A farmer had several pullets and a number of roosters.
The farmer kept records and any rooster who didn't perform went into the soup pot and was replaced. The farmer bought a tiny set of bells to attach to the roosters, each having its own tone. This way he could tell who was performing without having to be present all the time.
His favorite rooster, Butch, was a very fine rooster. One morning, the farmer hadn't heard Butch's bell at all, so he went to investigate. The other roosters were chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing. The pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover. To the farmer's amazement, old Butch had his bell in his beak so it couldn't ring. He would sneak up on a pullet, do his job, and walk on to the next one. The farmer was so proud of Butch, he entered him into the county fair and Butch became an overnight sensation among the judges.
The result.....
The judges not only awarded old Butch the No Bell Piece Prize but they awarded him the Pulletsurprise was well. Clearly old Butch was a politician in the making. Who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention!
"What is the difference between erotic and kinky? Erotic is where you do something rather wonderful with a single feather. Kinky, on the other hand, is where you use the whole chicken!" Willie Rushton
One day, a librarian looks up to see a chicken standing in front of her desk. The chicken looks at her and says, "Bok."
Somewhat taken aback, the librarian asks, "You want a book?". The chicken replies, "Bok." So, the librarian hands the chicken a book. She tucks it under her wing and walks out the door.
The next day, the same chicken comes back, with the book under her wing. She drops the book in the "Returns" bin and then says, "Bok, Bok".
"You want two books now?" the librarian asks. "Bok, Bok," replies the chicken. So, the librarian hands the chicken two books. She tucks them both under her wing and walks out the door.
The next day, the chicken returns, with the books. She comes up to the counter and says, "Bok, Bok, Boooook!".
"What's that?" asks the librarian -- you want three books; two short books and a long one?" "Bok, Bok, Booook" replies the chicken. So, the librarian hands the chicken three books, two short ones and a long one. The chicken tucks the books under her wings and heads for the door.
By now, the librarian is understandably curious as to what's going on, so she decides to follow the chicken. The chicken heads out of the library, across the street, and down into a swampy area, with the librarian following behind.
When she reaches the swamp, the chicken approaches a large frog. She takes the books from under her wings and places them in front of the frog. As she places each book in front of the frog, he glances at it and says, "Reddit ... Reddit ..."
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“The greatest way to live with honor in this world is to be what we pretend to be.”