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View Full Version : My Anaconda Don't Want None Unless You Got Flood, Hon

livius drusus
10-19-2007, 04:09 AM
Massachusetts Aquarium Houses Pregnant Anaconda (http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5jiL00vDwoTn10G7ANlRsXS04LXrwD8SBVRK01)

Man-made rain and flooding, along with some extra food, were enough to convince the trio of anacondas at the New England Aquarium to breed in captivity for the first time. One of the aquarium's two female anacondas is confirmed pregnant by the lone male.
Ensign Steve
10-19-2007, 04:10 AM
Hm. I didn't know anacondas were bigamists. :reading:
livius drusus
10-19-2007, 04:11 AM
Freaks, they are.
Dingfod
10-19-2007, 04:22 AM
I thought this was about sex.
Ensign Steve
10-19-2007, 04:33 AM
That's how animals become pregnant.

ETA: ... I think. :chin:
ChuckF
10-19-2007, 04:36 AM
Wow. I'm pretty sure I'd start sending out resumés if anyone asked me to do an ultrasound on an anaconda.
livius drusus
10-19-2007, 04:40 AM
What if they just asked you to squirt the gel on the paddles?
ChuckF
10-19-2007, 04:42 AM
Maybe if it was way over on the side of the room. But I think I'll go ahead and rule out giant boa gynecology all together.
livius drusus
10-19-2007, 04:43 AM
Snakist.
ChuckF
10-19-2007, 04:46 AM
Yeah, go ahead and feel superior next time you're giving a python a pap smear.
livius drusus
10-19-2007, 05:04 AM
Everything's a prostate exam to you, isn't it? :no:
Uthgar the Brazen
10-19-2007, 03:45 PM
Snakez iz mormunz!!11!!11! :shock:
wei yau
10-19-2007, 04:11 PM
Massachusetts Aquarium Houses Pregnant Anaconda (http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5jiL00vDwoTn10G7ANlRsXS04LXrwD8SBVRK01)

...One of the aquarium's two female anacondas is confirmed pregnant by the lone male.

This wording is so weird, it's as it wasn't enough to state that one of the female anacondas is confirmed by pregnant, but apparently it was necessary to confirm the paternity.

But, if that was the only male anaconda, wouldn't this statement be unnecessary?

Unless there's some inter-species romance going on in the Reptile House.

Just where is Sock Puppet anyway? Is he really in Texas?
Blake
10-19-2007, 05:54 PM
Plus, it would have been more expected for an aquarium spokesperson to confirm the pregnancy, rather than the male anaconda.
Clutch Munny
10-19-2007, 07:29 PM
What if they just asked you to squirt the gel on the paddles?

If you gave him a mag, and a few minutes of private time, yes he would. But not with no snake. That's just wrong.
Uthgar the Brazen
10-19-2007, 08:41 PM
There's a joke about a snake's snake percolating here, but then someone would post an educational YouTube video that I'd inadvertently click on, resulting in even more deep emotional scarring.
But
10-19-2007, 08:56 PM
But, if that was the only male anaconda, wouldn't this statement be unnecessary?

Unless there's some inter-species romance going on in the Reptile House.


Maybe Chuck did it after squirting the gel on his paddle.
Ensign Steve
10-19-2007, 10:10 PM
Massachusetts Aquarium Houses Pregnant Anaconda (http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5jiL00vDwoTn10G7ANlRsXS04LXrwD8SBVRK01)

...One of the aquarium's two female anacondas is confirmed pregnant by the lone male.

This wording is so weird, it's as it wasn't enough to state that one of the female anacondas is confirmed by pregnant, but apparently it was necessary to confirm the paternity.

But, if that was the only male anaconda, wouldn't this statement be unnecessary?

Unless there's some inter-species romance going on in the Reptile House.

Just where is Sock Puppet anyway? Is he really in Texas?

Or if they were in the Jurassic Park, the one girl could have gotten the other girl pregnant. I think that's how that works.
SharonDee
10-20-2007, 02:06 AM
I don't understand this thread's title.
:scratch:
livius drusus
10-20-2007, 02:17 AM
Well, of course it refers to anacondas needing flood conditions to get in the mood, but primarily it's a reference to Sir Mix-a-lot's chef d'oeuvre.

Baby Got Back
SharonDee
10-20-2007, 02:24 AM
It's not playing for me but I think I remember some of the lyrics. I still don't get it, though. Which part is it subbing for?
livius drusus
10-20-2007, 02:25 AM
My anaconda don't want none unless you've got buns, hon.
Plant Woman
10-20-2007, 09:19 PM
:vapours:
Sock Puppet
10-24-2007, 04:31 PM
Just where is Sock Puppet anyway? Is he really in Texas?Heh, you wanna know the truly bizarre thing? I was at the San Antonio Zoo the day you posted this. I did, in fact, see an anaconda there. And no, s/he didn't do a thing for me, sorry. It did look lonely, and I'm a sympathetic sort of guy, but there were children present.

Besides, I am SICK of these muthafuckin' snakes in these muthafuckin' zoos.