Mrs. S and I have been watching episodes of "Professor of Rock" on YouTube from time to time. Last night, we watched his take on the worst rock song of all time: "Disco Duck", by Rick Dees:
The Professor expressed surprise that the song has been ignored by so many other compilers of "worst" lists (although it did make no. 33 on this list of the 40 "most irritating": Ranking The Most Irritating Pop Songs in Music History | TheFunPost because of the duck voice and sounds).
I think maybe it got a pass on a lot of lists because it was a novelty song, and didn't pretend to be anything else.
3, 2, and 1 on the "most irritating" list were, in order "Barbie Girl," "I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)", and the Baby Shark song. I'm having trouble singling out any one song as "worst," at the moment, but I'm pretty sure "My Ding-A-Ling" would be up (down?) there on the list. I'll spare everyone the link.
Charlene regrets her abortion(s), and regrets all the fun times of her youth. Now she plans to bed down with the man who fought with her this morning.
Or so she sang. She didn't write the song about crying for unborn children. The song that makes others also feel bad about abortion. Writer/s: Kenneth W Hirsch, Ronald N. Miller - Publisher: Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Universal Music Publishing Group
Quote:
Hey, you know what paradise is? It's a lie
A fantasy we create about people and places as we'd like them to be
But you know what truth is?
It's that little baby you're holding, and it's that man you fought with this morning
The same one you're going to make love with tonight. That's truth, that's love
Sometimes I've been to cryin' for unborn children
That might have made me complete
But I, I took the sweet life and never knew I'd be bitter from the sweet
I spent my life exploring the subtle whoring that cost too much to be free
Hey lady, I've been to paradise, but I've never been to me
Don't forget to feel regret! (I've been to cryin' for unborn children)
Despite the Right To Lifers using this song to slutshame and guilt trip people about abortion, it may just mean that "she" regretted not breeding a lot for the man who fights with her, or, something?
2008 random partial opinion
Quote:
... and instead choosing the party life, and realizing too late that living "the sweet life" made her "bitter" (a play on the word bittersweet). loose sex instead of monogomy has made her bitter and unhappy.
the moral of the story is that a woman who chooses to settle down and raise a family will be happier in the end than a woman who chooses the glamorous "carefree" wild lifestyle.
WORST SONG, REGARDLESS.
2010 review quote, and I'll stop.
Quote:
here's a review of it i wrote for a magazine called Dummy. the key point of the review is that it was written by two men. i love the song because it's so wrong, especially as it's men writing that women should stay at home. this wouldn't get released these days, for better or worse.
Charlene Never Been To Me In the mid ‘70s women were only just getting the freedoms they deserved. So the tales that Charlene is relaying on this country-pop epic seem particularly exciting. Swanning around the globe, she romps with preachers, gets undressed by kings and sees some things that “a woman ain’t supposed to see” (what, like a bloke lighting his farts?). It all sounds like the perfect life after the oppression of your apron-ed mother. But oh no, Charlie is moaning — she’d swap it all for the “unborn children that might have made me complete.” Not only that, she wants to tell disconcerted mothers and regimented wives that they should stay home and let their husbands have their joyless fumbles. Rather odd take on this new freedom, wouldn’t you think? Well not when you take into account a couple of facts. Firstly, Charlene went on to record an album of Christian songs after this was a belated hit. And ‘Never Been To Me’ was written by — of course — a couple of men. So it’s puritanical, patronising and sexiest — which is exactly why it’s sounds so good in these days of inoffensive pop. Morality tales are a relic of another musical age, as is the delicious voyeurism derived from songs based around stories. A couple of years later AIDS would hit and Charlene would no doubt feel vindicated. But as the strings soar around her breathy vocals, pop music has never sounded sexier. Now, where can we find a king to undress us — the champagne’s getting warm and the yacht is about to set sail.
My go too Crazy Frog Popcorn.
Not just because of the annoying sounds but you need a quick history of Popcorn.
Here's the original from 1969, (this is basically cutting edge beginning of electronic music, synthesizer work. If you think you hate Popcorn, give this a quick listen).
Popcorn gave us one of the corner stones of late 70s and early 80s electronic music with Oxygène (Part IV) in 1977. Sped up to 2x or beyond you can really hear the popcorn inspiration.
Ari, those were all terrible. But, either the original "Popcorn" or the 1972 version is forever linked to a key memory for me. Storytime!
I was a little kid. My overbearing mother had forced my autistic (no one knew) father to quit truck driving for a "real career" as a manager of the local Cumberland Farms convenience store. He hated it, but, he had to obey her.
My loner father, who knew nothing about retail, management, convenience stores, or how to do that job, had a very hard time at it. I remember my dad being very upset and confused one day, when the owners of his Cumberland Farms convenience store told him he was being fired, for "theft." My father stole notihing but the neiighbor's tomatoes, and he was inconsolable. It was the first time I had ever seen him be sad.
