Best Birther Lunacy Evar

[Vivisectus]

Originally Posted by Stephen Maturin

Alabama's is worse by multiple orders of magnitude (over 800 amendments last time I looked), but we're hardly immune here in Coleradee. Thanks to the relative ease of amending the state constitution, English is the "official language" of our great state. We've also got that lovely anti-gay provision that SCOTUS shot down as violative of the U.S. Constitution awhile back. And don't even get me started on TABOR (taxpayer's bill of rights), thanks to which most 7-year-olds with lemonade stands have greater fiscal clout than our state government.

Fortunately, the electorate has been largely immune to total wingnuttery in recent years. That's a good thing, considering that we'll probably be voting on this abomination come November:

The same assheads proposed a much tamer version of the proposed amendment in 2008 and 2010. The 2008 version netted a yes vote of 20%, but it got close to 30% in 2010. The assheads are all emboldened by the improved showing, so they've horked up the ghastly pile of shit and entrails quoted above.

All that remains to be seen is whether the assheads can get enough valid signatures to get the measure on the ballot. Shouldn't be a problem, sad to say, in light of the fact that they've had little trouble getting signatures in the past.

We have the same idiotic rules here in Ireland too, thanks to the ole Catholic Church. It has some interesting side-effects, like making fertility treatment very expensive.

You see, when they do in vitro fertilization, it is much cheaper to just do 5 or 6 eggs at a time to make sure it works first go. They wait for the first few cell divisions to take place, implant it, and then keep the other 5 frozen in case something goes wrong so they do not need to harvest yet more eggs.

Problem is, according to this law, those cells are legally a person. So once the treatment is successful, the spare cells can not be destroyed but have to be stored in a freezer ad infinitum.

This leads to several interesting problems. First off: does this means that legally, if I freeze someone and just never let them thaw out, I am not guilty of murder? Would it count as kidnapping in stead?

Secondly, since these persons are clearly minors, who has custody over them? Already we have seen a case here where a woman went to court to claim "ownership" of her fertilized eggs. She has divorced the husband, whose sperm had been used to fertilize them, and claimed that those eggs were her only chance at more children. The husband said that since it was his genetic material, he would feel the resulting children would be his, and that he had a right not to have any more children with a woman he was no longer married to.

Extending the idea of personhood further - can we ever deny these cell-clump persons the right to a normal life, should wombs be available for them? So if you have any frozen, viable embryos in the freezer, are we not automatically making it illegal not to to give these up to someone who wants to have a baby and is willing to carry it? In essence, it means that your generic material is not your own once it has fertilized someone else's.

Moving a step further - what if this little clump of cells has a genetic problem? Are we now compelled to carry trizomy-18 babies to full term? And this is where these laws REALLY piss me off - are people now compelled, because they tried to reproduce, to carry a baby to full term who has absolutely NOTHING in his or her future but a small handful of years full of painful illnesses and extensive surgeries? Who would not choose to simply not live in stead of facing such torture, and hopeless torture: only a small percent of these children even live into their teens.

the "Sanctity of life" bullshit is not clearly thought through. If you want to make laws like this, you must immediately forbid all in-vitro fertilization, unless ALL viable embryos are used immediately. Also, the state has a duty to protect ALL it's citizens, so I think it would be best if we placed all expecting mothers under extensive mandatory screening to make sure they do not do anything that could harm the baby. Smoking, drinking alcohol or caffeine is to be made illegal for pregnant women. Come to think of it, we should also keep them from leaving the state - if they DO try this, we can simply call it abduction.

[SR71]

Lord Monckton, one of my main squeezes in the climate debate, has issues with the birf certificate! The layers, oh god, the layers. Look at the layers!

Lord Monckton | Obama Birth Certificate | Global Warming | The Daily Caller

“It appears in layers on the screen in such a way you can remove quite separately each of the individual dates,” Monckton said. “You use Adobe Illustrator and each of the individual dates is in its own separate layer. This thing has been fabricated. Sheriff [Joe] Arpaio of Arizona has had a team on this for six months. And he has now gone public and said there’s something very desperately wrong with this and of course nobody is saying anything because the entire electorate has been fooled.”

