Does anyone really care what you write?

[Dingfod]

I could make this a poll, but I'm not because I want an honest discussion of what you value about interaction on the internet. I do not want this thread to be about me, tell me what being here or on any message board on the internet means to you. What do you get out of it?



Me:
Perhaps it's my insufficiently medicated depression or my 2 day sleep deprivation talking, but I sometimes feel as though I am posting for my own amusement and nothing more. And some of the time I get the impression that everyone else is doing the same. I would like to think there are people out there that give a shit if I post or not or even that I even exist, but I do not feel that way some of the time and right now is one of those times. Sorry to intrude. Feel free to put me on Ignore. I would.
:End of discussion of me.

[viscousmemories]

I often feel the same way, Warren. And it's not unique to discussion boards, either. I often feel like I'm alone in the world and nobody truly cares if I live or die, including me. But I also know that I'm paranoid and depressive and that there are times when I don't feel that way about the same people and places that I sometimes feel that way about. So I figure: Has something changed with the people or places I go to that has resulted in their no longer having any importance to me or them, or is there something going on with me that's creating an erroneous impression of things? And so far I always conclude the latter and keep on keeping on.

[Dingfod]

I've felt that way for a long time. Over two decades ago, I moved a thousand miles away from my parents and siblings. I would call at least once every two weeks, usually more often than that. After a couple of years, I became aware that I was the only one calling, they never called me. So, as an experiment, I didn't call. It was 2-1/2 months before my parents called to see if we were even still alive. My siblings? Never hear from them any more. Of my friends that I've had since I was 12 or 13 years old, only one emails me if he hasn't heard from me in a few weeks. A guy I've seen exactly four times in the last 20 years, cares more about what happens to me than my own family? That's just plain fucked up. I'm going to the internet to seek a family? That might be fucked up too.

[beyelzu]

I have to say that I generallly post because of a sense of community. I think people actually like me and enjoy conversing with me. Although people online are just names and pictures, I think online relationships are as real as their irl counterparts. If I didnt think this, I wouldnt be here. Also, I have never felt as much community elsewhere as I have here. I do care about the fuckwits that post here, and I think/hope that they care about the fuckwit that wrote this post.


btw, thanks adora for providing me with the word fuckwit, I hadnt used it in a long long time.

[Nil Desperandum]

Whether it is self-righteous or not, I believe I have many things to teach many people, and when it happens, I become aware and try to do something about it.

Chris

[Gawen]

Pshaw. I haven't yet put anyone on 'ignore' and I ain't startin with you. Anyway, most of you know I don't post a whole lot. I don't post a whole lot anywhere. Here, I only read threads who's title sticks out and interests me at the same time. Does this mean that many OP's don't interest me? Or that the writer of the OP doesn't interest me? Hardly.

Amusement? Nah. I read the boards to learn. Yeah, I have a sense of humour, but as many of you know it can be raw. Not many people appreciate my sense of humour, so I keep quiet most of the time. And I get quite a few chuckles from posters OP's and replies to others, but see no need to repsond.
It doesn't really matter to me if no one cares what I write...especially when very few or none respond. It happens to all of us. And I can't complain anyway because there's a shitload of OP's I don't read let alone respond to even if I read the entire thread.

Entertainment? Nah. If I wanted that I'd be back into roleplaying. That's why you don't see me in the Humour, Sex and Elsewhere type threads and rarely in the Lounge type threads. Hell, I joined up in three different bulliten/forum boards months ago and haven't even looked at two sites yet (probably won't) and left the other. I can't be bothered. People post the most innane trivial shit, and I include myself in that arena sometimes.

Sad though. Four years ago I was a lot more fun than I am now...at least in chat/forum boards. I'm a lot better in person.


