Best/Worst Presents

[livius drusus]

Inspired by recent vacuum cleaner and DVD bliss, I'd love to hear about the best and worst presents y'all have ever given or received. :apresent:

In the best presents received category, first I have an intricate play-within-a-play double surprise party decoy system Blake set up when I demanded a surprise party one year and then proceeded to scrutinize his every move for hints. Both parties were a blast and they both totally took me by surprise. The second one had me doubled over in total shock for 10 minutes. The decoy worked like a damned charm, I tell you whut.

Then, from the loving brilliance of my mother: The Selected Early Works of livius drusus*, a privately printed collection of my writing, from letters to the tooth fairy when I was 4 to college papers on The Wife of Bath, that my mom had collected over the decades, had beautifully bound by a local Maine artisan and gave me for graduation from college. There are 4 extant copies that I know of: one with me, one in my parents' bookshelf, one backup copy in their attic, and one in the Library of Congress. :)

One of the best presents I ever gave was a portable wooden shoe-polishing kit complete with brushes, polish, chamois, and a handle with rubber treads which doubles as a rack for optimal shoe positioning. I found it at an estate sale, had to snatch it out of the hands of someone who tried to rip it off from the stash I had set aside at the cash register, paid a princely 20 dollars for it and gave it to my dad, who polishes his shoes every month (army habits die hard) and up until then had used a garbage bag to keep all his gear.

I had another great success just last night, when I gave my bestest hard-partying friend and his equally hard-partying fiance the Showgirls collector's edition DVD complete with shotglasses, deck of cards, and the ultramoney Pin the Pasties on the Stripper game (comes with velour blindfold, tasseled pasties on suction cups and glossy poster of Elizabeth Berkely topless). Unfortunately, they made us watch the movie with them after we got back from sushi, but it was worth the torture just to see them freak out when they opened it. :yup:


*not actual name

[Dingfod]

...and one in the Library of Congress. :eek:
That is so cool.

One of the best presents I ever gave was a portable wooden shoe-polishing kit complete with brushes, polish, chamois,...I won one of those shoe polish kits at a company picnic when I was 12. I still have it. Damn useful... if you polish shoes at all. Many people don't.

One of the other best gifts I ever gave was for a community Xmas party. We were supposed to bring a pound of something, gift wrapped, for the Xmas present exchange. Since we didn't have but a few hours notice of this requirement, I couldn't think of what to package. A pound of spaghetti? That just didn't seem like a good one (although that was one of the gifts there given by someone else). Well, we had just moved there a few months before and still had a big roll of bubblewrap, the big kind with the 1" bubbles. I wrapped up about a pound of that, which was a package about 2 feet diameter and 2-1/2 feet long, far and away the largest package in the gift exchange. Being the largest, it was the first choice by the first recipient. It was the hit of the party. Almost everyone there was popping the bubblewrap bubbles for the better part of a half hour, laughing and enjoying themselves.

One year, my wife and I made quilts for everyone in both of our families. That was a big hit too. Most of these are still in use two decades later. The next few years after that she made photoalbums for everyone. She used to be like that.

The worst gift I ever got was from my in-laws, a WB cartoon Tasmanian Devil TV remote holder made from vinyl and fit over the arm of a chair. Damn ugly POS was relegated to the discard bin almost the same day.

The worst gift I ever gave was giving someone some ceramic knick-knack that someone else had given us the previous year. I hate that shit, but I know some people love it, so maybe it went to a loving home.

[LadyShea]

Lessee. Best received. I can think of two right off the bat

For my birthday a couple years back Frankie got me a Louis Vuitton purse...this was the best gift not so much because of the expense, but because he remembered me saying ONCE, like 10 years before, that I would like to have one some day. For him to keep that in his head all that time until we could afford such, and then to spend hours choosing one, just meant the world to me. On the same day he also had arranged a couples spa treatment and the Paris hotel...salt scrub, whirlpool with a platter of fruit and chocalate and juice, then an hour long side by side massage. Yeah that rocked

When Frankie and I got engaged, my mom gave us the engagement gift she had received from her mother 25 years prior, a complete set of vintage crystal bar stemware splattered with 18k gold. I had always loved the set growing up. It has champagne bowls and little cordials that you never see anymore.