Daddy took me with him to go meet his older brother, my uncle, at uncle's very fancy elite country club, in Pennsylvania, to beg for money to help us get by after he lost his job. The song "Popcorn" was playing, as I sat at the beautiful table, with a real tablecloth, in the big gold room. I don't know which version.
The song was on, my dad had asked for help, and my uncle declined immediately. My father suddenly sent me to the bar. Since it was still afternoon, the bar and country club were empty, and quiet, except for "Popcorn," my desperate father, and his haughty brother, who was 12 years older, and had always been distant.
The bartender gave me a fancy bar drink, called a "Shirley Temple." A new song played, but I was still thinking about the other one, "doot doot doot doot, doot doot doo," as the bartender slid a small bowl of bright red maraschino cherries to me, to snack on, alone.
We went home emptyhanded, but I had that song locked in my mind, all the way back to our little pink house in the 'hood. Daddy got a trucker job at the local CBS Records, and he was happier.
Many years later, I learned that there were several versions of the song, "Popcorn;" the red maraschino cherries were just dyed grapes; and, in 1990, Cumberland Farms got caught in a scandal regarding false accusations and firing of hundreds of employees. There were lawsuits, and a tell-all on the TV show "60 Minutes." My father wasn't part of that.
Daddy liked trucker music, so, I learned to like a few Country-crossover hits by Eddie Rabbit, such as "Drivin My Life Away," and "I Love a Rainy Night."
The song was originally written from a male perspective but was rewritten by Ron Miller for Charlene. The use of the line "I've been to crying for unborn children" was not written about abortion. The line refers to a woman who is at a point in her life that she wished she had taken the time to have children.
Nor did she (the singer) plan to sleep with the man she fought with that morning. She says that's what love is (i.e., making up after fight, instead of taking off).
And it CAN'T be the worst--it opens "Priscilla--Queen of the Desert"!
But, the Right to Lifers still went totally bonkers over what they thought that song meant, back then.
I wish I had been able to see "Priscilla, Queen of the Desert," but, alas. I've never seen it. Thanks for the link to that video, ShottleBop.
I imagine that I, too, write songs and lyrics. I once wrote a song about a topic, and used language that might appear, to some, to be "anti-abortion" or whatever, if they took it that way. Maybe Charlene inspired me, or something. eh. We'll never know.
Honestly, I could make a separate thread, title it WORST POSSIBLE SONGS EVER, post my own dumb alleged lyrics, idk. Have you ever heard of the concept of "winning therapy"?
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"Have no respect whatsoever for authority; forget who said it and instead look what he starts with, where he ends up, and ask yourself, "Is it reasonable?""
While I'm a fan of (a lot of songs by) the Chili Peppers, this one stands out as one of the worst alleged "songs" ever recorded. It sounds like it was entirely created, recorded, and chosen to include on an album while on enough smack to kill a moose. Its only virtue is that it's short.
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"Her eyes in certain light were violet, and all her teeth were even. That's a rare, fair feature: even teeth. She smiled to excess, but she chewed with real distinction." - Eleanor of Aquitaine
I once wrote a song about a topic, and used language that might appear, to some, to be "anti-abortion" or whatever, if they took it that way.
One of the shit things about the anti-abortion movement is the way it makes it harder for us to be able to create and communicate about messy and complicated feelings we might have around abortion, miscarriage, infertility and childlessness.
There's a story in my head that I'll likely never write, mostly because I'm shit at writing stories, but untangling all the core of it from the shitty politics would make it even harder if I decided to try.
MacArthur Park is way the hell up (down) there. The Richard Harris version, of course. I actually find the Donna Summer version somewhat listenable.
Jesus, Take the Wheel would get serious consideration as well but for the fact that it inspired Nick Offerman's hilarious parody, Jesus, Take the Weed.
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"We can have democracy in this country, or we can have great wealth concentrated in the hands of a few, but we can't have both." ~ Louis D. Brandeis
"Psychos do not explode when sunlight hits them, I don't give a fuck how crazy they are." ~ S. Gecko
It's a fun exercise in competitive aesthetics aka cultural bullying, I suppose, but meh!
Have we agreed on whether we mean worst example of songwriting, or worst arrangement of a song, or worst recorded performance? Surely no one else can ever have under-performed the immortal Florence Foster Jenkins here:
to the above questions,
IMHO, it should be overall package, I think. There are great pieces of music that have been all but eviscerated in production, Previous offering for example, or some of the amazing work of Spike Jones come to mind. and some really badly written music, that is quite remarkable and enjoyable in the right hands.
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“Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.”
― Mark Twain
Worst song?
Re: Worst song?
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Linear Mode
