[The Man]

This could go in a lot of places, but I'm putting it here, because Florida.

This is Florida's Surgeon General being removed from a #COVID19 briefing by @GovRonDeSantis staff right after saying we'll need to social distance until there is a vaccine. https://t.co/3pBOV7dMP5 pic.twitter.com/czp7dTqfdT

— Kevin Cate (@KevinCate) April 13, 2020

I apologise to the rest of the country/world on behalf of my state. If it helps, we didn't actually elect Governor* Florida Man. The office was stolen. I believe Gillum is in rehab right now, but he'd still be doing a better job than DeSantis (or at least his Lt. Gov. would).

On the other hand, there hasn't been a Weird Florida Story in this thrad in a while, so here's your fix:

Deputies @FlaglerSheriff: woman arrested for placing dozens of Easter eggs in mailboxes around county w pornographic materials in them. 42 yo Abril Cestoni facing a host of charges including violating stay st home order. Investigators say she was ranting about church & clergy. pic.twitter.com/N8KPzEv0eE

— claire metz (@clairemetzwesh) April 9, 2020

Take it away, Flagler County Sheriff's Office:

Woman Arrested for Putting Easter Eggs with Explicit Content in Mailboxes

Since Sunday, April 5, 2020, the Flagler County Sheriff’s Office (FCSO) has received numerous calls from local residents throughout Flagler County stating that they found a plastic Easter egg in their mailbox that contained pornographic images, non-threatening references to local churches and county buildings, and other miscellaneous items.

On Wednesday evening, FCSO received multiple calls from residents reporting that a female was once again placing plastic eggs in mailboxes, this time on Hernandez Avenue. Corporal Jacob had previously identified the suspect vehicle as a 2004 silver Honda Civic. FCSO’s Problem Area Crime Enforcement (PACE) Unit began to search areas where the reports were coming from. At 11:19 p.m., PACE located the vehicle traveling north on Belle Terre Parkway at Whiteview Parkway and a traffic stop was conducted.

During the investigation, 42-year-old Abril Cestoni (DOB 4/10/1977) admitted to placing the items in the mailboxes stating that she was educating people. There was a bag full of pornographic material inside the vehicle and she told deputies that she had distributed over 400 pamphlets in the past few days throughout Flagler County. Cestoni did not have any symptoms of COVID-19.

“Our team did a great job in tracking this deranged offender down and taking her into custody,” Sheriff Rick Staly said. “Thankfully she did not appear to be sick with COVID-19 symptoms, but she certainly needs some help. This again proves that ‘see something, say something’ works and we thank the community for being part of our guardianship policing philosophy.”

Cestoni was arrested and charged with 11 counts of Distributing Obscene Material. It was also determined that Cestoni did not have a valid driver’s license. She was additionally charged with Driving with a Suspended License and Violating Executive Order 20-91 for conducting travel not related to essential activity. She was booked into the Sheriff Perry Hall Inmate Detention Facility and is being held on a $7,000.00 bond.

Cestoni has previously been arrested in Flagler County for Driving with a Suspended License, Writ of Bodily Attachment, and Failure to Appear for a Traffic Summons.

Additional charges may be pending as the investigation continues.

(via Balloon Juice)

On a serious note, she sounds mentally ill and I do hope she gets help. This state, believe it or not, has actually passed some decent legislation in that regard in the last four or five years, so the odds of that happening are not quite as far-fetched as one might think.