There has been so much said and written on this topic that I can't even, but this article in particular was a really good read.
Why So Many Men Hate the Last Jedi But Can’t Agree on Why | Bitter Gertrude
tl;dr: Criticism of TLJ (and Fury Road, and Lady Ghostbusters, etc.) is very obviously based on gender. However, to protect everyone's delicate feefees, we will allow that maybe everyone isn't blatantly, overtly misogynist. It's just that the prescribed gender roles in media are so ingrained into our expectations that it just feels like bad filmmaking when they get subverted.