((edited to add that while I was writing this, warrenly's was the only post...LOL)))

Someone mentioned a sense of community. Sorry to say, I don't feel this in any medium I now use. I have become quite the...'Loner'. I have some friends, yes. Friends I've met here but never seen or talked too in real life. Relationships like these seem, to me, disconnected. No...ummm...intermitent? I mean, it's not like I can phone you all up or come over or go to the bar or a ballgame with you all. So I think many of us may have genuine feelings for/about/because of someone at times, but does this carry over all of the time? No, as cold as it sounds. No it doesn't. I'm not close enough to anyone on any board. ((Remember, I'm speaking of message boards and not IM's)) Most likely, at this Gathering, when I can put a voice and a face to many of you, I will be more, for lack of a better word....friendly? I don't know....it just seems important to me these days to really know a person and that includes in person.

So, if anyone falls down and breaks their leg I'll care and let them know. One thing that really bothers me about this type of medium is the distance of us all. I mean, when someone is hurting...what the hell can you do? Not a damn thing but type a few feeble but well meant words. Seems lacking to me. No hugs. No spoken words of encouragement. No tones, no inflections, no body language, no blinking eyes to look into. No chicken soup to deliver. No massage for someone that's had a bad day. No flowers to cheer them up. Not even a fucking phone call. And many times I've said things to many people only to see them not believing me. Frankly, I hate this medium.

But it's a double-edged sword...a love-hate relationship because places like this are the only places where I can speak with people of intelligence.

How many of you have made true friends via message boards and how many of them? By true friends, I mean people that email you or phone you or somehow communicate personally with you on a regular basis and write you or call you if they haven't heard from you.So far, not me. I have a few friends, but none that can claim a phone call let alone one on a regular basis.

Well, there you have it. It may be harsh, but it's brutally truthfull.

[wade-w]

I understand completely warrenly. I often get the feeling that if I were to stop posting right now, and never come back, that nobody would notice, or care if they did. :shrug:

As for why I post, well, as I've said elsewhere, this is the only contact I have with other people. Quite literally online discussions are the only chance I ever have of being able to talk to anyone at all. Unless you count the clerk at the store, etc.

[livius drusus]

It seems to me that people on a discussion board are particularly likely to read what you write because for the most part I think they're either here to discuss, to engage people or to read or a combination of the three. Odds are there's at least one person doing any of those three with at least one other person and at any given time here.

Having said that, get your meds checked and get some sleep. That's fucked up, warren.

[Nil Desperandum]

Hi wade! :wave:

[Dingfod]

wade, I think that is completely true on the larger boards like IIDB. But, I think it's pretty easy to slip through the cracks on a smaller one too. How many of you have made true friends via message boards and how many of them? By true friends, I mean people that email you or phone you or somehow communicate personally with you on a regular basis and write you or call you if they haven't heard from you.

[Nil Desperandum]

wade, I think that is completely true on the larger boards like IIDB. But, I think it's pretty easy to slip through the cracks on a smaller one too. How many of you have made true friends via message boards and how many of them? By true friends, I mean people that email you or phone you or somehow communicate personally with you on a regular basis and write you or call you if they haven't heard from you.

None, but that is because I refuse to let them that close to me. Oddly enough, in my spite for superificial relationships, I shy away from making those the least superficial.

Chris

[wade-w]

I never have, warrenly. None that lasted any significant length of time, anyway. I must admit there are some I would like to know in that way, but it hasn't happened.

[viscousmemories]

wade, I think that is completely true on the larger boards like IIDB. But, I think it's pretty easy to slip through the cracks on a smaller one too. How many of you have made true friends via message boards and how many of them? By true friends, I mean people that email you or phone you or somehow communicate personally with you on a regular basis and write you or call you if they haven't heard from you.
If they haven't heard from me? :chin:

Ohh... you mean like if I were to not be logged in 24x7? Yeah I couldn't tell ya.

But anyway true friends that I communicate with on a regular basis and who would e-mail me if I didn't show up for awhile? Maybe 2 or 3 counting all the time I posted at IIDB, HH and here. But all but one of those are sketchy. :D

However I have enough casual friends here to make it worth my while. I think there are a lot of people who would at least at some point think "whatever happened to vm?" like I have often done about others. In fact I was planning to PM Gawen today to ask whatever happened to him, but now I see I don't have to do that.

