Omnihyper super name burn megathread

[ChuckF]

How many times have you seen me put in my place by a good name burn like "Mockie" or "MockF?" Do you cheer when Corona688 gets humbled by a devastating - get this - "Coronary"? Do you smile when you see known Canadian Clutch Munny laid low by a well-placed "Crotch Runny?" If so, then you like so many others are finding out about one of the internet's best-kept secrets: the name burn! It's the world's most powerful way to express sharp wit, disagreement, and personal dislike - all at the same time! How could anyone do without the name burn?

But name burning isn't something just anybody can do. Some people are born to the talent, but for most people, nameburning - like most things worthwhile - takes a lot of patience and practice. For example, let's say that :piginablanket: is new to the internet and he has gotten into a little quarrel with :skunk:. He sees all the cool kids using name burns, and he thinks that it's time for him to Win Conclusively with a name burn.

Good insight, Lucifer! wut
:piginablanket: ..................... :skunk:

Whoa, not so fast there :piginablanket:! That name burn doesn't make any sense and doesn't strike the mortal blow! That's the wrong way to do it. Now let's look at the right way to do it:

Your mom's a whore, whoreifer! OMGUS
:piginablanket: ............................... :skunk:

BURN! Now :skunk: is effectively neutralized and :piginablanket: is rightfully embraced as an Internet Master.

If you would like to learn to use name burns to their maximum potential, this is the thread for you. Whether you're a beginner looking to get your feet wet and destroy a few opponents, or a seasoned forum spectator looking for a few extra pointers just to get a little edge, you're sure to find what you're looking for here!

Observation and practice are the best way to learn, so this thread will employ a proven pedagogical method: post in this thread, and I will name burn you. I encourage thread participants to name burn me and each other as well. I want to see a maximum of name burning. It's like they say: a name holocaust flames all lolhogs.

But Chuck, you say, if I'm going to get name burned in this thread, how can I keep posting in it? Name burns are deathblows and I can't recover from a deathblow.

Don't worry! The name burns in this thread are strictly educational. They may sting a little, but they won't demolish you like a combat name burn, and they will help you toughen up so you have the wherewithal to conjure up a winning name burn when the chips are down. Plus, you can take notes on some of the name burns in this thread and save them for future use!

My program may not save you from an all-destroying name burn, but I am confident that it will help you develop the confidence and skills you need to deliver more name burn headshots more effectively. I guarantee it. If you're not 100% satisfied with this program, I will give you your money back. Are you ready for success?

Then let's get name burning! I need a volunteer.

[godfry n. glad]

MAdam volunteered.

I think the classic is "Chuck Fristians"....such a name burn on the silly christians. Masterful.

[ChuckF]

Let's have a big hand for GADFLY IN PLAID! How long are you folks in town?

[godfry n. glad]

Ooooo...That I like.

And true, too....even better. That's not a burn, that's a compliment.

Thanks!

[livius drusus]

Yes hello. I am interested in your internet burn lecture series and would particularly like to learn more about combination name burns and mom burns.

[godfry n. glad]

Now don't feel too bad for UpChuckF....he did it to himself.

[BrotherMan]

Ouch, good name burn, Duck Gristians.
:piginablanket:

[ChuckF]

Yes hello. I am interested in your internet burn lecture series and would particularly like to learn more about combination name burns and mom burns.
Hello lievius untruesus! We have an advanced course in name burns/mom burns, but I have to warn you that name burn/mom burn combos can cause a burning sensation, much like your mother, and not just anyone can do them, unlike your mother.

[ChuckF]

Ouch, good name burn, Duck Gristians.
:piginablanket:
Thanks BotherMan!

[Deadlokd]

:lolwut:

[ChuckF]

:lolwut:
Watch out here comes Deadmockd.

[Deadlokd]

Isn't that just a lame adaptation of MockF?

[Adam]

OMGUS!

If not for the safe confines of this very educational thread, I would surely be curled up beneath my coffee table, sobbing like a child whose candy had been stolen.

