Coulson Watches You While You Sleep

[BrotherMan]

I thought the season finale was next week. I were wrong. Without any real spoilers: Someone dies, someone lives, someone saves the day and some asses get kicked. Overall, it was about 50% pretty good and 50% not as pretty good.

Spoilish beyond this point.

For the most part it looks like the Centipede/Extremis/Cybernetics plotlines have been dealt with. Hydra is still out there doing stuff probably. There are a number of villainous villains running around. And also SHIELD is going to be rebuilt. Oh, and there are still mysteries orbiting Coulson and Mary-Skye Poots.

They started laying the groundwork in earnest for some kind of redemption with Woodbored. I'm not buying it and I don't care. I was rooting for and May kinda sorta maybe wanted to keep beating him until he was a pasty smear on the floor. But I can at least be a little happy that he's in jail. (And because SHIELD is being run by verified assholes, he's going to be tortured in some unspeakable manner. I guess I can't complain about it because of my admitted murderous hatred for him.) Evil Ward was the best thing to happen to this series and I'm going to miss him being out in the world being Evil Ward.

I'm also going to miss scenery eating Evil Garret. Wouldn't you know it, just as I'm yelling at the television about how stupid the "Armed Forces" or whoever is supposed to be handling Garret, the most ridiculous and hilarious and funny thing this show has ever done happens. And as hard as I laughed at it and thought that was p good, I also have to admonish (the writers) Coulson for completely stepping over the innocent dead body of whoever Garret killed to deliver his monologue.

Oh, and speaking of Coulson. He's no longer Agent Coulson, but also Avenger Director Coulson. The Big Talk™ he and Fury had was mostly unsatisfying. It basically boils down to Fury thinking Coulson was a p cool dude, so I'm putting you in charge of everthing now. For all the colossal fucking up Coulson and his Agents did, now he's the top dog. Holy shit, no wonder Ultron comes to power and starts fucking shit up. Thing is, Ultron doesn't really even need to be that powerful or clever. At least there are the Avengers to get Coulson's fish out of the fire.

Mary Skye Poots is still snowflaking along just fine. Excise all the stupid special Skye talk from this episode and it's improved by so very much. Thankfully there wasn't a lot of it - but that's still too much. And one of the lead ins to next season is Just How Special is She? I just really don't care anymore. All it's been this season is talk. And after 22 episodes how is it still just talk. Someone please for the love of anything just kill that plot.

One of the things that had me angry at the show was how terribly they used (and ultimately underutilized) Patton Oswalt's Eric Kaenig. I mean, how dumb was it to give Woodbored a thousand chances to answer one fucking question? And then Eric is dead. The half-assed redemption for this error is that Eric has a brother, Billy, who is the Administrative Assistant at some other secret base. (I say brother because LMDs which everyone keeps plotzing about everywhere have not been confirmed in the MCU.)