I just overheard an OVER FORTY MINUTE explanation of how a lady picks up her daughter from school.
I looked at my watch a few minutes in, when I noticed this was getting kind of weird, and it was still happening when I left just over 40 minutes later. It included a detailed, turn-by-turn account of how to get to the school, and then, an extended dance mix explaining how there is a circular driveway in front of the school, so you pull in behind the car at the end of the line, and then, the car that reaches the designated pickup point picks up their child, and the child gets into his or her parent's car, and then they leave, and then the next car advances to the pick up spot, and each successive car then advances one more spot; and as new cars arrive, they pull up behind the car that is last in line, thus succeeding that previously last car as the new last car in the line.
Also, the fifth and the sixth graders have staggered pick up times, and while the fifth and the sixth graders are in different classes, and have different teachers (here the teachers are named and described), students in different grades will often interact in the halls and during lunch, although the lunch hours are also staggered. This is also the case with the pickup times, you see, because for example, sometimes a parent who arrives late to pick up a fifth grader might actually be BEHIND someone who arrived earlier to pick up a sixth grader. But overall, the system works pretty well, as, you see, there is a circular driveway, and each car advances through the line in the order in which they arrive, pulling up another car length each time a parent picks up their child and the car subsequently leaves the line.
But for the "lady" part, I would have wondered what my stepdad was doing in Juggalonia.
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"Her eyes in certain light were violet, and all her teeth were even. That's a rare, fair feature: even teeth. She smiled to excess, but she chewed with real distinction." - Eleanor of Aquitaine
5 days a week (6 if you're putting in overtime) you have gone to work, punched in and hidden in a broom closet for 8 hours. After being discovered you’ve been put on administrative leave during the investigation. You now get to do nothing without the commute.
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Peering from the top of Mount Stupid
The content of an email I sent today to a local business, that posted for a pastry position...
Quote:
Hello- I saw your posting for a pastry position on Poached, and would like more information to determine if I want to apply.
What hours would this position be?
What are the days off for this position?
How much is the compensation for this position?
Does this position have benefits, i.e. health insurance, etc.
I stopped by on Friday afternoon and then again just now in person this Sunday morning, but missed connecting both times.
Additionally, your posting online has at least three grammatical errors that I would encourage you to correct.
As someone who used to screen resumes, post online for jobs, and knows the challenges of attracting employees- this kind of lazy posting makes me want to scream.
Candidates (with a modicum of intelligence*) for your position will self-screen, if you give them basic information about the job; why would you omit every basic bit of info about the job, unless you are incompetent? Who is going to apply for this position with zero information?**
The posting was seven sentences, and they managed to make three basic grammatical errors.
Both times I talked to front-of-house people who could not answer any of these questions; the first person when I said, "Here's what wasn't listed in the ad," they replied, under their breath, "Sounds about right."
* I have literally interviewed at least ten people who read an ad with clear information about the hours and days, and then said during the interview, "Oh I can't work those hours or those days." It happened often enough that I started every interview reviewing the information contained in the ad to confirm their comprehension level and not waste my time.
** Neophytes and those desperate for employment.
* JoeP wonders what the market is like in the US for professional bakers with good grammar
Quote:
Originally Posted by chunksmediocrites
It happened often enough that I started every interview reviewing the information contained in the ad to confirm their comprehension level and not waste my time.
Something just reminded me of this, and I am right now trying to kill about half an hour, so rather than waiting around for it to be relevant to something else, I'm just going to tell the story apropos of nothing.
Once upon a time, I was working for this very small startup, and I was sharing an office with this younger guy, Dave, who was just getting started out in his first post-college job. I had a lot more experience, so our boss had asked me to sort of mentor him, help him out with basic advice and training in his job and in general kind of stuff about working in an office and so forth. Which I did. We got along really well, usually had lunch together, and sometimes hung out on weekends.
One evening, I think on a Sunday, he rides his bike over to my house and asks me if I will cut his hair in exchange for a bag of used lighters. I guess he'd pick up lighters off the ground when he saw them and keep the ones that still worked, and he had a grocery bag with probably about 30 of them in there. I didn't want to cut his hair, and I didn't want those lighters, but he was all desperate. I had sometimes cut my brothers' hair and also TLM's, but they all had straight hair, whereas Dave's was coarse and really wavy. I told him I'd buy the bag of lighters for the price of a haircut, but he said he really needed a haircut right then, and noplace was open, and blah blah he basically dared me or something, so I did the best I could. It looked OK, I guess.
Then, the next morning, he came in to work, and OMG his hair looked terrible. The curly parts had all rearranged and everything was completely uneven and there were giant doingers popping up all over his head and I was mortified. So I hustled him into the office, closed the door, and he took his shirt off and I started cutting off the most egregious parts just enough that we could slip out and get him a real, professional haircut from whatever the cheapest place was, so of course our boss comes in right as I'm standing there with office scissors cutting my topless coworker's hair at like 8AM.
And those lighters just sort of got spread out, so for many, many years, they'd pop up unexpectedly in weird places. I have moved two or three times since I lived in that house, and I used to find them here.
Re: Miscellany
Nonono. 
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