[ChuckF]

Isn't that just a lame adaptation of MockF?
MockF ranks among the greatest name burns in history, deadcock. It is an homage.

[Adam]

Isn't that just a lame adaptation of MockF?

Hey! This is a safe place for learning, Deadcrock! You keep your negativity to yourself!

[ChuckF]

OMGUS!

If not for the safe confines of this very educational thread, I would surely be curled up beneath my coffee table, sobbing like a child whose candy had been stolen.
If you can't take the heat then stay out of the kitchen ADUMB.

Because this is an educational thread I will not deal the non plus ultra irl name burn that I keep in reserve just in case Adam tries to go off the mob reservation.

[Deadlokd]

Isn't that just a lame adaptation of MockF?
MockF ranks among the greatest name burns in history, deadcock. It is an homage.

Now that's a burn.

I stand sobbing O great edumacator.

[ChuckF]

Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to start name burning or leave. People are trying to learn.

[Deadlokd]

sorry FhuckC.

[Qingdai]

Oh, do me! Um, that came out wrong.

FuckCh!

[ChuckF]

Oh, do me! Um, that came out wrong.

FuckCh!
Oh! Teachable moment right here!

In the UK, a pretty good name burn would be Quimdye, but in North America we would probably go with something like Qingdiarrhea.

[Qingdai]

Thanks Uckfay! I'll be crying silently to myself as I listen to "Emo's greatest hits."
Don't mind me.

[livius drusus]

Um, that came out wrong.
That's what your mother said after the doctor took you out of her, Fling pie.

:hyper: How'd I do? How'd I do? Too much too soon? Damn my extra-credit-craving, shiny-red-apple-leaving, teacher's-pet eyes. :kickscan:

[Qingdai]

:cries::cryhome:

[Naru]

I'm being name-burned.

:wave:

[Adam]

This is, indeed,an educational thread. Thanks to CockF and Lieswith Mooses, I think I've finally figured out how to pronounce "Qingdai".

OK, much like liv's mom, that last name burn sucked hard. Liv's name, unlike her mother, is really hard to do.

[ChuckF]

I'm being name-burned.

:wave:
:golfclap:

[Qingdai]

This is, indeed,an educational thread. Thanks to CockF and Lieswith Mooses, I think I've finally figured out how to pronounce "Qingdai".

OK, much like liv's mom, that last name burn sucked hard. Liv's name, unlike her mother, is really hard to do.

Nah, you still don't have it right the Q is pronounced Ch.

[Deadlokd]

I'm being name-burned.

:wave:
:golfclap:
:popcorn:

[ChuckF]

This is, indeed,an educational thread. Thanks to CockF and Lieswith Mooses, I think I've finally figured out how to pronounce "Qingdai".

OK, much like liv's mom, that last name burn sucked hard. Liv's name, unlike her mother, is really hard to do.

Nah, you still don't have it right the Q is pronounced Ch.
In that case, sorry Zilqdai, or perhaps Felqingdai.

[Naru]

Nothing beats MockF, in my opinion.

:golfclap: to dickthinks

[Adam]

This is, indeed,an educational thread. Thanks to CockF and Lieswith Mooses, I think I've finally figured out how to pronounce "Qingdai".

OK, much like liv's mom, that last name burn sucked hard. Liv's name, unlike her mother, is really hard to do.

Nah, you still don't have it right the Q is pronounced Ch.

Well, fuck those two, then. Fuck oblivious useless and Can'tpronounceshitF right in their ears.

Yes, I stole my own liv name burn from another thread...I've already done liv's name twice tonight, which is two times fewer than I've done Chuck's mom tonight and I'm understandably worn out.

[Stormlight]

:popcorn:

:unstare:

[chunksmediocrites]

:popcorn:

:unstare:

Ha-HA!

[chunksmediocrites]

Damn. I need to review the material again. Scrot-bite? Scornplight? Sporkfight?

