Who here are parents?

[LiveToRide]

I was wondering who here were parents. Probably most of the regulars know who has kids, but as a fairly new arrival, I was curious. So. Who's got kids, and tell a favorite story about them.

My son, Joshua, will be 16 in June. He has always given me shit about smoking. Once when he was about 5, we were at the park. It was time to go home, and I called him to me, flicking away my cigarette butt as he came running up. (I didn't smoke with him in the car.) He stopped short about 10 feet from me, planted his fists on his hips, glared at me and said, "Not only do you smoke, but you're a LITTERBUG, too!!!"
I made the mistake of telling him that story a while back, and now whenever I flick a butt away, he mutters "Litterbug." And now he's too big for me to kick his ass! :lmao:
I also have 2 soon-to-be step kids, but I'll let Bullet tell about them. Let's hear your story!

[Dingfod]

Two daughters:

Laney, 24 this month, lives with her son, Dylan, 19 months, at grandparent's in Texas and has been an exemplary Supermegabucks box store employee for the past 8 months or so, recovering from an abusive relationship with her baby's father and a meth addiction. Laney wants me to buy her a Mitsubishi Eclipse, but I don't want to buy her any car, having already given her five or six cars over the past 8 years.

Roxy, 17, a Junior in high school, plays flute and piccolo in band and is on the state 4A championship color guard, or flag corps. Roxy is a Ford Ranger pickup truck with a Paint Horse sticker in the back window kind of girl.

[godfry n. glad]

Sorry... child-free.

[Ensign Steve]

Not sorry...child-free. ;)

[SharonDee]

One daughter, 19. She's jobless, skill-less, living out her last month's rent, hoping to get the job she's interviewing for tomorrow. But she's blissfully happy to not be living in my house, where she'd be expected to curtail her social life and become a productive member of society.

"Young lady, when I was 19 I was in tech school, learning the trade that allowed me to raise you practically all by myself. Git off the pot!" (Mom's a mean ol' bitch, fer sure.)

[godfry n. glad]

Roxy is a Ford Ranger pickup truck with a Paint Horse sticker in the back window kind of girl.

She sounds like a sensible and creative girl. What's the significance of the "Paint Horse sticker in the back window"?

[Dingfod]

Roxy is a Ford Ranger pickup truck with a Paint Horse sticker in the back window kind of girl.

She sounds like a sensible and creative girl. What's the significance of the "Paint Horse sticker in the back window"?Foxy Roxy rides Howie, a registered Pinto-Paint horse, in Western Pleasure and English riding competitions. She has a crapload of ribbons to show for it and has even won small amounts of money at fairs.

What's the difference between Paint and Pinto, you might ask?
Paint is by breeding, with at least some Paint horse blood.
Pinto is by color only. If a colored horse of any breed has at least a certain number of square inches of white on it, it can be registered as a Pinto.

What is the advantage to registering as both Pinto and Paint?
Twice as many ribbons and trophies to be won. Actually, the horse was registered Paint by birth and registered as Pinto on merit of color and Pinto competitions aren't quite as high dollar or as competitive as the Paint Horse Association contests.

[godfry n. glad]

I'm a prospective step-parent and a former secondary school teacher. I love to hear parents talk about their teenagers.

If I play my cards right, I'll get to go from child-free to grandfather. Can you beat that with a stick?

[Beth]

I'm a prospective step-parent and a former secondary school teacher. I love to hear parents talk about their teenagers.

If I play my cards right, I'll get to go from child-free to grandfather. Can you beat that with a stick?Wow, godfry, that's great. :yup:

My son is 12 and drives me nuts. Already acts like a teen. He has a genius I.Q., a superior attitude, and tries to push to the very limit. So far, he still is doing great in school.

[godfry n. glad]

Roxy is a Ford Ranger pickup truck with a Paint Horse sticker in the back window kind of girl.

She sounds like a sensible and creative girl. What's the significance of the "Paint Horse sticker in the back window"?Foxy Roxy rides Howie, a registered Pinto-Paint horse, in Western Pleasure and English riding competitions. She has a crapload of ribbons to show for it and has even won small amounts of money at fairs.

What's the difference between Paint and Pinto, you might ask?
Paint is by breeding, with at least some Paint horse blood.
Pinto is by color only. If a colored horse of any breed has at least a certain number of square inches of white on it, it can be registered as a Pinto.

What is the advantage to registering as both Pinto and Paint?
Twice as many ribbons and trophies to be won. Actually, the horse was registered Paint by birth and registered as Pinto on merit of color and Pinto competitions aren't quite as high dollar or as competitive as the Paint Horse Association contests.

Kewl.

I may be stepping into a similar scene. My friend's step-daughter shows horses professionally. I'm not quite sure what that means. There are professional shows that are frequent enough and pay enough that somebody can make a living "showing" horses? Is that what they mean? I gather she works with some "stable". I assume that's the corporate entity that employs her.