Best given was a family affair. My dad had built a Corvette starting with the body of a 55 but doing everything else custom. It won a prize at the Super Chevy show and he was mentioned in a magazine for his innovations and creativity while keeping the car looking classic. We took a picture of the car to an airbrush artist and had it put on a nice jacket so he could wear it to shows. He had to leave the room because he almost cried.

I don't really think about worst gifts, because any gift is a nice thought. The only thing I can think of...my sister in law has this thing about buying all this country Christmas shit at craft shows and including it in our regular gift. I hate that crap.

[Lauri D]

Great thread liv!

Worst: On my 28th or 29th birthday, can't remember which, from my ex-husband - he went to the mall on his way to work, on the actual day, and bought a gift certificate to Macy's. "Uh, so you can buy some new work shoes or something..."

Best: Hmmm, there have been a few. This one http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:7UtIiisoVOIJ:http://www.flashflights.net/pix/beachbeetle.jpg
is a definite contender because it was totally unexpected and yet the perfect thing. Most. Fun. EVER!!! (from NS for my 31st birthday :) )

[Dingfod]

Holey Jayzuss, a gift certificate to Macy's? Gah! The dude should be shot, then hung, then killed again. Cretin. I'd have at least gotten you a two-for-one coupon for Chick-Fil-A to go with it.

[Ensign Steve]

I have Lauri a gift certificate to Macy's one year for Christmas.

[Lauri D]

Holey Jayzuss, a gift certificate to Macy's? Gah! The dude should be shot, then hung, then killed again. Cretin. I'd have at least gotten you a two-for-one coupon for Chick-Fil-A to go with it.
LOL... but we don't have those out here ;) In-N-Out woulda been good though...

I think LadyShea's example of the Vuitton purse hits the nail on the head... the thoughtfulness that goes into something means so much more than the cost or whatnot.

[Ensign Steve]

There's a Chik-fil-a in Torrance. I'll take you there next christmas to make up for last time, okay?

[Lauri D]

I have Lauri a gift certificate to Macy's one year for Christmas.
That's different though, you know, it's not that I don't like gift certificates or Macy's, it was moreso like he didn't put one moment of thought into it, if that makes any sense.

[Lauri D]

There's a Chik-fil-a in Torrance. I'll take you there next christmas to make up for last time, okay?
LOL! Silly girl :blush: But you can take me there anyway :D

[LadyShea]

I have Lauri a gift certificate to Macy's one year for Christmas.


I love gift certificates and my best friend and I have gone to them exclusively. Between friends, this is a perfect gift....spouses though?

The problem with lauri's ex here seems to be the complete lack of thought and imagination. If he gave her the GC and said "There is a fabulous dress I saw you would look great in but I wasn't sure which size" or something....it would have been a great gift. "Uh here, get some work shoes or something because I haven't paid any attention to what you want or need" isn't.

[Dingfod]

I'm just one of those guys that figured a wheelbarrow full of money was the perfect gift for any occasion.

[Lauri D]

I love gift certificates and my best friend and I have gone to them exclusively. Between friends, this is a perfect gift....spouses though?

The problem with lauri's ex here seems to be the complete lack of thought and imagination. If he gave her the GC and said "There is a fabulous dress I saw you would look great in but I wasn't sure which size" or something....it would have been a great gift. "Uh here, get some work shoes or something because I haven't paid any attention to what you want or need" isn't.
:yup:

Ooh I just thought of something, in the jerky boy's defense though (not really ;) ) one of my other "bests" was from him. For our first Christmas together, he got me the bar that resides in my living room. When we first started dating we had been in this furniture store and I pointed it out and mentioned that I had been lusting after it for about a year but couldn't justify spending the $. I was totally surprised and it's still my favorite piece of furniture.

[lisarea]

I don't understand gift certificates. Is it just to avoid appearing crass by giving money? Because to me, it says, "Here is some money to spend, but just so you don't go buying crack with it or something, I give it with the stipulation that you have to spend it at Sears."

I am stupid about a lot of things, though, so don't be mad at me if I'm misconstruing it.