[Qingdai]

Dear DuckF-ucker,
My husband's name is already a name burn? How can I make it worse?
I'd like him to cower under the bed each night, like your mom.

Too soon?

[godfry n. glad]

Nothing beats MockF, in my opinion.

:golfclap: to dickthinks

No, no, no...

That's half fast. Give it the full speed treatment like this:

:golfclap: to dickstinks

[Farren]

Dear UpchuckF,

I like to read about American politics on the Internets. What I have learned is that Demonrats are like the communists in my home state of West Bengal. I imagine them as being small and fast, with glowing red eyes. Repugnicans and Repiglicans, on the other hand, sound cute. I like pugs and pigs. Is this an accurate impression?

ps pls name-burn me because I am finding your caustic American wit very entrancing.

yrs
Revaliban Chandrasekar-Subramoney

[ChuckF]

Dear DuckF-ucker,
My husband's name is already a name burn? How can I make it worse?
I'd like him to cower under the bed each night, like your mom.

Too soon?
You are married to skunksidiotblights? My sympathy.

To him.

[ChuckF]

ps pls name-burn me because I am finding your caustic American wit very entrancing.

Ok DickYorkandDickSargentBothPlayedDarrenOnBewitched! BURN.

[godfry n. glad]

This is, indeed,an educational thread. Thanks to CockF and Lieswith Mooses, I think I've finally figured out how to pronounce "Qingdai".

OK, much like liv's mom, that last name burn sucked hard. Liv's name, unlike her mother, is really hard to do.

Nah, you still don't have it right the Q is pronounced Ch.
In that case, sorry Zilqdai, or perhaps Felqingdai.

Reaching...

I'd go for the simple insertion that makes it simultaneously racist hater, comment on the international financial situation, and disses her skill with medicinals: Qingkdai

Of course, if they don't know how to pronounce it, then dumbships like SuckAss wouldn't recognize the true humor in the burn, anyway.

[ChuckF]

^ in the business that's called a reverse midas burn. (c'mon clique, you gotta give it up for that)

[ChuckF]

:unstare:
Spermbite -

I am sorry it has taken me so long to name burn you. I was going to try to name burn (nummbrennen?) you in Lëtzebuergesch but I don't have the skills.

[godfry n. glad]

I do like livid bruises, too.

It just whispers scandal.

"Slobberin'" has to be one of the better ones of late....That's Doc X coinage, isn't it?

[Leesifer]

Dear Schmuckie

Did I get name-burned in the OP?

[Pan Narrans]

I think you did, Pees-in-fur.

[Leesifer]

Thanks monkey boy

[Dingfod]

Give me your best shot, FuckChucksmom.

[Dingfod]

This is, indeed,an educational thread. Thanks to CockF and Lieswith Mooses, I think I've finally figured out how to pronounce "Qingdai".

OK, much like liv's mom, that last name burn sucked hard. Liv's name, unlike her mother, is really hard to do.

Nah, you still don't have it right the Q is pronounced Ch.Why can't Chinese words and names spelled with Roman letters follow any common sense pronunciation rules?

Because they're fucking Chinese, motherfucka.

[ChuckF]

Dear Schmuckie

Did I get name-burned in the OP?
You totally did, Sleazifer! :lolhog:

[ChuckF]

I think you did, Pees-in-fur.
That's pretty good for a foreigner Panty Narrans.
Give me your best shot, FuckChucksmom.
So nice to see you here Dingchoad.

[LadyShea]

SuckS, how much is the advanced course which includes name-race burn combos?

[ChuckF]

SuckS, how much is the advanced course which includes name-race burn combos?
More jewgold than you're worth LadyShame.

[Smilin]

ShadyLay

:grin:

In before QueenFrog

[Farren]

Looks like this thread's become a free for all, Smellin'

[ChuckF]

gtfo Frownin!

ETA: Darren's is much better.

[LadyShea]

SuckS, how much is the advanced course which includes name-race burn combos?
More jewgold than you're worth LadyShame.

