Most Disappointing Movie

[Ex-zombie]

In an effort to fulfill my obligation to the general :livcrop: and curiosity about the tastes of my fellow posters I am asking if there was a movie that you had exceptionally high hopes for and it just completely stunk up the theatre.

I had such hope for the movie "The Piano". I read the reviews. A co-worker and two friends who had not let me down before highly recommended this movie.

OMG. This movie failed and failed hard. The plot was absurd. There was no character development. I neither hated nor loved any of the characters. I just didn't buy the story at all. Because of my previous hopes for this film it now tops my list of the worst movies ever made.

I'm not looking for your critique of The Piano, I realize each person has their own taste in films. Are there any movies that were an utter disappointment for you?

[beyelzu]

matrix revolutions


the second one was my favorite when it came out because I thought that there were just a fuckload of possibilities and then the third one dashed my hopes.

it wasnt that bad, but it lessened the second movie as well by not fulfilling on the first and second's promise.

[Crumb]

Yeah, bey. I think it was pretty obvious that they were unplanned sequels thrown together to capatalize on the success of the matrix.

I don't know about most disappointing, but I was recently disappointed by Ocean's Twelve, and awhile ago by Timeline. I read the book and loved it, but the movie didn't live up to it. I really should have expected that.

[livius drusus]

Gladiator. I had been waiting for it for ever so long. I'm a huge fan of the sword and toga classics of technicolor cinemascope Hollywood, and I thought Gladiator would be The One Epic to Rule Them All.

Instead, it was a jitter-cam, shit CGI piece of crap. I mean, they even made the Colosseum look small. It's not small, man. It's fucking huge. Bastards. God I'm still so bitter.

[viscousmemories]

I have such a bad memory I had to go through my movie review journal (http://www.freethought-forum.com/forum/journal.php?do=view&journalid=3) for a refresher, and I got one.

Secret Window - Starring Johnny Depp and John Turturro, written by Stephen King

I've loved almost everything involving the three people mentioned above. For that, I can forgive them for wasting my two hours with this rancid piece of boredom.

[Blake]

You may not have been looking for it, but you're going to get it.

One of my criteria for a work of art is that it not hurt. I suppose there's a place for such an experience, but it better be short and sweet. I worked for a sound designer once whom I respected very much, but I don't understand why he later presented (and the director didn't veto) a sound design that hurt the audience's eardrums for an extended period at the opening of the show.

The Piano hurt. It was so unrelentingly, aggressively, phosphorescently GREEN. For the first third of the movie, all you saw was shades of eye-wateringly bright, vibrating green, with spots of black and white. It was such a relief when we finally shifted to a quiet, restful indoor candlelit scene and got to indulge in some browns and yellows along with the white and black--although soon enough, and for the majority of the rest of the movie, we were back to the green ocular assault. I hate that movie with a passion. That green was a sustained choice, and a very, very, bad one, part and parcel of its drippingly repulsive powers-of-ten pretentiousness.

/me shakes himself

Sorry. Anyway, I suspect there's another movie out there that might better qualify, on account of my having had higher hopes for it, but for now I'm going to name Beyond Rangoon. I expected it to be a decent movie, and was looking forward to being politically educated in some new way; instead, it has earned the distinction of the only movie I've ever walked out of. Patricia Arquette was so bad, the script was so awful ... it was extraordinary.

[Ensign Steve]

Mercury Rising. I don't know, the trailers made it look so good! It was crap, and I can't even remember why. I thought it was going to be about a boy genius breaking codes, and it was really about Bruce Willis outrunning a speeding train, or something.

[The Lone Ranger]

The Thin Red Line. Gack! I went in with such high expectations, but I simply hated that movie!