Best gifts: ODB gave me a model of a human heart for my last birthday based on some dumbassed joke I told on II once and then forgot about. That thing makes me pretty happy. And this year, I was getting a new pair of shoes I really wanted, but they didn't get here in time, so he kept ordering me more shit, none of which came on time, so he had to buy me a cake and give me a card with a paper doll that punches out, so I could play with that, and Trevor had to take me to Target and buy me a CD. So I guess my best gift is slow, unreliable shipping combined with an irrational sense of duty. And my sister makes insane portraits and things as gifts. I have one of me that's, like, a box with a dirty little dollhead (me) spinning on a clock mechanism between heaven and hell.

Worst gift I've witnessed: My little brother got some baby book, like "learn your shapes" or something, when he was like 11. I think it was even made of soft plastic. You know, in case he decided to chew on it or something. He was mildly handicapped, but nothing close to retarded (he's finishing up his PhD right now), but some people relished every opportunity to establish their superiority by implying that he was.

[Lauri D]

Man, that sucks about the worst gift to your brother, Lisa! Very lame.

My take on the gift certificate thing is that it can be like "I know you like this store (or whatever establishment) so get something that will make you happy!" I personally like receiving them in that way, it's only annoying when it's so generic that you just know the person wasn't approaching it from that frame of mind.

Like, my ex-in-laws used to give me gift certificates to South Coast Plaza (one of the local malls here) which I actually found very thoughtful, because my MIL in particular knew that there were a lot of stores there I like, and also knew that her taste was so totally different than mine, that she wouldn't be able to pick out with any degree of certainty something that I would like. Although she did give me a gorgeous blue cashmere sweater one time...

I always appreciated the GC's from them though. It was like she knew she couldn't figure me out so just left it in my hands.

[Socratoad]

HHHmmmmmmm, gifts. Tis better to give than to receive. I love giving gifts but become embarrassed and verge upon a major anxiety attack when someone presents me with a gift. This state of affairs has always been so.

[Lauri D]

HHHmmmmmmm, gifts. Tis better to give than to receive. I love giving gifts but become embarrassed and verge upon a major anxiety attack when someone presents me with a gift. This state of affairs has always been so.
Howdy Toad!

I'm sort of the same way, though not to the extreme (anxiety and such) - but I definitely derive more pleasure from giving, and especially putting personal thought and attention into the process. However, this sometimes makes gift-giving occasions very difficult for me, because I agonize over just the right special thing. But then it's a great feeling when you have that "A-ha!" moment of JUST THE RIGHT THING that you know will make someone happy. :yup:

[Dingfod]

Ooh, I just thought of my personal worst gift I ever received, tops the Taz remote holder big time. For a Xmas gift, my paternal grandmother sent me some green double-knit polyester pants which smelled of mothballs. I'm sure she had bought them for 50 cents at a rummage or estate sale. They were something like a 60" waist and a 26" inseam and ugly as hell. While it appears I am approaching the round ball with a mouth physique now, at the time of this gift my pant size was 38" waist with a 32" inseam,

[Socratoad]

Hi Lauri
Gotta love that "aha" factor, cuz ya can just picture the look of joy on the face of the receiver.

[LadyXoc]

Best gift - my bf put shelves in my apartment when I first moved in and put all my gazillion books up for me, while I was at work one day. :love:
Worst gift - My mother used to send me used (as in wrinkled) religious tracts and episodes of the 700 Club she taped. On old VCR tapes. Do you think she was trying to tell me something? :wink:

[livius drusus]

Warren, the bubblewrap idea was just brilliant. Brilliant. Who doesn't love popping bubblewrap? That party must have been noisy as hell. I also really dig the quilt presents; I just can't even imagine how much work y'all must have put into it. How many quilts did you end up making, and how long did it take to make them all, if I may ask?

As for those polyester pants, what kind of human being fits into a 60" waist and a 26" inseam? It sounds like something :tiptoe: could wear.

