Saturday Night in the Gay Bar

[The Lone Ranger]

So, Sarah and I went to a gay bar Saturday evening. An acquaintance of ours is one of the performers, so we went to see the show. Quite an experience, I must admit.

First impression: How do people stand the noise?
Fortunately, I had planned ahead, and I brought some cotton and stuffed it into my ears. Even so, the music volume (apparently set on "11") was such that it really bothered me, and it was simply impossible to have a conversation without leaning up to your target and yelling in his or her ear. We stayed for about 2 hours, and I honestly don't think I could have taken it for much longer. Had I not been wearing the cotton, I think I'd have been driven outside by the din within minutes.

Seriously, is there some obscure law requiring that bars play their music at absolutely deafening levels, making conversation absolutely impossible?


Second impression: I'd forgotten how difficult it is to breathe when the atmosphere consists of approximately 40% nitrogen, 10% oxygen, and 50% cigarette smoke. Ugh!



The show consisted of various drag queens lip-synching to music and dancing provocatively. Most of them were quite enthusiastic, and some of them made amazingly convincing women. Some of them . . . did not.

The language and routines were incredibly raunchy, but that wasn't really unexpected. We sat well away from the stage, which was a good thing. People who sat closer to the stage often wound up being incorporated into the dancers' routines. Several male and female spectators got lap dances (some didn't seem entirely pleased), and some of the spectators were quite openly groped by the dancers. So far, so good, but one young woman was hauled up onto the stage and subjected to a groping that included the dancer putting his (her?) hands well into her shirt and pants, and would certainly have gotten him arrested for sexual assault under just about any other circumstances. A male patron got almost exactly the same treatment, so there was balance.

I think I'd have put up with a quick kiss with good grace. I'd probably have tolerated a lap dance. But after I saw what they did to some of the people whom they pulled up onto the stage, had one of the dancers tried to pull me up onto the stage, he would have experienced . . . problems.



All in all, it was actually quite an interesting experience. Definitely something new. I'm not planning to go back anytime soon, though.

Cheers,

Michael

[Godless Dave]

Earplugs are better than cotton. I can't wear them, myself, as it changes the tone of the music too much. You can get disposable foam earplugs for less than a dollar at many hardware stores.

[Dingfod]

Maybe you should try one of the many different Musician's Filtered Ear Plugs (http://www.earinc.com/p2-specialty-musician.php)

[livius drusus]

I have to say I'm pretty much way over drag shows. I don't like the liberties taken with the audience, and to tell the whole truth, I don't like drag. I don't think it's a tribute to womanhood, which is an apologetic I've heard a lot, and I don't think man in dress = funny, which is apparently some kind of conventional comedy wisdom.

I'm with you on the decible hell too, Michael. It's one thing to not be able to hear yourself think at a concert, but in places where theoretically there might be socializing going on -- ie, clubs -- I hate having to scream in someone's ear to be (mis)heard.

What were Sarah's impressions of the evening?

[viscousmemories]

Seriously, is there some obscure law requiring that bars play their music at absolutely deafening levels, making conversation absolutely impossible?
Yep, that's the law. Nightclubs are definitely the domain of purely superficial interaction.

Second impression: I'd forgotten how difficult it is to breathe when the atmosphere consists of approximately 40% nitrogen, 10% oxygen, and 50% cigarette smoke. Ugh!
That never bothered me when I was a smoker or shortly after I quit, and only a couple months after I quit I moved to California, where smoke-filled environments are essentially non-existent. So I'm not really sure how I'd handle it now.

I've never been to a drag show but I'm sure it'd be fun. I'm totally with you though that I wouldn't be at all comfortable with being manhandled :giggle: on stage, and I can't believe they went as far as you say with the woman they dragged up there.

[wei yau]

Seriously, is there some obscure law requiring that bars play their music at absolutely deafening levels, making conversation absolutely impossible?
Yep, that's the law. Nightclubs are definitely the domain of purely superficial interaction.


