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Old 07-09-2017, 06:22 AM
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ZEZOZE ZEZOZE is offline
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Default and in fourth place: everyone else!

Zeke (my son, aka Zekester) was in a karate tournament today. he didn't have to take part in it, but decided he'd like to participate. this was his second tournament.

Zeke is not the best at sports and isn't very interested in them. he takes guitar (and is very good) and is quite the artist, but sports isn't really his bag. i have a hard time relating to this because when i was his age i played a lot of sports. i don't really have a jock personality, but i loved playing sports and was in many different leagues. some sports i was pretty good at, while others not so much, but that didn't matter too much to me. i was naturally, but not overly competitive.

i don't push Zeke to play sports, but i do offer up the possibility because i think sports are good for you. sports teaches you teamwork and discipline. it also keeps you fit. so, when Zeke showed an interest in karate, i signed him right up.

he is not the best, but he is progressing. he will be going for his orange belt soon. his performance at today's tournament was not stellar. at the end they gathered all the competitors to give out trophies. they announced one kid as being in fourth place and gave him a medal. then they said Zeke was also fourth place. then two more kids strangely tied for fourth place. all were given the same medal. finally the first, second and third competitors were given their trophies.

Zeke got the same medal at the last tournament, but i missed the speech given when they were handed out- the whole fourth place deal. i just figured it was a participation medal and was presented as such. hearing all these kids being lied to and given medals in such a way grossed me out. i've heard of trophies-for-all, but this was my first dealing with it. it seemed so wrong to me. Zeke looked very upset and he cried a bit as we got ready to go home.

I let him stay up late with me tonight in the family room and i got around to asking him what he did with his medal. he told me he had placed it in his room with the same 'crappy' medal he got last year. Zeke is a smart kid and very intuitive, so i knew what was bothering him and it was the same thing that was bothering me.

i told him that i thought the medal made him feel worse and he agreed. so, i looked him square in the eyes and i asked if he knew why that was. he said he didn't and i said, "Because it's bullshit." that kinda shocked him, but i could see him loosen up and feel a bit better. i said that those medals take away your right to lose. i told him how i had been on plenty of losing teams and we didn't get anything and nobody felt bad about it. we felt bad for losing, but nobody thought we deserved a medal for it. you learned a lesson from it and you moved on, hopefully better and wiser for it.

i reminded him that he might not have been the best competitor out there, but he should be proud that he signed up to go against them and had the guts to try. that is its own trophy. i told him i was proud to see him up there doing his best and that i will always be proud of him so long as he does his best.

stupid world, trying to fuck up my son. :glare:
paranoid fringe dweller
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Thanks, from:
ceptimus (07-09-2017), Crumb (07-09-2017), godfry n. glad (07-10-2017), JoeP (07-09-2017), Kamilah Hauptmann (07-09-2017), mickthinks (07-09-2017), Pan Narrans (07-09-2017), slimshady2357 (07-09-2017), Stormlight (07-10-2017)

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