LadyShea, I love the stemware story. Not only does it sound like a gorgeous set, but it means so much that they passed along something you've always treasured in honor of the same occasion for which they received them. My parents have the champage cups and cordials in their set too: they're awesome because you always get bubbles up your nose. :)

Lauri, that kite looks like happiness itself. Pretty, joyous colors and guaranteed enjoyment. I've never actually flown a kite, you know. I might just have to now.

lisarea, ODB just rules. He knows you so well it's almost eerie. It's not so eerie with your sister, of course, on account of she's actually known you your entire life.

LadyXoc, I can't even put a price on your bf's present. Infuckingvaluable. I bet they're really nice shelves too.

/me sighs dreamily

[LadyShea]

My best friend and I started the gift cert thing because shipping costs were killing us. For her birthday I sent her a Victoria's Secret because she mentioned needing new bras again (1-year old boob job so just settling into final size and shape). Sure, we could send cash, but the choice of GC can show some thought and ensures the person buys something for themselves rather than paying bills or buying groceries with it or whatever.

[Dingfod]

Warren, the bubblewrap idea was just brilliant. Brilliant. Who doesn't love popping bubblewrap? That party must have been noisy as hell.It sure was, for about 30 minutes.I also really dig the quilt presents; I just can't even imagine how much work y'all must have put into it. How many quilts did you end up making, and how long did it take to make them all, if I may ask?We made one each for my two brothers and two sisters, one each for our respective parents, and one for each of her brothers, for a total of 9. She made one for me too, so make that 10. They were not patchwork quilts so they didn't take all that much time, but I'd say we spent about a day on each one.

As for those polyester pants, what kind of human being fits into a 60" waist and a 26" inseam? It sounds like something :tiptoe: could wear.Like I said, a round ball with a mouth.

[Dingfod]

My best friend and I started the gift cert thing because shipping costs were killing us. For her birthday I sent her a Victoria's Secret because she mentioned needing new bras again (1-year old boob job so just settling into final size and shape). Sure, we could send cash, but the choice of GC can show some thought and ensures the person buys something for themselves rather than paying bills or buying groceries with it or whatever.Exactly. Last Xmas, I gave my mother a $100 gift certificate to JC Penny's, her favorite clothing, bedding and window-dressing store and my dad the same amount to Home Depot. I had absolutely no idea what to get them, they didn't have a lot of room and didn't really seem to need anything, plus they're like me in the distain for trinkets and bric-a-brac. If I had given them cash instead, they would've just frittered it away on daily expenses instead of indulging themselves.

[freemonkey]

I'm just one of those guys that figured a wheelbarrow full of money was the perfect gift for any occasion.
Yeah, baby. :beating:

My husband has been giving me cash as gifts lately, with the stipulation that I MUST NOT buy anything too practical with it. 'Cus I'm frugal, y'know.

One of the best gifts I ever got from his was one Valentines Day, he spent all day playing, singing & recording a song for me (it escapes me which song it was, something by The Kinks, maybe).

I can't be sure about this, but maybe the best gift I've given (to him) was a vintage Union Jack all the way from England that I managed to score on ebay.

[Adora]

Best: Money. Always money. Also, requested books or videogames rate pretty high as well. DVDs. And, heh, let's face it, if someone bought me a new stereo or a car, I'd love them forever. Sets of Derwent pencils used to be good, cept I use the computer mostly these days. I still have one of the lovely wooden boxes I got them in though. I love the look of it. You can probably buy your way into my pants with chocolate as well. And with bookstore gift-certificates.

Worst: Dresses. Not only is there the simple fact I do not ever, EVER, wear dresses, but I always seem to get them in flower patterns or colours that are so incredibly NOT ME. Nighties and underwear rate pretty highly on the worst scale as well. Buy me pyjamas and pants and whatever, it's all well and good. But not nighties or undies. I seem to get them a lot from relatives that live really really far away though. Fucken funny that. I also hate getting those typical "because I didn't know what else to get you and your female" gifts of scented candles, aromatherapy sets and "nice" bath sets with a loofah and stinky gel and all that shit. It just screams "I didn't really care much and didn't spend much time shopping for your gift". As someone who always tries hard with gifts, this shits me off to no end. I also don't like gifts that are too practical. I always think that a gift should have some "specialness" rating, unless specifically requested (like at weddings and stuff).