I don't really count, though, because I'm integrated into the site so I would naturally be missed if I disappeared. Not many seemed to notice or care much when I stopped posting at IIDB or HH, though. Though I don't want to discount the attention I did get from those I got it from.

[LadyShea]

How many of you have made true friends via message boards and how many of them? By true friends, I mean people that email you or phone you or somehow communicate personally with you on a regular basis and write you or call you if they haven't heard from you.

Until about 6 months ago, when they became so dysfunctional we had to cease contact to protect ourselves, I was in touch with a couple we met on the AOL TAROT forum/chat (not only my old AOL days, but my NEW AGE days, LOL) since '92. Back in those days, we hosted a pool party at the house for over 40 people from that same Tarot room, we had frequent get togethers elsewhere, we had a few people we spoke with/visited/had visit us on a regular basis. One girl lived with us for a few months as a stop on her cross country spiritual quest. We hung out there regularly for several years. Basically, I stopped visiting when I decided New Age was also bunk, and so contact with most of the people, who were into chakras and reiki and past life healing, fell to the wayside. Except that one couple, until they fell apart. Yes, feel free to raz me for being a crystal waver, I've earned it :crazy2:

Currently, I have made a very good friend on one of my infertility boards. We email, have spoken on the phone once, and plan to get together once I get to Alabama, she has relatives in the area we are moving to she visits regularly. I have met another girl from there, we email, but she has breast cancer so contact is limited to "how is treatment going" at this point.

From II, HH, FF, there are quite a lot of people I consider good friends. I have met I don't know how many in person, had a few repeat live visits....heck Pesci spent Christmas with us! I don't chit-chat on the phone with them unless its to discuss a specific issue or make plans (I don't just chit chat on the phone with anyone but my mom in Alabama and best friend in Tulsa), nor do I spend a ton of time PMing or emailing. I find communicating with them via posts/discussions, unless there is some specific private issue to discuss, quite a lot of contact (much more than my non-online friends) since I am online 90% of my waking hours.

[Dingfod]

Oh, I've met people IRL that I first met on message boards. I went up to Denver in May to one of AspenMama's Infidel Parties. I've also ridden motorcycles with guys I met on the internet. One invited me to stay at his house in South Austin during our club's Texas Hill Country ride. One that I met there has been making friendship overatures, I even stopped by his place in East Texas on my way back from taking my daughter down in August. So, I'm not completely bereft of relationships, at least casual ones, created via the internet. But... I have yet to have one of these people express any concern at all if I didn't show up for a couple of weeks on a board where I'm a regular and perhaps even prolific poster. It is this phenomenon that makes me ponder the questions I have raised.

[LadyShea]

But... I have yet to have one of these people express any concern at all if I didn't show up for a couple of weeks on a board where I'm a regular and perhaps even prolific poster. It is this phenomenon that makes me ponder the questions I have raised.

Well, one of the drawbacks to this medium, is that there is no immediately noticeable disruption if a single individual goes missing. Discussion continues. After a few days, I might assume somebody has a life...vacation, kids, work committments what have you and simply chose not to announce it, other times I may not notice until there is a glaring discrepency like "That was a perfect opening for one of warrenly's jokes, where the hell is he?". When I get concerned and start hunting people down is if they have mentioned something that might mean a serious issue....talk of suicide, known health problems, an announced road trip, etc.

[viscousmemories]

When I get concerned and start hunting people down is if they have mentioned... an announced road trip, etc.
Damn. You hunt people down if they announce a road trip? Maybe I'd better not mention that I might be road tripping to Michigan for Thanksgiving, lest you come after me. :P

That should be a fun trip, btw. I haven't been home in like 3 years, and have 2 new nieces and a grandniece I haven't met yet.