Cheers,

Michael

[Ex-zombie]

The Piano hurt. It was so unrelentingly, aggressively, phosphorescently GREEN. For the first third of the movie, all you saw was shades of eye-wateringly bright, vibrating green, with spots of black and white. It was such a relief when we finally shifted to a quiet, restful indoor candlelit scene and got to indulge in some browns and yellows along with the white and black--although soon enough, and for the majority of the rest of the movie, we were back to the green ocular assault. I hate that movie with a passion. That green was a sustained choice, and a very, very, bad one, part and parcel of its drippingly repulsive powers-of-ten pretentiousness.


Another fellow with extremely good taste! :cool:

[Gurdur]

Matrix 2 and 3.
Jurassic Park 2, 3 and 4.

And above all the cinematic adaption of one of William Gibson's short stories (I forget the name, but they had Keanu Reeves again as hero).

You know, they really fucked Gibson over with that movie -- not only was the movie complete crap just on its own terms, not only did the movie veer horribly away from the original story to the point of non-recognisability, but they also brought out a new novel by someone else as a novelization of the movie.

IOW, the book of the film of the other book. Gah.

[Crumb]

There was a fourth Jurassic Park?

[lady cop]

any sequel to JAWS l, ( i really was rooting for the :shark: ) and the putrid bore moulin rouge. blech.

[Dingfod]

Hands down, it was Star Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menace. What a letdown.
/me sighs

[Dingfod]

any sequel to JAWS l, ( i really was rooting for the :shark: ) and the putrid bore moulin rouge. blech.Moulin Rouge? It's one of the few movies I actually own. I loved it.


Hmmm, maybe I am gay or something. I loved Chicago and Phantom of the Opera too.

[viscousmemories]

Maybe? :giggle:

[Crumb]

Might as well go buy yourself some assless chaps, warrenly... :giggles:

[Dingfod]

Might as well go buy yourself some assless chaps, warrenly... :giggles:Remarkably enough... :wink:

[Bella]

any sequel to JAWS l, ( i really was rooting for the :shark: ) and the putrid bore moulin rouge. blech.Moulin Rouge? It's one of the few movies I actually own. I loved it.

Hmmm, maybe I am gay or something. I loved Chicago and Phantom of the Opera too.
For the record, I loved Moulin Rouge and Chicago too. POTO not so much - but there were a few redeeming qualities :).

But then again, I'm gay.

[Shake]

matrix revolutions


the second one was my favorite when it came out because I thought that there were just a fuckload of possibilities and then the third one dashed my hopes.

it wasnt that bad, but it lessened the second movie as well by not fulfilling on the first and second's promise.
Agreed. The one thing that kept coming back to me was that at the end of the first film, Neo is significantly faster than the agents. Why then does he struggle so much against Smith in 2 and 3? Or anyone else in the Matrix for that matter?

But even worse:The Thin Red Line. Gack! I went in with such high expectations, but I simply hated that movie!

Cheers,

Michael
Sheesh! How many big-name celebs were wasted on this heaping pile of dung? It was just ... So. Fucking. BORING!

I mean, it's a war flick, but even the freakin' battle scenes were boring! How the fuck do you do that?

Too much of the movie is spent inside a character's head. Almost like in Dune.

[Dingfod]

For the record, I loved Moulin Rouge and Chicago too. POTO not so much - but there were a few redeeming qualities :).

But then again, I'm gay.You're not helping. :wink:

[viscousmemories]

You're not helping. :wink:
Fine for her, everyone likes lesbians.

[inland wave]

Warenly.....
remarkably enough....don't you have a pair of assless chaps? To use when you ride Moby? Where's a camera when you need one! :wink:

[Ex-zombie]

Warenly.....
remarkably enough....don't you have a pair of assless chaps? To use when you ride Moby? Where's a camera when you need one! :wink:

:roflmao:

[lady cop]

any sequel to JAWS l, ( i really was rooting for the :shark: ) and the putrid bore moulin rouge. blech.Moulin Rouge? It's one of the few movies I actually own. I loved it.


Hmmm, maybe I am gay or something. I loved Chicago and Phantom of the Opera too.
i don't know why i hated moulin rouge except it bored me to distraction. but i loved chicago beyond belief. i love musicals.i love birdcage. and south beach. and gloria esteban. MAMBO!