[Goliath]

I've never been mechanically inclined...in fact, I often tell people that I'm mechancially retarded. When I put together a bird house for my Jr. High shop class, there wasn't a single right angle to be found in the whole damn thing. Not one.

When I tried welding for shop class, I tried welding two plates of metal together side by side, but I kept getting the welding rods stuck in the metal...when I was done, I had a very weird looking abstract art sculpture (think of a very flat porcupine with lots of huge quills of varying lengths shooting out at various weird angles).

And when my mom told me to go outside to the shop to help my dad with whatever he was doing, it wouldn't take dad too long to send me back to the house, because 95% of the time, I was worthless as a helper.

So, when I was 8 or 9 years old, my parents had an idea to try to get me more tool/shop/mechanics oriented....

One of the first presents under the tree was a huge present! It was heavy, and it didn't make that much noise when I shook it...I had no idea what it was, but it must've been something big! The box was bigger than all of the packaging boxes for all the Transformers toys that I knew of..that one was a mystery.

Then, there were all other kinds of little to medium sized boxes! None of them made that much noise, either, but they seemed kinda heavy for their size. None of them were any of the standard Transformers toy box sizes.

Well, when xmas rolled around, I dug eagerly into these mysterious boxes!! The biggest box was....a toolbox. The other boxes contained a screwdriver, hammer, socket set, etc, etc, etc....other than a box of chocolate covered cherries, I didn't get anything fun on that xmas day.

The only good that came out of it was that my mom felt so guilty, she bought me some toys a day later. :D

[Scotty]

Best gift I have gotten? Hmm, tough one. In terms of longevity, I have a Spartus digital clock from, um, must be 1980-81 or earlier, it is the exact clock and sound you hear in the beginning of "The Tick" cartoon. I always get a shock when I watched The Tick and wondered why the alarm was going off.

I am such gift nerd, I like just small things received, like t-shirts that annoy other people (to a degree). Other then that I pick my own gifts and my wife buys them for me :) (case in point, S2000, G5, G4 laptop, she is a great wife!)

As for me, I like coming up with a good gift. It is of course something I would like to have for myself, so I never get somebody something, uh, crappy.

I think almost everybody in the family has a computer I have given them, and keep using it (the G3 upgraded to G4 for my nephew comes to mind, he likes that thing, especially with the keyboard attached to it).

I seem to be blanking on gifts I have given, oh well. We exchange names for the holidays, and I pulled rank (?) and got my sister who is going through chemo right now, selfish of me I guess. Oh well. My dime.

I do remember I got a gift that somebody didn't want, and that was my BIL who I got a japanese sword set. One of my other sisters liked it, so it went to her.

Oh, I gave my other BIL my '90 Eclipse Turbo, and he loves that car (I did too), runs like a champ even now (actually, I bought it in February of '89) no engine problems or turbo issues at all.

So, all I need to do now is buy Adora a car with a killer stereo with a DVD system with a PS2. I know how these things work.

I got diana the 4th season of the Simpsons on DVD and she just got it a few days ago, that was pretty cool.

-Scott

[livius drusus]

I can't believe I forgot to add my worst present. Actually, I'm sure I've gotten much worse, but this one stands our for sheer heinous uselessness.

My mom, bless her heart, loves silver geegaws of all kinds. If it's silver, she loves it. Occasionally, she confuses me for her. A few birthdays ago, this manifested itself in a sterling silver ...


:drumroll:



asparagus server.

[Lauri D]

Okay, I must know... what exactly IS an asparagus server? :dunno2:

Yeah, I know, I could google it, but I want liv to explain it :P

[livius drusus]

Well let me just whip it out of its satin-lined maroon velvet box and describe it in excruciating detail.

Okey dokey. First and foremost, they're basically tong shaped. Picture salad tongs, only really, really short, and with interlocking blunt teeth. The idea, I suppose, is to capture those slippery asparagi in a pincer movement and deliver in one elegant motion to the waiting plates of one's dinner guests.

The thing is, I did Google it when I opened the box, because I had no idea what in blithering hell I had to pretend to be excited about (a hot dog grabber?). It didn't help, though, and I was none the wiser until Mom announced it triumphantly over the phone. If you search for asparagus server you'll see platters, spatulas, things along those lines, but it takes a bit of hunting to track my kind down, because you see, mine is special: it's made to serve one asparagus at a time.

