Member News Discussion

[Anastasia Beaverhausen]

I've been there. If you guys are committed to making it work (and I think you are right for each other), it is worth it. Feel free to commiserate with me if you need.

[Mark Dreher]

Oh

What a lucky man, he was.

Till

"A bullet, had found him"

No money

Could save him.

So, he laid down!!!!!!!!!!

And he died.

Lucky Man

[Mark Dreher]

Originally Posted by Novowels

Hey folks, long time.

It's been an interesting few years for me. juiblex and I became engaged and I applied for my Australian visa in 2011 and everything seemed to be going fairly well. I quit my job and started selling things until I was down to some electronics and two suitcases worth of clothes. Unfortunately during the approval process my father was diagnosed with frontotemporal lobar degeneration, explaining the memory and language issues that had become noticeable in the last few years.

Tried to juggle both setting up care for my father and working on the move/wedding etc and it just wasn't going to happen, I had to make a choice. My father was given less than 5 years to live, and the last couple of years especially were going to be hard -- FTD causes loss of language, dementia, wild mood swings including paranoia and anger, and issues with balance and coordination that just get worse and worse until the body shuts down.

After the visa was approved I traveled to Sydney to visit 'blex but we agreed that at this point I needed to look after my father and spend what time was left with him. The visa office was nice, but they basically said they were not able to extend my visa for an unspecified amount of time (can't really blame them) so I was going to have to just let it expire. 'blex and I also decided that the distance (which had taken it's tolls already) was going to be too difficult to maintain and decided to end our relationship. We still talk occasionally. She has had some health issues but overall is doing well.

I moved back to my father's house in my small hometown and along with my aunt, we began the process of preparing for the end. My aunt, who was always very close to him and had just gotten divorced, became his primary caregiver while I worked a couple of part time jobs to foot the few bills we had left and assisted where I could.

In June 2014, my Grandmother passed away. By that point my father did not recognize most of his friends and family, was nearly impossible to communicate with, and needed assistance walking. He was quiet and respectful but seemed mostly bewildered by the service. After the funeral we spent most of our time at home, and issues like not being able to make it to the bathroom in time and becoming angry and violent when attempting to get him to change clothes or bathe were starting to become commonplace. He was convinced that people were trying to kill him, and constantly wanted to "go home" even though we were in the house he had lived in for over 30 years.

My father passed away in November. He would have been 60 in December. I had to stand in a suit in front of family and friends at 33 years old and tell them what they already knew -- that my father was a good man, and that he would be missed. Then we buried him.

Since then I have been dealing with his estate, looking at my future again -- got interested in going into the veterinary field in some capacity, and trying to get back into contact with friends that I had become distant from both online and off. I'd like to think that many of you are or were friends, even if things got weird there at the end, so wanted to stop in and say hey.

sweetie, don't be crazy
what do you want
i'll be good

[JoeP]

Originally Posted by huntress

The final straw, though, was when she added, "This is just another data point, Diana."

Another data point?! WTF does that mean?

"just another data point" would be a great custom user title.

[Anastasia Beaverhausen]

Jesus, vremya. I've had so many friends on another forum diagnosed with cancer this year.

[huntress]

Originally Posted by JoeP

"just another data point" would be a great custom user title.

One of my good friends at work has been calling me "data point" for a few weeks now.

I added it to my Facebook profile.

d

[BrotherMan]

Data point?

show spoiler

[viscousmemories]

Ang, I'm glad to hear your wife is doing better and good luck with the diet and exercise. Lord knows I struggle with that myself; I'm lucky I haven't been forced to change yet.

Vremya, glad it's not more serious. Hope it stays that way!

[ShottleBop]

Angakuk: if your wife is diagnosed as Type II: check our The First Year: Type 2 Diabetes: An Essential Guide for the Newly Diagnosed, by Gretchen Becker. It's an excellent introduction.

No matter which type of diabetes your wife has, check out Dr. Richard K. Bernstein's The Diabetes Solution: The Complete Guide to Achieving Normal Blood Sugars. It's a great resource.

If your wife is interested, I can recommend a few online forums dedicated to the subject. Fortunately, for most folks so motivated, diabetes can be managed pretty well.

[vremya]

If I had to do chemo I was going to make a point of posting The Return of Chemo Fist. But now I won't get to.

Srsly, this is probably the best possible scenario I could have needed up with, short of "oops, we made a mistake, there's really nothing there." I'm really, really relieved and happy.

[erimir]

:chemofistbump:

[One for Sorrow]

Oh shit that's awful JD. I am so sorry.

[Ymir's blood]

ES

[Qingdai]

Crap, Sorry ES. I don't know what to say.

[Watser?]

Ow man, sorry ES

[curses]

Oh ES, I'm sorry. doesn't even begin to cover it.

[Ari]

Hugs!
Dear universe stop fucking with my friends!

[Anastasia Beaverhausen]

I'm so sorry, ES.

[LadyShea]

Omg ES that is horrible news. How is mama holding up?

[Stormlight]

Oh man, ES. I'm so sorry.

[JoeP]

That's awful ES.

Hold on, you know some of the group are dead, but you haven't been given the names yet? Sounds like Kafka and Schrödinger have been conferring.

[JoeP]

And Ro ... could you return with some good news sometime? How's the babby?

[slimshady2357]

4 Dead and 3 missing now

Brutal.

[Roland98]

Originally Posted by JoeP

And Ro ... could you return with some good news sometime? How's the babby?

I know But babby is good. He's almost 21 months now and talking up a storm. Pic attached from summer vacation with older brother (13). Daughter will be 16 in December and got her learner's permit in June.

[LadyShea]

Looks like probably suicide?

And she is not 16, shut up...where does the time go?