It's Friday night. Let's get tossed!

[Ensign Steve]

Well, it's almost 3:30 pm ET, and I'm done for the week. I had a loooooong afternoon of snoozeworthy safety briefings and terrorism briefings. My day culminated with some FANTABULOUS news and then being released early. My door had not finished closing before I cracked open my first beer. I have 4 twelve-ounce bottles of Bavaria Holland beer. I'd never heard of it, but it was inexpensive and I was pleased to find it does not taste like American piss beer. Dutch piss beer? Probably.

So... what are we drinkin' tonight?

:cincin: :drunk3: :chug: :tapbeer: :datedrnk: :partyhat: :friday:

[Dingfod]

You probably haven't heard. I don't drink anymore. I'm down to two or three brain cells left, I can't spare any and expect to maintain a functioning brain stem. I can be the designated driver, but it'll help if you're drunk so you don't know if I got lost or not; it's an alcohol induced short-term memory problem. I think I need a direct injection of monkey fetus stem cells.

[Ensign Steve]

I think I need a direct injection of monkey fetus stem cells.

Wow! That's a little hardcore for me. I'll stick with beer, thanks!

[Ensign Steve]

I'm opening my third beer, it's 4:30 on the left coast, why am I the only one here? (the only one who isn't mainlining monkey fetuses, anyway)

I'm hitting things with my new hammer (mostly nail heads) and stinging "I would hammer in the moooorning, I would hammer in the eeeev'ning, all over this laaaaand..." It's pretty sad, really.

[Socratoad]

You probably haven't heard. I don't drink anymore. I'm down to two or three brain cells left, I can't spare any and expect to maintain a functioning brain stem. I can be the designated driver, but it'll help if you're drunk so you don't know if I got lost or not; it's an alcohol induced short-term memory problem. I think I need a direct injection of monkey fetus stem cells.

Yes warrenly, I did hear that you're not drinking any more, but are you drinking as much? :D

[Socratoad]

I'm opening my third beer, it's 4:30 on the left coast, why am I the only one here? (the only one who isn't mainlining monkey fetuses, anyway)

I'm hitting things with my new hammer (mostly nail heads) and stinging "I would hammer in the moooorning, I would hammer in the eeeev'ning, all over this laaaaand..." It's pretty sad, really.


Another por old bugger who is ubable to drink anymore. With me its a blood sugar problem.

But damn it girl sing it out for me and raise a glass as well. You are singing one of my favourites. During your next beer would you please sing "Michael Rowed The Boat Ashore"
Oh how I could belt that one out hour after hour, forcing anyone present to do the same ...... good memories. :D

[Ensign Steve]

Why is Ensign Steve so excited about a damn hammer, you ask. Or maybe you don't. But here's why:

http://i23.ebayimg.com/03/i/03/22/27/51_1_b.JPG

http://i4.ebayimg.com/03/i/03/1d/c8/fd_1_b.JPG

http://i16.ebayimg.com/03/i/03/1e/86/de_1.JPG

http://i14.ebayimg.com/03/i/03/1e/0a/8d_1.JPG

http://i22.ebayimg.com/03/i/03/1d/c5/00_1_b.JPG

I received these five plates from a friend whose father had owned them before he passed away. Now they are hanging on my wall. Yay! They are not perfectly spaced on the wall or anything, which should drive Brimshack and others nuts, but I'm on my third beer and plus I don't really care.

[Socratoad]

Why is Ensign Steve so excited about a damn hammer, you ask. Or maybe you don't. But here's why:

http://i23.ebayimg.com/03/i/03/22/27/51_1_b.JPG

http://i4.ebayimg.com/03/i/03/1d/c8/fd_1_b.JPG

http://i16.ebayimg.com/03/i/03/1e/86/de_1.JPG

http://i14.ebayimg.com/03/i/03/1e/0a/8d_1.JPG

http://i22.ebayimg.com/03/i/03/1d/c5/00_1_b.JPG

I received these five plates from a friend whose father had owned them before he passed away. Now they are hanging on my wall. Yay! They are not perfectly spaced on the wall or anything, which should drive Brimshack and others nuts, but I'm on my third beer and plus I don't really care.

Oh wow, those are beautiful plates. One of my favourite movies. Wow again, imagine the entire cast of "Cat On A Hot Tin Roof".
:roflmao: :roflmao:

[Ensign Steve]

Sorry, which movie?

"You know what six movies average out to be pretty good? The six original Star Trek movies." - Philip J. Fry, Futurama

[Ensign Steve]

I am drinking alone in my apartment and on this board. What up with that?

I drank a cigarette butt. I took a swig and felt something solid hit the back of my throat. I knew at once what it was because earlier I was thinking I had better be careful not to confuse the beer I was drinking with the empty bottle I was throwing my butts in. It didn't taste bad. It didn't taste like anything, actually. I had no problem extracting the butt from my mouth, but in an effort not to swallow the "cherry" part of it, I spit beer all over myself, my desk, and my floor. Yay!

[livius drusus]

Oh man that's repulsive. Next you'll be drinking bong water, JD. :yuck:

[viscousmemories]

You probably haven't heard. I don't drink anymore.
Yes warrenly, I did hear that you're not drinking any more, but are you drinking as much? :D
:roflmao: I've never heard that. Good one. :yup:

[viscousmemories]

I am drinking alone in my apartment and on this board. What up with that?

I drank a cigarette butt.
This is why it's pointless to try to assess whether someone else has a drinking problem. If drinking beer spiked with cigarette butts alone in your room doesn't bother you, what's the problem? :D

[livius drusus]

I think Friday night parties are a Hole kinda deal. After all, just cause you're drinking doesn't mean you're looking to have a discussion on beverages, and I know cigarette butts don't count as food. :wink:

How're you feeling today, JD?

[Farren]

I live in a country where the Brit convention applies when "tossed" is mentioned (which is rare). It means "masturbated", so I had a brief hot flush when I saw the thread title, especially since the good Ensign can be quite a dirty girl when she's of a mood.

[Ensign Steve]

vm: no problem! ;)

liv: fine thanks. I only made it through three beers anyway. I don't think the butt thing was a drunken mistake, just a stupid one.

farren: it doesn't have to be Friday or nighttime for me to take care of that! geez!

[Farren]

Yeah but I thought you were gonna get really descriptive about it.