And Warren, you should ride down here and have a visit like you once upon a time said you would. Maybe we can meet Gawen together and you guys can talk about shooting things. :whup:

[LadyShea]

Damn. You hunt people down if they announce a road trip? Maybe I'd better not mention that I might be road tripping to Michigan for Thanksgiving, lest you come after me. :P


LOL, didn't quite complete that thought did I? If you announced a road trip, and I knew roughly when you were due back, but you werent' back at the appropriate time, I would start hunting ;)

[Roland98]

I miss people when they don't post for awhile. I've PM'd or emailed some who I used to chat with when I haven't seen them around for awhile; usually I haven't heard back, so I assume they just got bored or something. :( But at the same time, I just can't keep track of everyone, even people whose posts I generally follow. Sometimes it's not until they come back that I notice they hadn't been around for awhile, I guess.

I really love the message boards I post on. Every day I learn something, and people's stories and posts touch me on many different levels (no, not that kind of touching, you pervert). I don't know; I guess reading about other people's struggles and victories makes my struggles seem less important and somehow easier to get through; and celebrating their little victories cheers me up even if my day happens to be crummy. Is that weird? Maybe so; I dunno, I've never been exactly normal.



And Tom, if you end up in Ann Arbor you damn well better get in touch with me or I will totally kick your ass.

[bobeh]

Warren...seems to me it is your depression talking. I know what it sounds like I suppose.

But a few thoughts...these forums or boards are not the same as real life - which is a trite thing to say I know. Not better, not worse..just different. So people come and go, with or without notice...and sometimes not everyone, or even no one, notices. I'm on boards where I would be surprised if anyone knows I'm there or not...including here (although you may know me better from HH - boband).

Another issue - real life friends. I don't have many I would consider close. And those I consider the closest I don't hear from for a year or more at a time. Why? They don't write, use the internet, or bother phoning me. But I still know I could pick up where I left off if we got together again. Whose fault is it that contact isn't regular? I don't know. Don't really worry about it. It just is.

Where I am now I've only been for 2 years...many thousand klicks from where I used to live. I don't have close friends here...but I could hang out with friends about as much as I wanted...if I made the first move. If I wanted to, it's there. Why don't they want to? They may not need it...or perhaps they're waiting for someone else to make the first friendship move.

Most people want superficial. Just how it is. Doesn't mean you are not important...they probably treat you the same as all their other friends. But, if you, like me, value a few closer more involved friendships (sounds corny..but I truly don't mean it in a fruity way) than the "norm" then we probably have to make it happen.

Related topic. A book called "Feeling Good" - (cheap book, been reprinted umpteen times) helped me a bit with some cognitive therapy sort of stuff. Good in combination with antidepressents.

And after all of that...I sincerely do appreciate what you have to say. I relate to much of your life story as you have shared here and there...and appreciate your responses to me on some similar stuff we share w/r/t our domestic situations. So hope you stay around for a long while...I look forward to your posts.

[Dingfod]

The responses here have been great. I told you this was a valid topic, livius. It makes me realize I am not alone in what I'm feeling. At least there are some of share that much.

I'm not going anywhere. You guys online here and at HH and less so, II, are all I've got. I get no intellectual reward for interaction with my wife or my coworkers. In fact, I get along best with my daughter Roxy, who just turned 17. Other than that one old friend in Tennessee that I exchange emails with, that's it, I have no friends IRL. I want friends.

Tom, what are you doing next week? Methinks I need a road trip, and Dallas is not that far away. 2 years ago, I went down to downtown Dallas to see a motorcycle show, stopping in Plano to ride the train on in because I was afraid parking was going to be a nightmare. I went down there with my older daughter, Laney. We went down and back home the same day, stopping at a taqueria in Plano for dinner before heading north. As for talking about shooting stuff, it'll have to be historically, because I haven't hardly fired either one of my guns in 10 years.

[godfry n. glad]

Well, dammit, Warn....

I'm an old fart, so I'm kinda slow on the uptake, but yeah....I look for your posts. Even when I know you're pissed off with me. If you're not around for a while, I figure you're on a ride. Is there a specific time period after which we should be concerned?

