New And Improved Rant Thread, now with 50% more profanity! - Page 11

Sock Puppet · #**251** 04-09-2009, 03:12 PM

Fuck you, alarm clock. I reset your stupid ass properly last night. So why didn't you go off this morning? Huh? I suppose you're going to tell me that although I thought I'd turned you on at the same time I reset you, I actually didn't. Somehow that's MY fault. Dammit, just do what I want you to do and don't rely on my hamster-wheel-powered memory to make sure your fucking switch is in the right position.

And YOU, brain? I'm not even talking to you right now.

Dingfod · #**252** 04-09-2009, 03:14 PM

I took some pictures with my phone yesterday and I can't fucking text them to Twitter.

curses · #**253** 04-09-2009, 03:52 PM

I'm trying to be mad and ranty but I'm just too tired. I wish the tired would go away.

Ymir's blood · #**254** 04-09-2009, 10:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Caligulette

They make phones without cameras? I'd kind of like one because I have enough random pictures of the space between my thumb and forefinger, thanks.

So put 'em in the gallery and call it 'digital modern.'

Quote:

Originally Posted by curses

I'm trying to be mad and ranty but I'm just too tired. I wish the tired would go away.

Watser? · #**255** 04-09-2009, 10:44 PM

I bought a new phone in a local telephone shop for 19 euros cheaper :gasp:

And with the 19 euros I bought a new second hand cd player which is perfect :larrybounce:

Quote:

Originally Posted by curses

I'm trying to be mad and ranty but I'm just too tired. I wish the tired would go away.

Zehava · #**256** 04-09-2009, 10:50 PM

Two rants, one work related (yeah like you are surprised) and the other traffic related.

Dear choad sucking fellow employee,

When I created the print queues you requested I created them using a naming convention that we use as a corporate standard. I don't care that you wanted them named with your super special secret naming convention, standards are there for a reason. Reasons I explained when I told you I used different names for the printers.

You should just accept that rather than go whine to your manager that you are not being helped because your manager will call my manager and my manager will wonder why I haven't done anything to help you yet. I'll then get to explain how you suck choad, but in the end you will win and I will have to break standards for you. I hope you are happy, choad sucker.

====
To the person driving to my right, in the right hand lane of a two lane right turn,

If you really wanted to go straight through the intersection you should have gotten in my lane rather then the right lane. See your lane is a right turn only, mine is straight through the intersection or a right turn. I happen to want to turn right. Why am I in this and not the far right one? because less than 1/2 mile down the road I have to merge LEFT onto the freeway and really don't want to try to cross 2 lanes or traffic in less then 100 yards to do it.

Signaling to make a left turn from the right turn only lane isn't going to help your situation, especially when you don't signal until AFTER the light has changed. Fuck no I am not going to let you in and that dirty look and cursing I see you doing doesn't earn you any sympathy. You'll have to take the next exit and circle back around to try again. Maybe this time you can get it right.

Sock Puppet · #**257** 04-10-2009, 01:48 PM

You paranoid, nutbag, fucknut crazy pus-sucking bitch. Do you really think what you just did would actually help anybody in the situation? Or are you just being a toxic, vampiric asshole? Have you noticed that you're now down to ONE family on the block who will even fucking TALK to you? It's time to take your bipolar disorder, your fundy "values," your fucked-up inbred brood, and your wild accusations, and move the fuck out of the neighborhood. I'll help you pack by finding out how much fits up your asshole, and get you started on momentum with my boot.

Either that or just let my wife kill you. You seriously fucked with the wrong people. I have no resentment toward your kids (although there's too many of them and you should never have reproduced at all, that's not their fault), but it will take conscious effort on my part to brake if I see you crossing the street.

vremya · #**258** 04-10-2009, 03:36 PM

I don't have a magic wand that's going to get your kids back, lady. We scheduled a hearing, I'm working my ass off on your motion papers (you're probably going to lose - I can't seem to get that through to you) and that's all I can do. If you don't like the way your case is going, pony up the bucks and get a paying lawyer, not an overloaded student attorney.

SharonDee · #**259** 04-10-2009, 07:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sock Puppet

I'll help you pack by finding out how much fits up your asshole, and get you started on momentum with my boot.

Quoting because I don't want to forget this golden nugget. :appl:

curses · #**260** 04-10-2009, 10:56 PM

Woohoo! Tornado time! I hate spring.

wildernesse · #**261** 04-11-2009, 04:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vremya

I don't have a magic wand that's going to get your kids back, lady. We scheduled a hearing, I'm working my ass off on your motion papers (you're probably going to lose - I can't seem to get that through to you) and that's all I can do. If you don't like the way your case is going, pony up the bucks and get a paying lawyer, not an overloaded student attorney.

Hey, don't let them throw you off with a magic wand! Make sure you hold out for the time machine as well.

Dingfod · #**262** 04-11-2009, 11:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by curses

Woohoo! Tornado time! I hate spring.

Are y'all alright?

Link to thread on the subject.

Garnet · #**263** 04-11-2009, 08:45 PM

Knees fucked. Check.

Have version 2.2 of the plague. :achoo:

Check.