Yes, you read that correctly. My mother gave me a sterling silver individual asparagus server.

:hahaha:

[Scotty]

She should have at least got you a set of 8, I mean, what was she thinking?

-Scott

[Ymir's blood]

Yes, you read that correctly. My mother gave me a sterling silver individual asparagus server.

:hahaha:
But can it be used for :broccoli: as well?

[Lauri D]

Trip out. :choices2:

[lisarea]

Yes, you read that correctly. My mother gave me a sterling silver individual asparagus server.

:hahaha:
But can it be used for :broccoli: as well?

Or as an individual spaghetti server!

You like spaghetti, don't you, liv?

[LadyShea]

Um livius, do you entertain formally? When did she think you were going to need a sterling asparagus tong?

I worked at a jewelry store that had a fine gift section. We carried such indispensable items as sterling grape scissors, tiny gherkin forks, mini salt and pepper shakers meant for each place setting, and place card holders. Nobody ever bought such things, we just polished them ;)

[seebs]

One of the most successful presents I ever got someone was a Valentine's Day gift for Beloved Spouse. It was a 4" chocolate heart. I mean, one single big piece of chocolate.

With a Swiss Army Knife stuck in it.

Got chick + "knife in heart" == Joy. Especially because she'd been complaining that she'd lost her old knife.

[Beth]

I usually like all of my gifts, even down to the cheap and crappy ones that I never use. I usually value a card more and feel more gratitude to a lovely card, because, after all, the thought matters more to me than anything. But the worst gift I ever received was a ruby necklace and earring set. It was nice, It was the most expensive gift they had ever given me me, my husband's dad and step mom, but there was an underlying feud attached and it was a buy off.

The wifie insulted me and hurt my children horribly by refusing to acknowledge us in a grocery store while shopping. I did not even know they were there till my husband's little brother said hi to me, laughed and walked away.

I ran after them, with the kids saying, "Guys, grandma's here!" They were happy, so I went nearly up to them and hollered out to them in a greeting (it was not really a holler, but load enough for them to hear) and we got ignored, although my husband's step and the boy were giggling at eachother. Then we passed them again, several times, my kids trying to get her to say hi. When we checked out theuy walked by us laughing, not looking at us, with my daughter shouting, "Grandma!"

Well, I was pissed. I called Jim's mom, telling her what a bitch her ex's wife was, and somehow word got round to the ass my husband calls father. He badmouthed me, said I was a liar and crazy, his super fundy goodie two shoes wife lying through her teeth about absolutely hurting my kids. So I refused to speak to them or call to talk to her like I was supposed to to make it all better.

The gift came for xmas as a buy-off. So I threw it away.

[lisarea]

Man alive, Beth, that story pisses me off. There's just nothing that excuses treating kids like shit to get to their parents.


The gift came for xmas as a buy-off. So I threw it away.

The piker in me wants to say, "NOOOOO! Don't throw it away!!!" but you know, that's actually the best thing you could do. I probably wouldn't have the nerve to do it myself, but I gotta respect that you do.

Do they know you tossed it?

[Beth]

My best gifts ever have been from my kids. They make me ornaments every year that I find valuable enough to store away in my china cabinet. I love xmas, put up two or three trees, so I love their ornaments. My mother has also given me some very unique ornaments. A butterfly that I have on my dresser mirror, a baby cradle that has a wire frame and silk fabric with silk ribbon embroidery and lace.

My mother-in-law gave me a beautiful italian sculpture of a woman and her dog. It is about 18 inches high. My dad always buys me lovely things. Last year he bought me a three strand cultured pearl bracelet because I told him that I was supposed to get one from Jim, but we were too broke to buy expensive gifts for each other last year. I cried when I opened the gift.

My husband bought me Bridges of Madison County for my birthday. I read the story and cried, I thought it so beautiful. Anyway, I love gifts that are given to show a person loves or cares about me. I do not care if it is a garage sale find, a self-creation, or an expensive bauble. What matters to me is the motive and the notion behind the gift.