I have appreciated your off-kilter sense of humor since your insistence that I share a bottle of aftershave with you. You bitch and moan A LOT, but we still listen...don't we? Sometimes we even respond....just like here. But still man, I'd love to have your wit. Even half of it.

...oh, wait, that's the whole thing.

Hey, between you and AspenMama, I was pulled from the morass of my own construction during my exile from IIDB. You regretted it at various times during my stay at HH and you've never quite known what to think of godfry, the loose cannon. Right?

Do you notice it when I'm gone?

If you were gone long enough, I'd ask around. Honest.

godfry

[pescifish]

I never have, warrenly. None that lasted any significant length of time, anyway. I must admit there are some I would like to know in that way, but it hasn't happened.If I lived closer to you, I think we'd be good friends, wade. At least, if we weren't it would be your choice, not because I wasn't interested.

I've definitely made some good friends online. Some have come and gone, but that's the nature of relationships in general. I've met several people from IIDB/HH who I now consider my friends. These are people I would go out of my way to spend time with them whenever it's possible. I had a boyfriend I met online--a relationship that lasted nearly 3 years. My current best friend is someone I met online and we email daily and get together whenever the planets align correctly. These relationships are as solid as my IRL ones. I've even mixed 'em all up: LadyShea and her husband met my close friend of 25 years and we all had a blast.

I think I do online socializing because I really am a hermit. A very outgoing and friendly misanthropic hermit. :sadcheer: I have a horrible ambivalence in the fact that I prefer being alone and almost never get lonely but I so much enjoy all the people I love. I wish I could spend time with them more to give each relationship what it is worth. If only I didn't actually have to give up my alone time!

The computer interaction is a bit easier to fit in than scheduling a lunch/dinner date. I think I mostly get online to read other people's posts, but there are very definite times when I wish I could figure out how to get more attention. Besides transforming myself into a 24 year old irish-asian graduate student/model who flashes her tits while expertly debating the virtues of casual sex, that is.

Hmmm, maybe a Pop-Up O' Love would work... :thinkup:

[viscousmemories]

And Tom, if you end up in Ann Arbor you damn well better get in touch with me or I will totally kick your ass.
Man I was so about to get an ass kicking. It didn't even occur to me that we could meet. Now I'm looking forward to the trip even more. :)

Tom, what are you doing next week? Methinks I need a road trip, and Dallas is not that far away.
Well nobody has gotten around to analyzing my star chart yet, but I suspect I'll be unemployed and sitting around the house. As Bob Barker says, come on down! :yup:

[HelenM]

wade, I think that is completely true on the larger boards like IIDB. But, I think it's pretty easy to slip through the cracks on a smaller one too. How many of you have made true friends via message boards and how many of them? By true friends, I mean people that email you or phone you or somehow communicate personally with you on a regular basis and write you or call you if they haven't heard from you.

I've made a few; like RL, of the people I meet, there are a few with whom I'd very much like more contact and evidently the feeling is mutual, so we get into more regular e-mail contact. If they lived nearer me we probably would meet. The downside of meeting people online is that they may well live 1,000s of miles away, which makes meeting up difficult to impossible unless one of us has the money, time and availability to do some significant travelling.

I enjoy reading your posts, warrenly, and I would notice if you stopped posting. I hope your anti-depressants kick in and/or something else in your life changes so you feel better.

Helen

[Farren]

Personally I interact with people online the way I interact with friends in the flesh. If they disappear for a while or don't call it doesn't bother me in the slightest.

I've got one friend who's living in London at the mo' who I've known since I was around 17. As teenagers we spent a hell of a lot of time together but in my early twenties I saw him less and less. Eventually about 4 years went by without any contact but when he phoned and said "Hey, do you want to get together and play some guitar" it was like we'd been in contact all along. He just strolled in, grabbed a drink and talked shit like we'd seen each other yesterday. A coupla years later he buggered off to London and we speak only occassionally since.

Same thing happened with the guy I was in business with for two or three years (up until the end of last year). We lived in a commune together and for about a year and a half and were bosom buddies. Then there was a complete lack of contact until we hooked up in 2000 and went into business together.