In a nightclub or danceclub, I could almost understand the need for deafening music. But, I've seen this happen even at regular hangout bars.

I end up wanting to go to bars in hotels. They tend to be quieter, though pricier.

[The Lone Ranger]

I have to say I'm pretty much way over drag shows. I don't like the liberties taken with the audience, and to tell the whole truth, I don't like drag. I don't think it's a tribute to womanhood, which is an apologetic I've heard a lot, and I don't think man in dress = funny, which is apparently some kind of conventional comedy wisdom.
I must admit that I didn't see anything at all funny about seeing men in dresses and high heels. Maybe I just don't "get it" though. A few of them would have made very good-looking women indeed. A number of them wouldn't have been mistaken for a woman by a blind person at 20 paces, on the other hand. But none of them struck me as funny.

Most people seemed to be quite enjoying the show though, so I guess it's all to the good. I found it interesting that the majority of the audience members seemed to be women, and almost everyone sitting in the first two rows (closest to the stage, and thus most likely to become part of the show) was female.

I got the distinct impression that the draw for an awful lot of people was the shock/naughtiness factor. You got to see people doing things that would be considered downright shocking -- if not criminal -- in "normal" society, and some spectators even got to participate.


What were Sarah's impressions of the evening?
Actually, I think she enjoyed it much more than I did. This was her third attendance (though she says it'll probably be her last). Partly, that's because she knows one of the performers, whereas I've only met him (her?) a couple of times.

To me, it was pretty much a case of, "Okay, that was interesting. Now I can cross it off my list of things to do."



I've never been to a drag show but I'm sure it'd be fun. I'm totally with you though that I wouldn't be at all comfortable with being manhandled on stage, and I can't believe they went as far as you say with the woman they dragged up there.
Sarah and I were both somewhat shocked by that. I wasn't in the best position to see absolutely everything that went on, but several dancers put their hands down the front of women's shirts on occasion and/or down the back of women's (and men's) pants. Mostly, this was done very quickly, presumably for shock value. But in the case of the one girl who was brought up onto stage, things went much further. Perhaps it had been arranged beforehand, but while she didn't get visibly angry or try to escape, she sure seemed to be quite embarrassed by the whole thing.

Of course, people sitting in the front row must surely expect things like that to happen if they have any familiarity with the place -- and I noticed that before the show started, people were jockeying for position, trying to get as close to the stage as possible. Even so, I was more than a little surprised at how far it went.


Afterward, "Jim" (our acquaintance) actually headed in my direction, though I have no idea if he was aiming for me. In any event, I gave him a look that would probably have instantly frozen the core of a main sequence star and he changed direction.

All in all, an interesting evening, to be sure!

Cheers,

Michael

[Bella]

I get groped more in gay bars than I do in regular bars. I wonder what that means...

I hate drag shows because I'm always left wondering "why the fuck can't MY stomach look like that?"

[Ensign Steve]

If you had that much testosterone in you, it would look like that!

[Clutch Munny]

If you had that much testosterone in you, it would look like that!

Huh. I've got no shortage of it, and the only six-pack in evidence is one I drink from.

[Beth]

I hate drag shows because I'm always left wondering "why the fuck can't MY stomach look like that?"
I know! Sickening, the queens look like hotter women than the real women do. Anyway, I've only seen a few shows and I have to say that I loved them. I adore some queens, some are as bitchy as the bitchiest women I know.

[Sweetie]

I've been meaning to check out a gay bar once in my life at least.

The only thing I've ever heard about the ones around here is from my cousin who goes with her friends or used to. All she said was that most who go there or those on the dance floor have no concept of the idea of "personal space," lol which is consistent with your relayed experience.

[livius drusus]

the queens look like hotter women than the real women do.

Actually, this relates to why I don't like drag. It feels more than a little patronizing to me: I'm a "better" woman than you are. Meanwhile, the notion of womanhood being advanced is one entirely constructed out of two-dimensional archetypes writ large.

I know, I know... I should lighten up.