[Beth]

Do they know you tossed it?I think my kids told them. I let everyone know what I thought of their gift, so I am sure they heard from someone.

I give my love freely, but I will never be bought. I did clearly state that to them.

[wade-w]

I usually value a card more and feel more gratitude to a lovely card, because, after all, the thought matters more to me than anything.

The best (most touching) gift I've ever received was a card.

I was in the US Navy during the Reagan years. In the Autumn of '82 - Winter and Spring of '83 my destroyer was deployed to the Persian Gulf to monitor the Iran-Iraq war. I had the midwatch that xmas night, and when I got relieved the next morning and went to get some sleep, there was a card laying on my rack.

It wasn't especially lovely on the face of it; the picture was a christmas tree, hand drawn in crayon by a second grader. Inside, it said "Season's Greetings, Sailor," also in crayon. To this day that card, drawn by an anonymous child, touched me more than anything else I've ever been given.

[Beth]

Aw, Wade, that was really touching to read. :)

[wade-w]

Aw, Wade, that was really touching to read. :)

Thanks Beth!

[Roland98]

Best--my husband got me a mother's ring he'd designed for Christmas the year my daughter was born. He had to wait until kind of the last minute (well, at least until Dec. 1st) to be sure she was going to be a December baby.

Other best--a friend from college made up a framed collage of photographs for our whole group of friends when we graduated. I am a picture freak (and a sap to boot), so it was a perfect gift.

Worst--for our first Valentine's day, my husband got me one of those gold-dipped roses. Not only was it ugly, but, well, what do you do with a 14-kt gold rose??? I made him take it back, and we no longer do Valentine's day presents. :)


We also have some family friends who still get us gifts (they used to do this for us as kids, and won't stop even though we've asked them not to get us anything any longer). But they're total crap. My sister's one year was a candle which had already been burned (just a little, but the wick was black) and mine was some stinky old lady perfume (and I don't even wear good perfume, much less something that shouts "granny.") It's now kind of a running joke to see how bad the presents from them will be.

[seebs]

My dad once got my mom a thing of candy from the store, with the price tag still on it, for their anniversary. Or maybe it was her birthday. But it wasn't a kind she liked, and it was discounted heavily, and... She told him if that was the best he could do, not to bother, so he didn't bother after that. They ended up divorced... Predictable enough.

A definite example of a Bad Present.

My wife once gave me a bad present that was well-intended and well-considered, except for things she couldn't possibly know; a program called "E-Tools" which was a character generator and related stuff for 3E D&D... That only worked on Windows. Luckily, the store took a return for that reason (normally, they wouldn't take returns on software).

She has a hell of a time shopping for me. She did once get me an absolutely beautiful present, but it cost something like $400, and since I earn most of the money, she mostly felt guilty about it. It's a silver cross from about 400AD. Not a replica; an actual artifact from that far back. It's not especially great workmanship by modern standards, but it's got history. I have a reasonable selection of cross jewelry now, because I'm hard to shop for, and everyone knows I like it. :)

[Dingfod]

wade-w wins, hands down.

[Beth]

She did once get me an absolutely beautiful present, but it cost something like $400, and since I earn most of the money, she mostly felt guilty about it.I'm like that. On our first Xmas married, I did yard work for someone I knew to earn money for a gift. We were dirt poor, I was eighteen, but I was able to buy my husband a nice boombox and it felt good that I gave him something I bought with my own money.

[Talulah]

I remember one Christmas when I was a kid, maybe 9, I had asked for a *real* ring from my Grannie. I told her I didn't want something fake, I wanted real gold. I am the type of person, and I was moreso as a child, that I usually only want one thing, and I will tell you what that is and if you decide to get smart and get me something else, things aren't going to go well. It's a character flaw. Well, I opened up all the presents and I got the requisite underwear that you have to model (hold up for jeers) for the family and the hideous shoes and I suffered all that bravely because I knew I was going to get my coveted ring. However, all the presents were opened and there was nothing left for me. I started crying because I was so disappointed and then my Grannie put this box in my hand. I opened it up and there was my ring, perfect and beautiful. It was my birthstone and I had to wear it on my middle finger until my ring finger grew enough. I never took it off and had to have it repaired a time or two because I played on the swing set with it on and bent it. It was one of the best presents because it was such a surprise and I was sooooo disappointed. Of course, later on I found out they were being cruel by making me think I wasn't going to get it. But they didn't know I was going to cry about it.