Like, mr. city kid knows squat about horse farms. :slickhick:

I've never really been impressed with horses. I like asses.

godfry

(there it is folks...a direct quote)

[Sauron]

Sorry... child-free.

childfry n. glad?
:giggle: :giggle: :giggle:

[beyelzu]

I am the father of my own despair.


does that count? :tmgrin:


no chilluns for me.

[Roland98]

2 kiddos, 5 and 3. Aurora is much like me, little Type A--precocious, perfectionist, never satisfied. Her teachers wish every kid in class was like her. Zavier is the opposite in many ways: rambunctious, no attention span, very mechanical (always taking his toys apart and putting them back together--though he'll hardly touch toys like Lego). Currently their favorite song is Fifty Cent's "Disco Inferno." (http://www.letssingit.com/?http://www.letssingit.com/50-cent-disco-inferno-dq1cbts.html) Luckily you can't make out most of the lyrics because his pronunciation is so terrible, but the chorus repeats "shake that ass, girl". Which, of course, they recently sang in front of our uber-Catholic landlords. :bag: They're pretty fun when they're not embarrassing the hell outta me, though.

[godfry n. glad]

At least it's quiet...er.

Which is not necessarily always a good thing. Ahem.

[Sweetie]

Alexis - nine. Very tall for her age, in the top 90th percentile of kids her age. She's goofy, she's bright. Can't think of any specific stories though. Good-natured, responsible, pays attention to alot of things, love to learn.

Mariah - six. Interesting creature, different, my Mom calls her "touched." I think she's highly intelligent in an odd way, in a creative and highly perceptive way. Haven't quite figured her out yet. She's a fierce and timid little thing, it's an interesting combination, she's a lot like me.

Jordan - five. Smart little shit. Got alot of things figured out, independent, strong-willed and stubborn. Highly intelligent, if he plays his cards right he could do very well in the future and it helps that he is a particularily good looking boy.

[CARLA]

:yup: I have a 36 year old daughter, and a 7 year old grand daughter. Both live with me now. They have been here for almost 2 years. I had to rescue them both from UTAH, and a good for nothing husband who put all their money up his nose. Went and got them with my sisters suburban packed what we could and came home all in less than 24 hours.

My daughter is now in College, she will be a CNA after her Internship the end of this month. They will place her in a job. Hopefully that will get her on her feet and into her own place.

My Grand daughter NIKKI was born with Club feet, and a Club hand. That was the first thing we took care of here at Childrens Hospital. She has under gone 6 seperate surgeries to correct her feet and left hand. Today she is doing well, in 1st grade.. She is a handful but having her here is a HOOT.. :wink: :wink:

Parents and Grand Parents will do anything for their children.. that's what it's all about.. :yup:

[Trinity]

I am the mother of a brilliant six year old boy. He is also most beautiful, and the light of my life.

[Beth]

I might add that my son is a brilliant athelete. He has my body shape, minus the female fat. Long limbs, broad shoulders. He is absolutely gorgeous and girls massively crush on him to his dismay.

My daughter is nine. She is precocious beyond words. Slutney Spears is her current role model to my dismay. The goal of her and her two best friend's lives is to become a "slut bag whore" (their words) like their pop idols and to form a group. They are already writing songs. My daughter is very skilled at picking up a guitar and making up brilliant songs. She plays naturally in a way that I could only dream of. My daughter acts more like my husband in many ways, including in her love of food and ketchup and sauces. She is semi-vegetarian, has my husband's and his mother's build.

Both my kids are very adept at the guitar. my son jams on the electric, my daughter on the classical. They fight like cats and dogs, but join minds on ways that they can fuck with my mind. They love playing practical jokes on me. Both of my kids are above level in height, probably because they have a daddy who is 6'2 1/2" and a mommy who is 5'9". They are both extremely gifted and they, I swear, taught themselves to read by the age of around 3 1/2. I still get credit for the reading, but no one believes me when I tell them that they taught themselves.

My son, tried to carry his sister around the house when she was a newborn, just a few days old. He was two and a half and I had the fright of my life when I saw him dragging his sister into the kitchen between his legs. I had just gotten home from the hospital about and hour earlier and was trying to get dinner made. Baby's head was drooping, eyes wide awake, son's arms supporting her torso. My son taught his sister how to climb out of her crib at six months showing her how to use her toes as grips to climb up the crib rails. I had to soon move the bed next to the crib so that when she got out, she would fall on the mattress and not on the floor. Anyhoo, my life has really never had rest or been the same since my son taught my daughter how to avoid her prison bed of mommy's reprieve.

Oh, I forgot to mention my kids doing gymnastics on the closet rails or how they would climb up the clothes to get on the top shelf of the closet. Or how my son, at five, decided to be some freaking super hero and jumped off the top bunk of his bunk bed and thought he could swing on the light fixture like tarzan. He ripped the damn thing out of the wall. Ah or how I was sick with the flu, had both kids in bed with me, and woke to my son building a fire in the carpet in the center of the room. I don't know where the matches came from, but he thought he could have a bonfire like he saw in some movie.