Is there a trial or introductory course? I believe lascivious dosuck is swarthy, and was hoping to get some pointers.

[Sock Puppet]

I agree with ChuckleFuck that Foreign's name burn was better.

[ChuckF]

Is there a trial or introductory course? I believe lascivious dosuck is swarthy, and was hoping to get some pointers.
ShadyLay: You can always put it on layaway. You are absolutely right that oblivious mucus has some race haet coming.

I agree with ChuckleFuck that Foreign's name burn was better.
Thanks and nice one, Cock Muppet!

[Dingfod]

You're not really helping LadyShaver, ChickFail.

[Pan Narrans]

I think you did, Pees-in-fur.
That's pretty good for a foreigner Panty Narrans.


Why, thank you SuckOff. I wish I could say the same to you.

[BrotherMan]

Hey DumbF, you run out of names to call people?

:wannafight:

[Sock Puppet]

Yeah, you gonna answer MotherBan's question or what, FuckChunks?

[curses]

Whatever, SpunkCrumpet.

[BrotherMan]

You stay out of this Sock Fukker, this is beetween me and HuckF.

:sisfight:

[ChuckF]

Why don't you just shut up ButthurtMan?

[Dingfod]

No, you, UpChuck.

[Adam]

You guys can do better than this...name burns? More like lame burns.

[Sock Puppet]

:nelson:

[Leesifer]

gtfo Saddam

[Adam]

NO U, Greasyfur!

My WMD, let me show you them!
:saddam:

[Watser?]

Is Loosyfer sticking up for her butt-buddy Schmuckoff again?

[Sock Puppet]

What's it to you, Waster?

[Leesifer]

Nice try Fapser?

[ChuckF]

More like Twatser?!

[erimir]

I'm being name-burned.

:wave:I was going to change your name, but I couldn't think of a name burn worse than naming yourself after a shitty children's anime show (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Naruto).

But what the hell, why not, Naputo.

Is name-burning someone in Spanish acceptable, CockFistin's?

[Dingfod]

errormere, stop picking on Nanook of the Not.

[Watser?]

What's it to you, Waster?

That's pretty lame, Sick Puppy. Much like what SuckChef's mom said about your dick.

[Leesifer]

Is that smegimir I see posting?

[Dingfod]

Leastasfar!

[Adam]

Is name-burning someone in Spanish acceptable, CockFistin's?

OMG if you're going to post here, speak English! Why do you hate America, erimierde??!!!1

[ChuckF]

What Cadamite said, Meximir!

[erimir]

So now it's a burn to imply I'm Mexican?

Coming from you, it's hardly an insult, ChuckF(rench).

I'd help coming up with race-burns for Lascivious Juices, but they might be used against me...

[ChuckF]

stfu WhyDoYouHateAmerimir

[Garnet]

Be gentle with me...

[ChuckF]

Ok, we'll start out nice and easy Hairnet.

[beyelzu]

is this a private party, chokefuck?


or can anyone play

[ChuckF]

is this a private party, chokefuck?


or can anyone play
Say it don't spray it sprayhellzoo.

[Nullifidian]

Ok, we'll start out nice and easy Hairnet.

Or Garnish.

And let us take some time to pay homage to one of the great name burns, LMUS DRUSUS. :bow:

Sorry, Liv! :livglomp:

[ChuckF]

Nullfidiot isn't worthy to kiss the ground that imus walks on.

[beyelzu]

quiet, dullifidian,


i must say your mom, so less dull in bed than your name would suggest.

[erimir]

stfu WhyDoYouHateAmerimirI saw you change that from just plain old "Amerimir", ChuckFeathens.

Or Garnish.Garnish? That's the best you can do, Skullifuckian?

As long as we're offering incredibly lame name-burns for Garnet, let me add DarnIt.

[beyelzu]

you would know all about lame


lamier

[erimir]

Shut it, Gayelzu

[ChuckF]

I saw you change that from just plain old "Amerimir", ChuckFeathens.

That's a really good story erimacaca. gb2 mexico.