[CARLA]

Ex-zombie,

I had such hope for the movie "The Piano". I hated this movie. I could barely make it to the end..http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/1/1_4_127.gif It just stunk.. :yup: :yup:

The other movie that bored me to tears was "OUT OF AFRICA" I was numb when I left ... BORING.. :popcorn:

I know there are more,have to give this some thought.. :chin:

Two of my favorite movies: "USUAL SUSPECTS" with Kevin Spacey 1995, and "The Shawshank Redemption" (1994) :bow:

[koan]

Part of the problem with some films are the rave reviews and all your friends making a big deal about how many times they've seen it already. I always try to go to a film with minimal expectations so they can impress me.

There was a film I saw as a teenager that was so bad I couldn't remember a thing about it. I watched it three times because I didn't remember that I'd even seen it. I'd tell you what it is but...I can't remember. :thinkup:

[Brimshack]

The Thin Red Line and Gladiator both sucked. Each had a few interesting moments, but mostly they sucked. I was disappointed in The Matrtix, yes I mean the first one. I didn't hate it, but after all I heard about it, it just didn't do it for me. I would have been disapppointed in the Star Wars prequals, but I never expected them to be good.

[Dingfod]

"Oh, oh, oh, oh, Mr. Kotter, Mr. Kotter." --Arnold Horschak

A more recent movie of much disappointment (unless you like half the movie consisting of longing gazes between men): Alexander

[Dingfod]

There have been films so bad I walked out of the theater before they were over, and many others that I wanted to walk out on. Now, I just don't go to them to begin with, with the exception of Alexander. But maybe that's because I'm gay or something.


I just thought of another disappointing film, Gods and Generals. It was so fucking boring I was glad when my daughter paged my cellphone wanting me to pick her up during the intermission. I watched the last half of it on HBO. It didn't get any better. I was almost glad when that preachy Stonewall Jackson kicked the bucket.

[The Lone Ranger]

How about The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou?

I had such expectations for that film! I mean, it's Bill Murray for cryin' out loud! He was simply amazing in Lost in Translation. Add in Willem Dafoe, Cate Blanchett, Jeff Goldblum, Anjelica Huston, and the generally amusing Owen Wilson and you've got a guaranteed, sure-fire thing, right?

Wrong.

Maybe I just don't "get it." The reviewers have been falling all over themselves to say what a wonderful film this is, but I thought it was just plain boring. Not one scene so much as made me want to crack a smile. Not one character struck me as being at all interesting. By midway through the movie, I was just wanting it to end already.

Cheers,

Michael

[Crumb]

Funny, that's kind of the same way I felt about Lost in Translation

[Blake]

Not quite all the reviewers, Michael. Salon's reviewer was quite reserved; if I recall correctly, s/he ended up judging it more of a collection of scenes than a movie, saying neither the characters nor the story ever turned out coherent. On the basis of that review, I was disappointed in the movie before seeing it, so I haven't yet. ;)

[viscousmemories]

Funny, that's kind of the same way I felt about Lost in Translation
:eek:

[Ab_Normal]

Gurdur, you're thinking of Johnny Mnemonic (http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0113481/) -- the scariest bit is William Gibson has the screenplay credit. I seem to recall reading and/or seeing interviews with him at the time where he expresses happiness with the production.

Fortunately for my enjoyment of the film, I have this perverse attraction to Keanu Reeves. Mmmm... eye candy that can't act... but I still won't pay more than $2.50 to see Constantine.

[Crumb]

Perhaps I just didn't get it... Oh well.

[Adam]

... but I still won't pay more than $2.50 to see Constantine.

Constantine, oddly enough, isn't half bad. I mean, they changed all the details, and it's certainly not Hellblazer, but I didn't expect it to be, so it came off as entertaining and not entirely un-Hellblazer, if that makes any sense.

