How many Complete Twats does it take to change a lightbulb?

[Petra]

A: One and a gazillion!

One to break the 'retired' bulb from it's metal top thingy in the socket in the ceiling fixture, and then the whole of the internets to advise Complete Twat on what to do next!

:cellphon:

[Kael]

Well, there's the ole' potato trick, though you can actually use a number of vegetables. Or you could kill the breaker and use pliers or something.

[Doctor X]

You have to ask ChuckF. . . .

--J.D.

[Petra]

Well, there's the ole' potato trick, though you can actually use a number of vegetables. Or you could kill the breaker and use pliers or something.

What potato/vege trick? Can't find any pliers, though I know I have some somewhere....

[Petra]

You have to ask ChuckF. . . .

--J.D.

ChuckF, despite hs "alleged" omnicompetence, cannot help me now. It seems. :sadcheer:

[Kael]

Well, usually when you break a typical lighbulb off the cap there's still bits of glass left sticking out. You find a potato or other handy vegetable that will fit and press it onto the broken glass and cap. You now have something you can grip and turn attached to the cap stuck in the socket and can now unscrew it.

(preemptive :bunnythrust: in all the appropriate places)

[Pan Narrans]

(preemptive :bunnythrust: in all the appropriate places)

:bunnythrust:

[Doctor X]

You have to ask ChuckF. . . .

ChuckF, despite hs "alleged" omnicompetence, cannot help me now. It seems. :sadcheer:

Chuck's Mom is always open to help.

--J.D.

[ceptimus]

Switch the power off at the main breaker - vegetables can conduct.

[Kael]

Yeah, that's always a good idea.

[godfry n. glad]

Actually, if you are sure that the electricity to the outlet is off at the switch, you can safely remove it with a pair of pliers. I find needlenose pliers work best, opened inside the base. Plasticized handles will help buffer you just in case you guessed wrong on the electricity to the outlet, and it is on. Just don't touch anything conductive...or shut off the power at the main breaker (do not attempt to do this at night, it will impede the eventual replacement of the bulb).

[erimir]

You can change a lightbulb using your twat? :shocked:

[Kael]

Now that would be a neat trick.

[Dingfod]

How many twists of the twat would it take?

[Petra]

As talented and marvelous as I am, I am unable to change a lightbulb with my otherwise clever vagina. :sadcheer:


So I did the smart thing and called my dad over to risk his life changing my bulb. The operation was a success. Just thought you'd like to know. :cheer:

[Doctor X]

So are you implying you can leave a man tongue-tied?

--J.D.

[Petra]

So are you implying you can leave a man tongue-tied?

--J.D.

With twenty twists of the twat, to wit and to woo, sure!

[Doctor X]

Knot . . . that there is anything wrong with twat.

--J.D.

[mickthinks]

How many twists of the twat would it take?
Depends on the twattage—40, 60 or 100 Twats.

:idea2:

[Dingfod]

↑ should know.

[mickthinks]

↑ can talk

[Naru]

:^: I can use arrows too, bitches.

[JoeP]

Switch the power off at the main breaker - vegetables can conduct.

omg. We have dancing vegetable smilies :carrot: and killing vegetable smilies :killermango: and even vegetables dancing to music :saloon: ... but we don't have any conducting vegetable smilies.

Need.

[Adam]

:^: Broke the arrow chain

[SharonDee]

:larrow: gtfo

[Ensign Steve]

:V: No u.

[ChuckF]

God you people are such pussies.

This is you:

Be sure to turn the electricity off!
:whine:

Switch the main power off at the breaker!
:whine:

Waaaah, I need to go to the vagina doctor because I'm a huge pussy!
:whine:

Be a man and just tear the bulb out with your bare hands.

[Ensign Steve]

Be a man and just tear the bulb out with your dick.

:fixed:

[ChuckF]

Yeah if you want to do it the Australian way.

[Miisa]

The first two were not :^:, they were ↑

[Adam]

↑ Arrow pedant

[Miisa]

:V: Yeah? Well, so's your face.

[livius drusus]

:^: is better endowed than ↑.

[Miisa]

It's how you use ↑ that matters.

[livius drusus]

It really isn't. ↑ needs to see a urologist or something. I mean, that ^ is seriously wonky.

[BrotherMan]

:V: :bunnythrust:

[Dingfod]

→Say what?

[Miisa]

:^: looks like it has priapism.

[Miisa]

OMG! I just checked on a different browser, and it is a different symbol in Firefox than on my Opera! Just understood what you are all on about. :lol:

[JoeP]

<marquee direction="up" behavior="alternate" height="40px" scrolldelay="10" scrollamount="4">↑</marquee>
<marquee direction="up" behavior="alternate" height="40px" scrolldelay="10" scrollamount="4">:^:</marquee>

[Smilin]

(showoff)

[Kael]

:^: Abuse ITT

[Smilin]

How many lightbulbs can you change with your twat?

[JoeP]

www.xxxlightbulbinsertion.com (http://www.freethought-forum.com/forum/showpost.php?p=731451&postcount=43)