It seems my whole life people have drifted in and out of my life in cycles, or I've drifted in and out of theirs. Its even like that with my brother, who I love dearly. Perhaps its because I never got married and raised a family. I haven't even had a lover for the last 4-5 years. There's no sense of commitment.

It doesn't mean I don't care about them. When its in my face and its somebody I care about I'm there for them. I once fed, clothed, housed and gave an allowance (1/4 of my salary) to a friend for six months until he could get a decent job on Joburg. But I don't feel any obligation to check up or check in. I've met too many wonderful people in my life and I dearly love all of them, including all of my Exes. If I worried about every one of them I'd be paralysed with worry.

Its the same on BB's. There are people here that I would dearly, dearly love to meet in the flesh. I won't name them because any list like that is dangerous but I will say it includes you, Warren. The issue of whether I have made or can make "real", lasting friendships via the 'net is really a non-issue in terms of my personal life experience. I've always felt love, respect and mutual enjoyment are enough without the attendant implied promise of permanence.

[JoeP]

I care too much about what people write. If I read everything written, just on this board alone, with the attention I'd like, and responded with the detail I'd like, I would have no time for anything else. Sometimes I have to filter out posts just cos they are too long. Sometimes I can't respond even when I want to.

I notice when people seem quiet. I got Farren's number after his emergency week in hospital cut off from the net, when I realised I had no way of finding out what was up. A few people have seemed quiet here at odd points in the recent past, like seebs, but if they have recently visited I hold on longer before thinking of asking.

I notice changes in people's activity too. Your posts have been different in the past couple of days ... and you changed your avatar to the baby ... and I even commented on this. But sometimes it's damn hard to know what to say.

[Corona688]

Getting back to the OP, yeah, I'm interested in what people write here. It's a small enough board I don't have to ration myself. I mostly restrict myself to the 'upper' forums though(I love how the 'higher' you go, the more frivolous the forums get :D) since I'm not too qualified to comment on political things.

Though I admit a certain amount of stubbornness when contributing to a thread... I don't like the feeling that I've been ignored, real or not. Fortunately doesn't happen here much.

[lisarea]

Dang it, Warren, I love you! What more could you possibly want from life?

I am personally very very bad at social stuff, for the most part, so I often prefer text to talking to people with my face. I don't even do chats, really, because I am such a dork. I like the editing layer. One outgrowth of this is that I frequently don't post strictly social kinds of things, and I rarely even do that in PM. I should. I try. But I don't. I get this idea that I'm getting on peoples' nerves, or boring them, and I have little feel for social pacing, I guess you'd call it. I'm afraid I'm going to come across strange, and as a result, I probably come across as cold or something. I'm secretly NOT, though. Or at least not as bad as I seem.

So, what I'm trying to say is that I like you guys way more than you probably know. But I will rarely pick up on any social cues indicating that you'd appreciate my mentioning that. But if you ever want me to, send me a PM telling me to be nice to you, and I will.

[viscousmemories]

I like the editing layer.
That's a really key point for me as well. I spend a lot of time writing, proofing and editing every post - even just friendly chatty posts - to convey a precise idea. I'm the same way in person (although usually only when I'm trying to discuss something serious), but the thing is I'm brain damaged so it tends to come out verrrrrry slowly. As a result I get interrupted and/or people try to finish my sentences for me a lot, and I hate that. I am the youngest of 10 kids so I know all too well what it feels like to have no voice.

I don't know how many people care what I write. I'm sure a lot of people totally skip my posts because they tend to be long, pedantic, stilted, argumentative, or otherwise dry. But oh well. You'll never find the diamonds if you don't go into the mine. And I think everyone spits up a diamond once in awhile, so I try to read everything. I'm with JoeP, though, that it's a physical impossibility to respond as thoroughly as I want to every post I want to respond to. Especially because I'm so anal about it.

