him wear my clothes?
She: Yup.
He: Would you even let him smoke my pipes?
She: Nope. He doesn't smoke.

[Kyuss Apollo]

At first I thought this was going to be a "would you remarry after divorce?" thread.

Was gonna say, "Been there, done that" but turns out it's a "if the better half croaks, would you remarry?" thread. That's different.

My wife tells me that when I die she is going to have me stuffed, so she can have sex with me whenever she wants to. Failing that, she just wants to preserve my penis. I have told her that the state probably won't let her do that, there may even be a law. :shrug:

Other times we have talked about what would happen to the kids...we are a pasted together family, and if something happened to me. my son's psychotic mother (she's BPD, BDD, OCD, alcoholic) would probably try to horn in on the picture for inheritance $ etc etc even though she hasn't bothered with him, not even a telephone call, in almost 2 years. Same with my wife's kids' father--he is only slightly a better picture of mental health.

Been thinking about visiting my attorney friend to find out what we can and cannot do about all that with our wills and re-do the deeds--the way it is now if something happened to either of us it could get pretty ugly with those other people I mentioned, cuz the kids would inherit 50% of it all each side but as they are still minors then...I don't know--that's why we need to talk to a lawyer.

To answer the question, I don't know if I would ever remarry. I don't think I would, but I never thought I would remarry again after I got divorced...

You just never know until you are in the situation.

[godfry n. glad]

Well, I found that it helped me to have someone to confide in...and I know it helped her, too. She told me as much.

I was lucky in that I finally found a woman who was not intimidated by my brusque and straightforward nature. That's because she was pretty direct herself.

Early on in our relationship, I made it clear that there were a few things I'd run into in earlier relationships that needed to be known:

1. I cannot read minds.
2. I cannot foretell the future.
3. I do not take clues well and I don't like mindgames.
4. I can be pretty blunt.

This led to our being pretty frank with each other. Open dialog was always the accepted process for us, although I'm sure we each had our secrets that we kept from each other. We didn't need to talk all the time...indeed, we didn't. She spent a great deal of time knitting or spinning, when she rarely spoke to me, even if I was in the same room. I read a lot, so it worked out quite well. We just liked each other in the same space...it was comfortable.

[seebs]

I probably would. I suspect my spouse would, although it might take a while. My spouse would, finances willing, probably do it as a gay guy instead of a straight girl, though, to avoid potential misunderstandings.

[Shelli]

What's it like, being married?For me, it's no different than living with someone except that now I don't have ridiculous medical bills to pay since he went on my health insurance.



I lived with a woman once, for about a year and a half. I had one bottle of shampoo and one bar of soap. She had, like 17 of them. Half of them written in French. She had lotions and creams and scrub things for her elbows.That seems excessive to me, but then, I'm the practical sort and often told that I'm not the norm for my gender.



I'd hear it if I used the 'company towels', which to me made no sense to have them out unless company was coming over.I'd have to have company first. :giggle: Even then though, nah, I'd just make sure that the normal towel for use was clean.



I'd also get skinned for drinking milk straight out of the jug. Never mind that she hated milk, and only I drank it.heh, I do that too but it's a soymilk container that I drink from and I couldn't care less if he drinks straight from the cowmilk jug either. Why would I? I'm not drinking it, so it doesn't affect me.



Is it like that, being marriedWell, not for me it's not, but again, I'm not the norm from what I understand.

[Dingfod]

I'd hear it if I used the 'company towels', which to me made no sense to have them out unless company was coming over.

I'd also get skinned for drinking milk straight out of the jug. Never mind that she hated milk, and only I drank it. Who was this woman, Hyacinth Bucket?

As far as living with 'one of you creatures', I think I'd be good at it now. I have lots of places I can hide.Under the porch with the Tonka trucks?

[Shelli]

"forlorn hope"... hahaha! Yes, godfry, I'm still laughing over that one. :laughcry:

[biochemgirl]

Companionship is, I think, the most valuable aspect of a marriage. I mean, after all the love, trust, compromise, and all that stuff.

Having someone just be around seems like it would be nice.

My problem is, whatif they want to be around, and I want my three feet of space? Sometimes I go days without talking. I wouldn't wish that on someone. Plus, there's always the inevitable 'what's wrong?', when in reality, there is nothing wrong, I just don't have anything to say.

It'd be unfair of me to expect someone to just leave me alone when I want to be by myself.

I was seeing an old friend for a few months, and it started to look like we might actually get to the toothbrush stage. But, it didn't work out, and after the fact, I found myself wondering how I would have handled having to share my thoughts with someone. It's an obligation I don't know I am prepared to meet.


Oh I don't know qb. I'm very similar, I like to be alone with my thoughts a lot of the time, and the hubby is very good about respecting that. Of course it takes the right person to be that way, and luckily I am very blessed in that aspect. So many people feel the need to talk all the time (it's my biggest pet peeve at work), but I think eventually in a committed relationship you get to the point where you are comfortable with silence and giving your significant other their space.

[quiet bear]

godfry's description of his realtionship sounded like something really good to have.

[Shelli]

Honestly, except for legalities involved in credit, borrowing money, and health insurance coverage, I, personally, don't see a need for marriage. It's a piece of paper. A relationship is what it is regardless of it.

[Beth]

My husband insists that he would never remarry. I don't really think that it is because he'll miss me forever. I think it is because he thinks that marriage is too painful.

[JoeP]

but I think eventually in a committed relationship you get to the point where you are comfortable with silence and giving your significant other their space.

You're not giving your llama much space, are you?

If you had to remarry, I can just see it ... the critical moment ... the officiating ranger would say "I now pronounce you llama and wife."

[JoeP]

My husband insists that he would never remarry. I don't really think that it is because he'll miss me forever. I think it is because he thinks that marriage is too painful.Second marriages: the triumph of hope over experience.

:wave: Beth!

[Beth]

Hehe. I'll pass that on to him, then, Joe.
Hope you had a nice holiday.:)

[biochemgirl]

but I think eventually in a committed relationship you get to the point where you are comfortable with silence and giving your significant other their space.

You're not giving your llama much space, are you?

If you had to remarry, I can just see it ... the critical moment ... the officiating ranger would say "I now pronounce you llama and wife."

:giggle:

Well, you know what they say, you have to keep your llama on a short leash.

[JonPaine]

:giggle:

Well, you know what they say, you have to keep your llama on a short leash.Sweet avatar, biochemgirl. You look just as I imagined you would (in a good way).

[biochemgirl]

Thanks :wink:

[JoeP]

Since I'm catching up on old threads...
My husband insists that he would never remarry. I don't really think that it is because he'll miss me forever. I think it is because he thinks that marriage is too painful.

"Dear, if I died, and you remarried ..."
"Darling, I could never even think of marrying someone else."
"No, but supposing you did ... would you let her wear my clothes?"
"Oh no, she'd be much thinner than you."
or,
"Oh no, she's much thinner than you are."