The worst, and this is strange, was when I was 16 and I had told my mother I wanted a CD player. I didn't have one and EVERYONE had a CD player by this time. I begged and begged and told her to just get a cheap walkman. Anything. Well, she got me what was, in retrospect, a very beautiful necklace with an opal in the center of a 3 dimensional heart with holes in it. Hard to describe. I was so disappointed I was unable to appreciate it. I told you it was a character flaw.

[livius drusus]

I fretted over presents a lot when I was a girl and the disappointment was genuinely painful. In my case, it was due to a surfeit of greed and a total inability to handle frustration. Thankfully, my post-collegiate poverty pretty much cured me of that.

Now it's rare that I even think of something specific for present occasions. I wasn't even disappointed when my mom sent me the silly asparagus server; more like bemused at its suckery and my mom's really very sweet excitement over chotchkes.

[freemonkey]

My wife once gave me a bad present that was well-intended and well-considered, except for things she couldn't possibly know;

My husband did something similar a couple years ago.

My camera broke and was unrepairable (old-no parts). He thought it would be great to get me a new one. At the time, I was all about "manual", "lenses" and "hmmm.... Nikon looks good"

Knowing exactly 1% about cameras, he went to Kit's, in the mall, and found out how expensive cameras can be. He ended up getting me a decent enough barebones Nikon, but the thing was plastic and I just did not like it.

I took it back, and he teased me about it (but I could tell he was hurt), I felt so bad about it, I never did claim my gift from him that Xmas.

[Ymir's blood]

The worst, and this is strange, was when I was 16 and I had told my mother I wanted a CD player. I didn't have one and EVERYONE had a CD player by this time. I begged and begged and told her to just get a cheap walkman. Anything. Well, she got me what was, in retrospect, a very beautiful necklace with an opal in the center of a 3 dimensional heart with holes in it. Hard to describe. I was so disappointed I was unable to appreciate it. I told you it was a character flaw.

One year in my teens, my parents gave me a multi-band radio for Christmas. They didn't get my whatever it was I had asked for and I pretty much made a total ass of myself. :\ I still have the thing, though it no longer works. It serves to remind me to be more gracious in receiving, a lesson learned far too late.

[Talulah]

Well, I wasn't particularly less than gracious, just disappointed. Perhaps it was greed, as livius implies.

[livius drusus]

Um... I didn't imply that about you in the least. I was referring to myself. I didn't just have my heart set on one thing; I counted presents and judged my haul based on how much more shit I got than my friends did and everything. My only point was that I could understand that sense of frustration, not that our motivations were the same.

[Talulah]

Sorry if I misunderstood.

[Ymir's blood]

Well, I wasn't particularly less than gracious, just disappointed. Perhaps it was greed, as livius implies.
Your post reminded me of my own experience but it was not my intent to imply anything about you. :\

I was a lot less than gracious in that situation.

[Beth]

There were probably sometimes I was a little dissappointed in the gifts I received, but I never really expected. I was taught that one should never expect to be given anything. That a gift is a gift and is solely up to the giver's discretion. But, at sometimes such as birthdays and Christmas, we were told that we were told a certain dollar amount that would be spent onm each of us for gifts. We were allowed to make a list as to what we would like to have in that range and my mom and step dad would select from that list, not telling us what we were getting. This way, we were suprised and got the things we would enjoy as well.

Now days, I do not like to be given gifts that are too costly. I get upset when they are given to me and I have specifically asked people not to spend much money on me because I cannot afford to reciprocate. I can be more pleased with a eight dollar paring knife that is well balanced than I would an expensive doll. I would apprieciate the practical and less expensive gift much more.

Growing up, I was always content with my gifts until I met a rich girl whose both parents were doctors. She told me what she got for Christmas, and when she asked me what I got, I was suddenly ashamed and disatisfied with my gifts. It's only happened once.