"I've got more taste in my penis."

[D. Scarlatti]

I got this silly assignment to write a four-page essay on why such and such is the best TV show or movie. See if we can write, I guess. I had no idea what to do and just happened to be watching True Romance the night before the assignment was due. Some excerpts:

"screenwriter Quentin Tarantino ... call girl ... kung fu triple feature ... former pimp Drexl ... Elvis Presley ... overcome with a tray of Chinese food, shoots Drexl in the genitals ... half a million dollars worth of uncut cocaine ... pursuit ... various unsavory characters ... Detroit's industrial netherworld ... submit to Walken's entreaties ... impregnated by Moors ... gunshots to the head ... Bronson Pinchot ... a car carrying William Shatner sprawled across its hood ... bag of cocaine ... explodes ... the barely conscious Floyd ... exceedingly violent scene ... a Swiss Army corkscrew, the lid of a toilet tank ... Sizemore and Penn ... similarly drawn firearms ... Clarence and Alabama escape ... acrobatic and meticulously choreographed scenes of brutal violence and gunslaying ... arguably limited sphere of Tarantino's influence ... gratuitous ... Natural Born Killers ..."

[livius drusus]

Okay first of all, best thread title ever. Second, best review ever. I kinda want to read the whole thing now. You should attach it for the nerds/potheads among us.

[D. Scarlatti]

... best thread title ever.

Best line in the movie too, with the possible exception of "Yes," as delivered by Brad Pitt. I think I've only seen him in about two movies (this one and Thelma and Louise) but he should have won an Oscar© for his deft portrayal of Floyd.

Second, best review ever. I kinda want to read the whole thing now. You should attach it for the nerds/potheads among us.

Nah it's boring. If I had any balls I would have handed in the condensed version.

[viscousmemories]

Excellent abridged review. I really need to see that movie again. It's been at least 10 years since I saw it last...

Hehe... Floyd. :bonghit:

[Ensign Steve]

The absolute best line in that entire movie:

"Now, if that's a fact, tell me, am I lying?"

[Goliath]

/me looks at the thread title...

B..b..but I've been soaking my crotch in soy sauce three hours per night every night for the past three months!

:sadnana:

:kickscan:

[livius drusus]

Oh no way that's the best line. The best line is a tie between Floyd's "Get some beer. And some cleaning products." and Lee's "Don't give me the finger! I'll have you fucking killed!"

[Ensign Steve]

Oh no way that's the best line.

Whaaaaaaaaaaat? Girl, you trippin'.

[livius drusus]

No, you ah!