[erimir]

I wish Branded Whorr would come in here so we could pick on one of our pre-approved bullying targets.

Also come on people, queerimir is so obvious.

[Ensign Steve]

you would know all about lame


lamier
Oh, whatever, dude. Everybody knows you be a losah.

:ohsnap:

[ChuckF]

Hey ms_gland_grope, I see you reading this thread. And you thanked the OP, so nut up and gtf in here. :deeznuts:

ETA: Oh look Ensign Heave is here.

[ChuckF]

I wish Branded Whorr would come in here so we could pick on one of our pre-approved bullying targets.

Also come on people, queerimir is so obvious.
Yeah we (teh mob) were thinking about queerimir, fagimir, fairymir, etc. but figured you would be expecting the gay burn right out of the gate.

[beyelzu]

quiet insane skeeve



we need none of your sass, you will shut the fuck up if you know whats good for you


:tmgrin:

[Nullifidian]

I wish Branded Whorr would come in here so we could pick on one of our pre-approved bullying targets.

Oh my god...you've admitted to the bullying! I must bring this up periodically over dozens of threads for the next two years!

[Ensign Steve]

quiet insane skeeve



Okay SnugglePumpkin. :beloved:

[ChuckF]

lol @ Mincin' Beave

[Deadlokd]

Day-um. Feel the burn.

[ms_ann_thrope]

Hey ms_gland_grope, I see you reading this thread. And you thanked the OP, so nut up and gtf in here. :deeznuts:I'm having difficulty coming up with any good name burns, so I thought I should stay out. I'm enjoying everyone else's hurtful creativity, though!

[BrotherMan]

Then gtfo gag_n_throat. :cbird:

[Qingdai]

Blubberman, is that you?

[BrotherMan]

Yes, Dingdong, it's me. You were expecting, maybe CluckU?

[Qingdai]

MMmmm. That name burn makes me sound like a tasty cake.

SisterWoman.

[BrotherMan]

omgus

[Qingdai]

Something about that last post reminded me of your mom.

:think:

[BrotherMan]

This just in, Wangai gets blow jobs from the dead!
:reporter:

[Kael]

As leader of the Clique of the Close-Minded I hearby fully endorse this thread and all its content. Take heed Clique members. I expect this extremely educational material to be fully integrated into our mocking process by the next meeting.

[ChuckF]

gtfo Fael.

[Kael]

C'mon, FhuckC, if you can't do better than that you might as well leave the Clique right now.

[Farren]

Gotfleas 'n Sad, Minge-Die, Blubberman, Wael, Bledcock, Yuk Deaf, Gay Hell-Zoo, Errormore, Rimslime Steve, Flingcod, Wut Sir?, Little Miss Poo Cyst, Small 'Un, Baby Pee, Lice o' Fur and Pants Narrans, a sterling effort! But there is still much you have to learn, grasshoppers!

[Petra]

Um, that came out wrong.
That's what your mother said after the doctor took you out of her, Fling pie.

:hyper: How'd I do? How'd I do? Too much too soon? Damn my extra-credit-craving, shiny-red-apple-leaving, teacher's-pet eyes. :kickscan:


Woah, lipius doofus did good! :bow:

[Pan Narrans]

Pants Narrans

Is that the best you can do, Fappin'?

[Farren]

Oh, I'm just getting warmed up Pinhead Runnypants

[ChuckF]

Um, that came out wrong.
That's what your mother said after the doctor took you out of her, Fling pie.

:hyper: How'd I do? How'd I do? Too much too soon? Damn my extra-credit-craving, shiny-red-apple-leaving, teacher's-pet eyes. :kickscan:


Woah, lipius doofus did good! :bow:
Welcome to the thread Putrid and/or Pootra.

[Sock Puppet]

Is there a reason you can't decide on Poontang's nameburn, ChechnyanFuck?

[ChuckF]

Is there a reason you can't decide on Poontang's nameburn, ChechnyanFuck?
Yeah I'm kinda busy fucking your mom atm Sick Bucket.

