Being Republican in Illinois is a tough gig, tough enough that taking it too seriously can make you really crazy and stupid.
For instance,
this here Republican plans a primary challenge to the incumbent Republican congressman from Illinois' 13th Congressional District. So then, two strong Republican candidates in a district with virtually no chance of any Democrat winning! Sounds like great news for the GOP. After all, a primary contest will get Republicans in that district interested, which may well inure to the party's benefit in statewide matters.
Yeah, well, unhand your Johnson, Kemo Sabe, and face the horror head-on. The challenger is a pretty lady -- a pretty BIRACIAL lady at that. She's even won some very high profile beauty pageants. Nothing about the challenger sits well with Montgomery County Republican Party Chairman Jim Allen, who's
confident that the incumbent congressman will send the filthy little "streetwalker" back to "Shitcago" where she'll get quota-hired by some law firm.
Protip to other Republicans who find themselves in the same or similar circumstances: always assume your emails will become public. Slavish devotion to that assumption might help make you appear less shitheaded than you actually are.
Oh, did I say Montgomery County Republican Party Chairman Jim Allen? Mah bad! Make that
ex-Montgomery County Republican Party Chairman Jim Allen.