Laptop graphics card fucked rendering laptop unusable. Check.

OK, so trouble is supposed to come in threes, right? So, I'm done now, RIGHT?

Zehava · #**264** 04-15-2009, 05:30 PM

I know I complain about my job a lot in this thread, actually it's the users that are a thorn in my side.

Today's thorn number 1:

User calls in 4/13 to complain that he has not received any email on his BlackBerry for several days. I check the management software and I see contact with the device today and messages forwarded to device ~5 minutes ago. So it appears to be working again.

Then this catches my eye, some statistics on his account:

Messages forwarded to the device: 7088
Messages sent from device: 1

And just why the fuck do you have a BlackBerry if all you are using it for is to READ email that you can just as easily read on the god damn thin client you are logged into?

Listen fuckwad, that device costs anywhere from $100 - $150, plus either $45 or $65 per month for the data plan all apparently so you don't have to be at your computer to READ your email. And people wonder why we've had financial problems for the last few years. Granted I cannot tell how much you actually use the phone part of the BlackBerry from these stats, but for fucks sake there are much cheaper devices you could get if all you need is a fucking cell phone.

:asshat:

Dingfod · #**265** 04-15-2009, 05:33 PM

I have to ask why hadn't he received any emails for a couple days?

Zehava · #**266** 04-15-2009, 05:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dingfod

I have to ask why hadn't he received any emails for a couple days?

I don't know I haven't called him yet, I'm waiting until I calm down a little more. Most likely he just had to soft reset the device to get it working again.

ETA: Oh shit it gets better. I tried to call the BlackBerry as he listed that as his preferred contact number. Of course he did not answer and he hasn't even setup his voice mail yet. :asshat:

x2

ETA2: :asshat:

is on vacation this week, and was when he called in on the 13th. Sent him an email noting that it appears to be working at this time and closed his ticket.

Dingfod · #**267** 04-15-2009, 05:43 PM

We have a winner! Give that man a cigar! And take away his Blackberry, right now, preferably.

Smilin · #**268** 04-15-2009, 09:29 PM

You fucking moron....

WHAT DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND ABOUT NOT TAKING YOUR CELL PHONE INTO THE OPERATING PLANT AREA?

If you HAVE to fucking take it,,,at least put the gogdamn thing on vibrate...

and WHAT KIND OF GAY RINGTONE WAS THAT?

And as soon as your cell phone goes off and you TAKE YOUR FUCKING TIME TO SILENCE the damm thing, your pager immediately starts going off. I realize that you're just so important that you need your damm cell phone and pager on in AN ALL HANDS QUALITY STANDDOWN MEETING...

If I had been the project manager, I'd have made an example of your sorry ass....

And then you fucking fall asleep afterwards....you slothful piece of shit...

vremya · #**269** 04-18-2009, 04:12 PM

Look lady, I AM taking my client's situation seriously, but dealing with a totally negative person who shoots down every single suggestion I have for getting her sorry ass out of the mess it's in is really draining. I'm behind on my rent too, so where's my fucking fairy godmother?

Qingdai · #**270** 04-18-2009, 04:31 PM

Child of mine, Yelling at me at the top of your lungs that you are sorry for yelling is not helping.

Watser? · #**271** 04-18-2009, 05:00 PM

vremya · #**272** 04-18-2009, 06:24 PM

Megatron · #**273** 04-18-2009, 06:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Smilin

and WHAT KIND OF GAY RINGTONE WAS THAT?

Best part of the whole rant :lmao:

seebs · #**274** 04-18-2009, 06:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zehava

And just why the fuck do you have a BlackBerry if all you are using it for is to READ email that you can just as easily read on the god damn thin client you are logged into?

Listen fuckwad, that device costs anywhere from $100 - $150, plus either $45 or $65 per month for the data plan all apparently so you don't have to be at your computer to READ your email. And people wonder why we've had financial problems for the last few years. Granted I cannot tell how much you actually use the phone part of the BlackBerry from these stats, but for fucks sake there are much cheaper devices you could get if all you need is a fucking cell phone.

I got a blackberry from work. I send very little mail from it.

BUT.

1. It synchronizes with the outlook server, which I otherwise have trouble working with. This means my meeting attendence information is now available to other people.
2. For that matter, I can tag personal appointments on it, and other people can see when I'm going to be OOO.
3. Notifying me of things is itself extremely useful. If I go out to lunch, or I go out running errands, email coming to the phone can let me know that I should be changing my plans and getting back to the network in an emergency.
4. We cancelled my office land line, because hey, I have a phone. This actually means that we may well be saving money on the deal anyway.

Dingfod · #**275** 04-18-2009, 06:54 PM

Why is everyone so scared of filing their IRS tax forms late? Boy have they got the American taxpayer buffaloed, there is no penalty if you're getting a refund and the penalty for late filing is 10% of the taxes owed up to $100 maximum. Shit, if I had known that before it would've eliminated that last minute rush down the post office and/or putting excess postage on it because not wanting to be bothered with actually going into a post office during their business hours. In fact the risk of getting caught not filing or not paying isn't as great as one might think.