Ah, I'm at three votes. Let's make it four. Trust me, one more vote for me and the game is over (unless the mob accidentally kills the traitor). I have a sneaky suspicion that a couple of scum already voted for me, possibly all of them, as I have been onto them for a couple of days.
Prometheus was bound to a rock where an eagle devoured his liver each day anew for his offense to the gods. NC Kev now had a whole new appreciation for the poor guy.
He had screamed himself hoarse, hurled insults, pleaded, all to no avail. The town moved like it was up to its hips in molasses and Kev knew that every hour that passed without resolution only played into the mafia's hands. He was sick to death of being a puppet. Hell, he had already lit one on fire, for the love of Pete. What else was it going to take?
But prophecying on the errors of other people's ways rarely endears the prophet to the populace, especially when the acrid smell of apocalypse is in the air, and self-mutilation comes off as just kinda weird.
Not that they won't go along with it, mind you. They just won't be very enthusiastic, as Kev found out for himself after he handed out the box cutters.
"Somebody fucking do me and let's get the damn show on the road," Kev howled.
Joshua sighed and stepped forward. "Alight fine." He slashed him across the wrists.
"Oh fuck me. I'm not an overachieving teenager trying to cope with my self-esteem issues. Fucking stab me, you pathetic half-apes! What, is it unclear in some way? Here. Let me show you how it's done."
He turned the blade in on himself and drove it into his abdomen. Roaring in gleeful agony, Kev cut upwards and across, dicing his innards in a rise-over-run pattern.
"Okay now y'all take a turn," he laughed blood at them.
A small group clustered around him, jabbing at him with the short, sharp blades. Kev rolled his eyes.
"You people. Seriously. Seek help."
He grabbed onto Ensign Steve's forearm and pulled, leaning hard into her knife, twisting against it, driving it deep into his bowels. In a tuneless staccato marked by the sprays of frothy bloody coming from his mouth, NC Kev sang.
"You do... the... hokey... po... key... Then you turn... Yourself. Around. That's what... it's... all...."
He was still standing up when he died. His intestines were in a pile on the floor, but he was still standing.
NC Kev the impetuous but innocent townie was dead.
balluga watched NC Kev's lynching/suicide pact with a saddened detachment. There wasn't much he could do about it at this point. He had chosen correctly, after all. He watched Adam, the mafia scum of the earth, stand blackhearted and remorseless, a smirking, cocksure participant in the death of an innocent man.
His thoughts elsewhere, balluga didn't even notice someone prick him with a needle on the back of his neck.
Kev was hollering now. balluga sighed. Kev was hurling himself against Ensign Steve, and she was doing a fine job of pretending this wasn't exactly how she and her mafia comrade had planned it.
Everyone turned to stare at him as he bent over double, assailed by a laughing fit that would make any stoner proud. Gasping for air, teers streaming down his face, balluga could not stop laughing at the grisly scene before him. His cheeks strained with the pressure, his lungs burned, his stomach ached like he'd been kicked.
Was it laughter or screaming now? Nobody could tell. Either way it was bloodcurdling, and as balluga fell to the floor, face empurpled and contorted into a grim parody of the comedy mask, only 3 people kept their ears uncovered and eyes on him as he died.
balluga, the innocent townie, was dead.
trillian squatted down to examine the rictus.
"Interesting. I'd say the Happy Joy Poison is definitely a keeper."
She strode over to Adam and Ensign Steve. Traitor and mafia were together again at last. And just in time to slaughter the remaining townies.
"Let's make a quick job of it, shall we?" Adam cocked his gun and shot Leesifer between the eyes.
"Couldn't agree more, brother." Ensign Steve blew MonCapitan's brains out.
trillian snapped Joshua Adams neck like it was a twig. "Yeah, this really has taken way too long already."