Aside to Sick Bucket: I enjoy that your name burn is simultaneously racist hater, comments on terrorism, and incorporates my interest in Russia!

[LadyShea]

Is there a reason you can't decide on Poontang's nameburn, ChechnyanFuck?

Nice race hatin' Cock Loveit

[Dingfod]

Did you know it's Megatroid's birthday?

[Sock Puppet]

Shouldn't that be Murgatroid, Dingleberry?

Nice race hatin' Cock LoveitWhy thank you, LousyLay.

[Dingfod]

Murgatroid, Megatroid, whatever, Pup Socketroid.

[Al Terego]

Who wants to do me?

[ChuckF]

Who wants to do me?
Nobody. Not even Sock's mom.

[Dingfod]

Who wants to do me?
Nobody. Not even Sock's mom.Your mom.

[Al Terego]

Who wants to do me?
Nobody. Not even Sock's mom.Your mom.Yours.

[BrotherMan]

Your mom's sock.

[Watser?]

Your sock's mom's sock.

[Adam]

Less wanking into socks, more name burning, kthxbai.

[Al Terego]

Your mom's sock.

Your sock's mom's sock.

Less wanking into socks, more name burning, kthxbai.kthxbai!

[Adam]

Good show, Al Terrorist-o!

[Ensign Steve]

MOAR LIEK AL QAEDA AMIRITE
:loud:

[Al Terego]

Good show, Al Terrorist-o!Good one, Adumb.

MOAR LIEK AL QAEDA AMIRITE
:loud:Get back in the kitchen and put your burkha back on, Inside Steed.

[Dingfod]

GTFO, All Terrible.

[Deadlokd]

I thought it was Megatards birthday. :chin:

But then I vaguely remember that we don't use that word around here any more.

[Dingfod]

I thought it was Megatards birthday. :chin:

But then I vaguely remember that we don't use that word around here any more.You don't.

[Kael]

As I recall, it offended someone with a mentally handicapped child, which I am willing to accommodate but still think is rather retarded gay lame fuck I want my euphemisms back.

[Deadlokd]

Yah, it was Julie and I am willing to accommodate her wishes. But yes, I like the euphemisms too.

[Petra]

Welcome to the thread Putrid and/or Pootra.

That's so lame. I used to call myself Putrid Angel back in my high school days when I wrote really bad punk poetry.

Gawd, you're such an aeolist, Upchuck Frotteur (which is French for you're a bastard).

[ChuckF]

As I recall, it offended someone with a mentally handicapped child, which I am willing to accommodate but still think is rather retarded gay lame fuck I want my euphemisms back.
Then quit your faggoty whining and use them.

[ChuckF]

Welcome to the thread Putrid and/or Pootra.

That's so lame. I used to call myself Putrid Angel back in my high school days

b/c of how awful your vagoo smells?

[Petra]

b/c of how awful your vagoo smells?

Well, duh! I am your mom, ChunderousFustilug.

:pms:

[beyelzu]

who knew that chucks mom was puta?


oh wait we all did.


I get bonus points for foriegn language burns right?

[Smilin]

Your mom's Cock.

:fixed:

[Dingfod]

Your mom's Cock.

:fixed::fixed:

[Farren]

Your mom's Cock.

:fixed::fixed:

fuxed

[BrotherMan]

wtf, Barren? That's not even a name burn!

[Farren]

Is too, Bummer Cam, you just don't read carefully enough. And "Barren"? That's almost as lame as your dick!

[BrotherMan]

I can't name burn you, Puggen, your vicious pack of wild toy pit bulls might come and maul me.

[Farren]

OMG you truly are a bhai chod.

Extra points for swears in one of India's 11 official languages

[ChuckF]

Extra points for swears in one of India's 11 official languages
Then everybody that has cursed in English gets extra points.

[Dingfod]

OMG you truly are a bhai chod.

Extra points for swears in one of India's 11 official languagesNot so fast there, Gandhi.