I've learned...

[Lauri D]

So I'm sitting around the house (friends I'm staying with for a few more days until *gasp* moving in temporarily to my grandparents' place until I decide where to land after selling the house).

As usual, I find myself itchy without something to read, so I absentmindedly pick up one of those little coffee-table books chock-full of pithy little quotes and advice on Life In General. Normally, this type of thing makes me gag and retch, but some of these are actually pretty amusing and thought-provoking. The quotations were compiled by the author, collected from persons ranging in age from 5 to 95. I thought I would share a couple of my favorites and invite you all to join in if the spirit moves you ;)

I've learned that you should never jump out of a second story window using a sheet for a parachute. - Age 10

I've learned that you can keep going long after you think you can't. - Age 69

I've learned that age is important only if you are a cheese. - Age 76 :mousecheese:

I've learned that regrets over yesterday and the fear of tomorrow are twin thieves that rob us of the moment. - Age 29

I've learned to keep looking ahead. There are still so many good books to read, sunsets to see, friends to visit, and dogs to take walks with. - Age 86

I've learned that if I don't try new things, I won't learn new things. - Age 36

I've learned that there are no unimportant acts of kindness. - Age 44

...and my personal favorite today for no apparent reason:

I've learned that when I eat fish sticks, they help me swim faster because they're fish. - Age 7

:bliss:

Ok, anyone have one (or more) of their own? I gotta come up with something original now... :blush:

[xouper]

I've learned that if you try to please everyone, someone won't like it.


I've learned that the most important thing on every skydive is to have an open parachute before you get to the ground.


I've learned that emotion follows belief. If you alter your expectations, assumptions, or beliefs about reality, then your emotions will adjust accordingly and automatically.


I've learned that not everyone values free speech as much as I do.

[Ex-zombie]

I've learned that sometimes broken hearts don't heal.

I've learned that assholes make the best friends.

[Ensign Steve]

I've learned that dogs enjoy bubble wrap as much as people do.

I've learned that cleaning the burnt barbecue sauce off the George Foreman grill before use is not optional.

[Miss Shelby]

I've learned that no matter which fast food restaurant you choose to get your burger from, you will always get hot pickles.

Michelle

[Dingfod]

I've learned the older I get the less sure I am of what I used to know.

[kensloft]

I've learned that the more that you help some people in need, the more they expect you to do their work for them.

[wei yau]

I've learned that trying to remove a porn tape from the VHS with a screwdriver while the machine is still plugged in will result in you sitting on the floor, with your pants around your ankles and a stunned look on your face.

[Dingfod]

I've learned that wearing cotton socks all day without shoes on will dry your feet out to the point of cracking.

[Ex-zombie]

with your pants around your ankles and a stunned look on your face.


Probably from the porn. Not the electricity. :shocking:

[SharonDee]

I have learned that I turn into a big baby about a headache*, especially when it's been a long time since my last one.
:headache:


*We ain't talkin' migraines; I mean plain old garden variety headaches. I'm a puss.

[viscousmemories]

I'm with you, Sharon. I hate headaches. Oddly, I hardly ever get them. I used to get them all the time when I was younger. I can't think of another aspect of my health that has actually improved with age. :chin:

[Petra]

I've learned...and try not to puke y'all....but I've learned that if you believe you can, you can. :yup:

I've also learned that while I may not be as good as I'd like to be in some arenas, I'm better than I thought I was in others. Ergo, it's all good. :cool:


Oh, the things I've learned... :yoda:

[Ex-zombie]

I've learned...and try not to puke y'all....but I've learned that if you believe you can, you can. :yup:


:puke: Too late!

[Miss Shelby]

I have learned that anyone who can exist on this planet without the use of prescription anti-depressants is probably immortal.

Michelle

[Ensign Steve]

I'm with you, Sharon. I hate headaches. Oddly, I hardly ever get them. I used to get them all the time when I was younger. I can't think of another aspect of my health that has actually improved with age. :chin:

Possibly because you are taking better care of yourself?

[viscousmemories]

Possibly because you are taking better care of yourself?
Hmm... could be, I reckon. I know I suspected for a long time that it was the bright sun causing the headaches, so I started wearing really dark sunglasses whenever I went out in the sun. Come to think of it, I've pretty much been adhering to that my whole adult life, so maybe that was the reason. :D