[Dingfod]

I feel really stupid now. Most of the time I'm not lonely at all. I was suffering what I've termed "Midnight Blues". They happen every time I work extended stretches of night shifts. I have just finished working 9 night shifts in the last 12 days, with 2 day shifts in the middle. I'm wrung out and sleep deprived. Sorry to have burdened anyone at all.

[Clutch Munny]

Every post I read changes me in at least some small way. Most of the people on this board by now have a genuine claim on some aspect of how I think, at least about specific issues. wade and vm, to choose just two self-doubting examples, are very far from the least such influences in that portion of my cognitive economy that's traded online.

In a few years of activity on discussion boards, moreover, I have read a non-trivial number of posts or threads -- I'd guess 10 or so -- that have made a identifiable large-scale differences to my actions and beliefs.

On the other hand I rarely make a point of explaining to others that they have done so. (In part, perhaps, because it's not always immediately obvious to me that they have.) And I assume that more than a few other people are like me in all these respects.

So I assume that what I write too has effects on others, ranging from indefinitely small to, very occasionally or at some point yet to occur, fairly profound.

[pescifish]

I feel really stupid now. Most of the time I'm not lonely at all. I was suffering what I've termed "Midnight Blues". They happen every time I work extended stretches of night shifts. I have just finished working 9 night shifts in the last 12 days, with 2 day shifts in the middle. I'm wrung out and sleep deprived. Sorry to have burdened anyone at all. Don't feel badly, warren. You aren't alone in regrets about posting, either. I was in a goofy mood yesterday and posted all sorts of shit I normally wouldn't have these days. Coming back today, I have to say I regret most, if not all, of it.
:doh-sign:

[Adora]

tell me what being here or on any message board on the internet means to you. What do you get out of it?

Well shit. That's a rather diverse bunch of meanings. I've already kinda said in a few threads the difference. Some forums I'm on simply for specific interests, like my time spent at II. They're just interest-feeders, so I can get as much entertainment and fun out of said interests. Others, like this place, are more general social/entertainment/communication forums. Some forums I'm on combine the two, because the people I know in the interest forum I am also close to in other ways out of the forum.

As for you guys? Well, don't take this the wrong way, but there's a lot of factors that would prevent me personalising my relationships with anyone here more. I don't live in the US, like (all?) most of you, I think I'm much younger than (some?) most of you, and somehow, I don't think anything would work offline. Nothing personal, just how it goes. If I had the money to jet around the world, that might be a different story. Currently, I can barely afford busfares to university.

The few times I have met people from online offline, it was only because there was some mutual exchange going on- eg they had a programme I wanted to borrow, they built my computer, I got tickets for something and bought one for a dude online who couldn't get one in time etc etc.

The only person I knew offline before online was a very close friend I met at university and shared a strong mutual online interest with.

[Shake]

Dammit. I just lost the whole reply I was working on for the last 10 minutes or so. Not that it was that long, I just spent some time really thinking about it.

Anyway, I have had one fellow poster (at IIDB) who PM'd me to tell me that he enjoyed some posts I'd recently made. Also, I've had invitations to be a mod over there before, so I guess somebody must at least be paying me some attention.

Hmm ... what else did I say? Oh yeah ... every once in a while, I'll make a post that I feel is actually quite good, and of course, no one even comments on it. Good or bad. Maybe the horse has been beat by that point or maybe no one else is paying attention to the topic anymore. I guess it depends on how you interpret the response (or lack thereof) to such posts.
Some forums I'm on simply for specific interests, like my time spent at II. They're just interest-feeders, so I can get as much entertainment and fun out of said interests. Others, like this place, are more general social/entertainment/communication forums. Some forums I'm on combine the two, because the people I know in the interest forum I am also close to in other ways out of the forum.
Exactly. Some times I will publicly acknowledge an outstanding post by another member, and other times I just read it and let it soak in. Sometimes I don't want to detract from that post by adding a response.

[trendkill]

I once fed, clothed, housed and gave an allowance (1/4 of my salary) to a friend for six months until he could get a decent job on Joburg.
That's awesome. I've helped out friends who were down on their luck before, sometimes for long periods, but nothing on that level.