OMG YOU CAN MOVE THE DATES AROUND! HOW CAN IT BE RILL IF YOU CAN MOVE THE DATES? OMG THE KENYAN!!!

[seebs]

Wow, it's like scanned documents are new!

[SR71]

You can just pick up a date and move it around, like it was a cat or something! OMG!

[Angakuk]

Or even Lisarea!

[Jerome]

The USPS has less than 30 days to investigate the fraud.

[ChuckF]

After that, all sworn affidational information becomes foundational in reference for the legal pursuits of others in regard to this subject matter!

[livius drusus]

Subject matter! Su-su-su-su subject matter!

[ChuckF]

BREAKING IT DOWN ITT

[Pyrrho]

Originally Posted by SR71

Lord Monckton, one of my main squeezes in the climate debate, has issues with the birf certificate! The layers, oh god, the layers. Look at the layers!

Lord Monckton | Obama Birth Certificate | Global Warming | The Daily Caller

OMG YOU CAN MOVE THE DATES AROUND! HOW CAN IT BE RILL IF YOU CAN MOVE THE DATES? OMG THE KENYAN!!!

Yet another idiot who knows nothing about transparency flattening in Adobe Acrobat, or how to use Adobe Illustrator in a civilized way.

And, yes, I would call him an idiot to his face.

[Pyrrho]

Originally Posted by JEROME DA GNOME

The USPS has less than 30 days to investigate the fraud.

What, did Obama's mother use a wet sponge instead of licking the stamp like a good red-blooded patriotic US of American?

[Zehava]

Originally Posted by Pyrrho

What, did Obama's mother use a wet sponge instead of licking the stamp like a good red-blooded patriotic US of American?

Who the fuck licks stamps anymore, they are are self adhesive these days. We Americans have gotten way to lazy to lick our own stamps.

[Pyrrho]

Originally Posted by Zehava

Who the fuck licks stamps anymore, they are are self adhesive these days. We Americans have gotten way to lazy to lick our own stamps.

So, you deny it! Duly noted.

[seebs]

I'm just wondering what "fraud" the USPS would investigate, and why there would be a 30-day deadline.

[Pyrrho]

One of the claims is that Obama's draft card is also fake, and that an altered USPS stamp was used. Where the 30-day deadline comes from, I have no idea, unless it's the USPS service by which you can have your mail held at the post office for 30 days if you're traveling?

[LadyShea]

Originally Posted by JEROME DA GNOME

The USPS has less than 30 days to investigate the fraud.

30 days from when? How was the 30 days legally triggered?

[Jerome]

Originally Posted by Pyrrho

What, did Obama's mother use a wet sponge instead of licking the stamp like a good red-blooded patriotic US of American?

The postal stamp on the selective service card Obama presented is a forgery.

[Jerome]

Originally Posted by LadyShea

30 days from when? How was the 30 days legally triggered?

It is the deadline the Sheriff put in place as a professional courtesy.

[Angakuk]

Originally Posted by JEROME DA GNOME

The postal stamp on the selective service card Obama presented is a forgery.

Thanks. Some of us have been wondering about that. It is a great relief to have your authoritative confirmation.

[Jerome]

You are welcome.

[Angakuk]

Originally Posted by JEROME DA GNOME

It is the deadline the Sheriff put in place as a professional courtesy.

If, at the expiration of that time period, the USPS has not acted just what does the esteemed sheriff of Maricopa County propose to do about it? Is he going to issue the Postmaster General a set of pink underwear and send him to live in a tent?

[ChuckF]

Originally Posted by JEROME DA GNOME

It is the deadline the Sheriff put in place as a professional courtesy.

[seebs]

So there is no actual legal deadline involved. I also don't see any evidence on offer that this is a forgery -- and given that the previous forgery claims have come down to people not knowing how PDFs are made...

[Stephen Maturin]

Originally Posted by seebs

Wow, it's like scanned documents are new!

As Ari wrote back in May of 2011:

Wait, fucking seriously? Obama isn't really our president because this dumbass doesn't know how a copy machine works?

The more things change, the more they ... well ... haven't actually changed at all.

[Watser?]

What is the penalty for forging a stamp? Capital punishment I hope?