Only in Oklahoma...

[Ymir's blood]

Enough explosives to blow up an acre of Warr!

[Dingfod]

Originally Posted by Dingfod

T. Bone returned the signed chunk of concrete to Holdenville, confident in his team of crack lawyers ability to win it back for him in a court of law.

The snatched signature slab is back in the possession of the homeowner from whom it was taken.

[Dingfod]

Man shot multiple times at Tulsa's Chicken Hut restaurant at 3:00 AM, dies.
Over 100 witnesses, only one 911 call.
No one helping the victim, not even the relative that was the only one that would talk to the police.
People stepped over the victim on the ground to get their food at the take-out window and shoved EMTs out of the way too.

[Ymir's blood]

[Dingfod]

Originally Posted by Dingfod

It's now open.

Pops expects to sell its millionth bottle of soda pop this week. The lucky millionth bottle purchaser will get 66 burgers and fries, 66 scoops of ice cream, and 2400 miles worth of gasoline (the length of Route 66).

[Dingfod]

A stick off "The Last Tree in the Universe" is not acceptable payment at the Oklahoma County jail, especially when you haven't even been arrested for doing donuts in your truck in the civic center parking lot and high-centering it on a trash can. However, throw a brick through a window, we're all over you. The stick though, you can toss it into that trash can under your truck over there.

[Dingfod]

I bet he won't do that again..

JOHNSTON COUNTY, OK - A bobcat climbed a power pole and touched two power lines, knocking out electrical power to thousands in three towns in Southern Oklahoma.

[Dingfod]

Oklahoma lawmaker switched Obama portrait in Capitol Building House chamber for one of current Gov. Brad Henry. He said his disagreement about health care reform was the sole motivation for his very childish behavior. Hypocritically, he claimed to respect the office of the President.

[Dingfod]

Abandoned Oklahoma

[Dingfod]

Tulsa's Sandy Point Apartments is a neighborhood divided. Their version of the Jets and Sharks decided to select champions to fight instead of an all-out rumble. They met in a common area and the fight was on until some clown with a gun fired a shot into the air, sending the combatants and their supporters scrambling before the coppers made the scene. Calls to police alleged two people were shot, but no victims or shooters were found, nor was any evidence anyone had been shot. And nobody is talking, of course, they know the first rule of Fight Club.

[Dingfod]

Man who fought to get "IM GAY" personalized license plate was found dead Wednesday morning, this after filing a complaint that he was roughed up during scuffle with Tulsa police and called derogatory names about his homosexuality over the weekend. Tulsa police spokesman Jason Willingham said "There are gay police officers in Tulsa, I don't think any Tulsa police officer would say anything homophobic."

Yeah, right. And because there are black police officers no Tulsa police officers would say anything racist? Not likely.

[Dingfod]

Burglar brings sword to a gunfight, gets wounded for his efforts. Pulls gun of his own, gets shot in head as a great big thank you for escalating the level of violence in someone else's home, gets last laugh by dying, not prosecuted. Police say they believe homeowner was defending themselves legally.

[Dingfod]

Man goes to Tulsa airport at 8:20 PM and says he has a bomb in his gym bag, threatens to detonate it, then runs away. Airport was not evacuated, the man was caught and there were no explosives. Not much of anybody was in danger, if you've ever flown into Tulsa, you'd know there isn't hardly a damn thing going on that late.

[D. Scarlatti]

Sen. Coburn sustains severe head injury

[Dingfod]

Oklahoma City man says his fart fetish got him sexually assaulted. He exchanged text messages, then met with a man who threatened to beat him up if he left, then sexually assaulted him. Once finished the perp told the victim to leave because the perp's mother was going to be getting up to go to work. The victim told police "I thought we could just fart and be friends."

[Dingfod]

Originally Posted by D. Scarlatti

Sen. Coburn sustains severe head injury

I read that last night and thought it must be a mistake.

[Dingfod]

If you were planning to engineer your own centaur in Oklahoma, forget it, there shall be no human-animal hybrids in this here state.

[Ymir's blood]

But humans are animals, except for when they're Terri Schiavo.

[Dingfod]

[Dingfod]

Noise? I thought they said he had too much nose. Man cut off his customer's nose in spite of his business.

Manager attacks bar patrons with sword because they were allegedly "making too much noise", cutting off the nose of one customer. Bar manager Adan Zapata has been jailed on charges relating to this incident. One witness thought the victim was lucky to be alive, not only was his nose cut off, but he had wounds on his shoulder and neck. A friend of the victim said doctors built a new nose out of skin from his forehead and ear.


Damn pesky customers are the only thing keeping him from having a nice quiet business.

[Dingfod]

Oklahoma Tax Commission received a Muzzle Award by the Thomas Jefferson Center for the Protection of Free Expression for denying a resident a vanity license plate reading “IM GAY,” while allowing heterosexual lifestyle plates such as “STR8FAN” and “STR8SXI". They join such esteemed company as U.S. Rep Alan Grayson (R-Eally?) for asking Attorney General Eric Holder to investigate a parody website and California's Southwestern College for restricting protesters to a "free speech patio".


Good for the state tax commission, something like that on a license plate could get a guy killed, or hassled by the cops.

[Skeeve]

Originally Posted by Dingfod

They join such esteemed company as U.S. Rep Alan Grayson (R-Eally?)

I'm confused. Was the above (R-Eally?) a dig on Democratic Grayson or a mistaken party affiliation?

[Nullifidian]

Originally Posted by Skeeve

I'm confused. Was the above (R-Eally?) a dig on Democratic Grayson or a mistaken party affiliation?

I'll give you a hint: there is no community in Florida named Eally.

[Skeeve]

Originally Posted by Nullifidian

I'll give you a hint: there is no community in Florida named Eally.

I'm aware of this.

Since Grayson is a Dem, I would have expected (D-umbass) or something similar.

Using R didn't make sense, hence my confusion.

I guess only Dingfod knows for sure.

[Dingfod]

Originally Posted by Skeeve

I'm confused. Was the above (R-Eally?) a dig on Democratic Grayson or a mistaken party affiliation?

No, I'm just an idiot.