I had better quit. I could go on all freaking day.

Where was Nanny 911 when I needed her?

[Beth]

*Sigh* I just admitted to what a horrible mother I was and probably still am.

[MooseIBe]

No kids here as of yet. Maybe one day :)

[inland wave]

*Sigh* I just admitted to what a horrible mother I was and probably still am.
Beth, I can tell you this from experience, your not a bad mother.
I have some stories that would curl your toes.

[inland wave]

Roxy is a Ford Ranger pickup truck with a Paint Horse sticker in the back window kind of girl.

She sounds like a sensible and creative girl. What's the significance of the "Paint Horse sticker in the back window"?Foxy Roxy rides Howie, a registered Pinto-Paint horse, in Western Pleasure and English riding competitions. She has a crapload of ribbons to show for it and has even won small amounts of money at fairs.

What's the difference between Paint and Pinto, you might ask?
Paint is by breeding, with at least some Paint horse blood.
Pinto is by color only. If a colored horse of any breed has at least a certain number of square inches of white on it, it can be registered as a Pinto.

What is the advantage to registering as both Pinto and Paint?
Twice as many ribbons and trophies to be won. Actually, the horse was registered Paint by birth and registered as Pinto on merit of color and Pinto competitions aren't quite as high dollar or as competitive as the Paint Horse Association contests.

Kewl.

I may be stepping into a similar scene. My friend's step-daughter shows horses professionally. I'm not quite sure what that means. There are professional shows that are frequent enough and pay enough that somebody can make a living "showing" horses? Is that what they mean? I gather she works with some "stable". I assume that's the corporate entity that employs her.

Like, mr. city kid knows squat about horse farms. :slickhick:

I've never really been impressed with horses. I like asses.

godfry

(there it is folks...a direct quote)

Yes, there are show/events that pay big money. These kids, adults are very good at what they do and have aquired major company sponsorship to be able to compete. The professional shows/events are very expensive. Only one person walks away with the money prize, sometimes they will have token amounts for 2nd and 3rd place.
I never went as far as getting corporate sponsorship for Roxanne when expenses were adding up, but sure thought about it. She rides for fun now. If and when she rides at all. I have noticed that when she gets really depressed she saddles up. It does her good.

[Shake]

Trayton - he's 4 and recently going through a real stubborn phase. Not that he's not always stubborn, but he's just been really testing limits lately. It gets kind of frustrating. Otherwise, he's a great kid. Big for his age: 43" and nearly 50 lbs at the last doctor's visit.

He's smart, but not potty-trained quite yet. Others can't get that there's really no correlation between intelligence and being potty trained. He's nearly 100% at the house, but has no interest to try anywhere else. Well, on his potty anyway. Oh well, everyone who's had kids at that age tells us he'll get it.

He knows all the major makes of cars ("that's a Ford police car"), remembers what most people he's met drive, can spell roughly 100 words, can count to 100, and knows several state capitals.

But he's weird too. Hates praise and likes to dip foods together that you wouldn't think go: pizza in ketchup, cheez-its in applesauce, french fries in applesauce, etc. But he's mine and I love him to pieces! You can see him in the gallery, here (http://www.freethought-forum.com/forum/gallery/files/5/5/normal_traysitgc.jpg). That's from our Vegas trip last year.

[Godless Dave]

Beth, why do you say your kids antics make you a bad mother? You put the fire out and told him not to do it again, right?

[livius drusus]

My dad burned my upper arm with boiling water once. It was a total and complete accident. My dad is a great father just as you are a fine mother, Beth.

[Darren]

Neil, 14 months - just learning to walk and talk. Loves people, hates bedtime.

[Petra]

Zoë Anaïs, girl child, 11 years old since Feb 16th.



Hey, Beth - you think you're a bad mother? Try this: Zoë used to have a scooter when she was about 8 or 9. One day when she came in to see me after she'd been scooting around the neighbourhood with the kids next door, I gasped and said, "Zoë! You're all lopsided! Gasp! You've been scooting using the same leg all the time haven't you?"

"Yes", she said all confused and innocent like.

"Oh, no!" I said, all concerned and innocent like. "You have to alternate your scooting leg from time to time, kiddo, or one leg will grow much longer than the other. Oh, my - turn around, Zoë, I want to see if it's not too bad."

So she slowly turned around, and walked away from me and walked toward me and all that stuff.

"Gasp! Zoë it's started to happen to you - you're getting way too lopsided. We have to fix this!"

"Gasp!" said Zoë, looking all worried.

She then went out and tried to rectify the problem by scooting with the other leg, but she's so left-handed (legged?) the she kept losing her balance and falling off while I fell about laughing.

Then she twigged what was happening and tried to beat me up. :D


Poor kid. She really lucked out scoring me as her mum!. :giggle:

[xavierOnassis]

My daughter Erika turns 18 next week... I feel like I'm abou to throw her off the deep end od the pool without ever really teaching her how to swim...