[beyelzu]

... but I still won't pay more than $2.50 to see Constantine.

Constantine, oddly enough, isn't half bad. I mean, they changed all the details, and it's certainly not Hellblazer, but I didn't expect it to be, so it came off as entertaining and not entirely un-Hellblazer, if that makes any sense.
thanks for the heads up.

since I was so sure that it would suck and I love the comic, specially the ellis run, I wasnt going to see it. I think I will now.

[livius drusus]

Constantine, oddly enough, isn't half bad. I mean, they changed all the details, and it's certainly not Hellblazer, but I didn't expect it to be, so it came off as entertaining and not entirely un-Hellblazer, if that makes any sense.

Holy crap. Two posts today?! What is it a full moon or some shit? Well, anyway, I'm glad to hear you give it a thumbs up, Adam, because I was kinda feeling guilty about wanting to see it.

[Johnny Pneumatic]

I would have liked The Matrix if it weren't for the lack of knowledge of entropy, talk of fate and the spitting up of blood by their real bodies when they die a neurological death.

Episode 2 blew fecal matter out it's mouth. I looked like a freakin' video game and the script was so bad for Haden. A lot of money spent on bad special effects a good movie does not make.

[livius drusus]

Episode 2 blew fecal matter out it's mouth. I looked like a freakin' video game and the script was so bad for Haden. A lot of money spent on bad special effects a good movie does not make.

Can I get an Amen. It was very seriously one of the worst piece of shit movies I've ever seen. I'd much, much rather watch some B movie which knows its place than spend a minute in front of pretentious, over-budget, vacuous nonsense like Matrix Reloaded.

[wei yau]

<obligatory Matrix nitpick>
I hated those walking armored tanks in Matrix 3. What was the point of those things?

- They weren't mobile enough to perform any better than fixed gun emplacements.

- The pilots were woefully unprotected, like strapping a gunner to a lawn chair on top of an M1 Abrams.

</obligatory Matrix nitpick>

[Crumb]

I missed Matrix 3. After the second one I didn't bother.

[Dingfod]

I thought The Matrix (1) was a good movie. Neo had discovered the secret: There was no spoon. As far I was concerned, it was over. I only went to see the sequels to see Carrie Ann Moss in that tight black outfit. Mmmm.

[Adam]

since I was so sure that it would suck and I love the comic, specially the ellis run, I wasnt going to see it. I think I will now.

It's definitely not the comic, like I said, so as long as you don't go in expecting it to be, it's entertaining enough. There are a couple of clever twists that I enjoyed, and the script doesn't force Keanu and Whatshername into an awkward love-interest situation like I was afraid it would.

I dunno if it's so much a full moon, liv, as it is that I switched jobs to something a bit less time consuming and stressful, came up for air, and realized I'd not been here in some time. Glad to see y'all are still here.

[viscousmemories]

Glad to see y'all are still here.
Likewise. :yup:

[TomJoe]

i love musicals.

Fiddler on the Roof! Oh wait, we're talking about movies that were hyped but sucked..

I'd have to go with Lost In Translation too.

[livius drusus]

I dunno if it's so much a full moon, liv, as it is that I switched jobs to something a bit less time consuming and stressful, came up for air, and realized I'd not been here in some time. Glad to see y'all are still here.

You switched jobs within the same company or got a whole new one? Either way that's just fabulous news. I'm really happy for you. Your old job sucked ass, and I'm not just saying that because you never had time to come by.

[Ab_Normal]

... but I still won't pay more than $2.50 to see Constantine.

Constantine, oddly enough, isn't half bad. I mean, they changed all the details, and it's certainly not Hellblazer, but I didn't expect it to be, so it came off as entertaining and not entirely un-Hellblazer, if that makes any sense.
Thanks for the recommendation. My husband really wants to go (a role-reversal; usually I make him go to the movies with the beefcake ;) ) and I'd prefer not to be seething into my popcorn the entire time...

[Dingfod]

Good thing, I hate seethened popcorn. :D

[Adam]

Why all the static about Lost in Translation? Did y'all actually think it was a bad movie, or just that it didn't live up to the hype? While I wouldn't award it Best Movie Ever status, I thought it was enjoyable, and a bit of a change from 99% of the crap movies that get produced. I might have missed out on a lot of the hype aroun dit, as I don't pay attention to most of the mainstream media, so I went in on nothing more than the word of a couple friends that it was a good film.

You switched jobs within the same company or got a whole new one? Either way that's just fabulous news. I'm really happy for you. Your old job sucked ass, and I'm not just saying that because you never had time to come by.

Switched jobs within the company. Rather than support 30-odd web applications, I'm a developer for just one of them now. And I agree, to the extent physically possible, my old job both sucked and blew. I was on call last week and had exactly one issue I had to deal with...and I dealt with it by contacting the on call person from my old team and telling her to fix it. :)

[Adam]

Now that I've defended two movies that other mentioned, I may was well go ahead and submit my own entries for Most Disappointing Movie. Unfortunately, I don't have any fun new movies to add to the list...gotta be a tossup between the third Matrix and the Star Wars prequels as a group.

The first Matrix was amazing and, while it had several obvious flaws in its science, I could easily suspend disbelief, as the science was just background to the theme of the movie. The second one was a mess, but it looked like we were being set up for something big. The general consensus amongst my friends and coworkers and I was that the third movie would reveal that the supposedly 'real' world to which Neo and company escaped was simply a second Matrix, designed to hold those who proved rebellious in the primary Matrix. No, sory, folks...all we have left is an overcooked sci-fi battle and a lame Christ analog.

Star Wars,,,bleh. It physically hurts to think about what great movies these could have been. The essential thread of the plot is actually halfway decent. Palpatine's manipulating the Senate into giving him more and more power is worthy of a Clavell novel. Unfortunately, Lucas chose to obscure that solid core with mind-numbing cheese, CGI muppets galore, and a love story in which the male and female leads appear to be reciting their passion for each other from index cards in a high school public speaking class.

[Crumb]

Unfortunately, Lucas chose to obscure that solid core with mind-numbing cheese, CGI muppets galore, and a love story in which the male and female leads appear to be reciting their passion for each other from index cards in a high school public speaking class.

:roflmao:

ex-fucking-xactly!

Why all the static about Lost in Translation? Did y'all actually think it was a bad movie, or just that it didn't live up to the hype?

I thought it was an ok movie. Not one I have any interest in seeing again, but it wasn't a waste of my time. There was a lot of hype and hearing about it ahead of time, and being a big Bill Murray fan and wanting to see him in a different kind of role, kind of set me up for disappointment. It is possible I just didn't "get" it. I dunno. :shrug:

[justaman]

I was looking forward to this arthouse movie "Coffee and Cigarettes". Had some awesome names in there, Steve Buscemi, Cate Blanchette, a bunch of other guys and it looked like it had some potential. In the end, worst movie I've ever seen. It's the first movie in a long time that I've not been able to finish. I didn't mind it not having a story, I was expecting that. But I was expecting some great acting and dialogue to make up for it. Nada. The opening skit was terrible and the rest was downhill. Cate did ok, but barely.

Seemed like an exercise in blatant theatrical masturbation. "They'll like it because it's so artsy and unconventional" just doesn't cut it. There needs to be some kind of talent visible for fucks sake.

[justaman]

The Thin Red Line and Gladiator both sucked. Each had a few interesting moments, but mostly they sucked.
I really didn't like thin red line when I first saw it, but then I had to watch it again and now I really like it, I actually think it's one of the best war-movies going around. There is a scene that goes for about 5 minutes where no one speaks and very little action actually happens. You never see movie-makers with the balls to do that nowadays.

And I also happen to think that shot of the pretty lilly-flower (or whatever it was) wavering up above the murky water under an overcast sky is one of the most poignant visual moments I've ever seen.