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01-08-2017, 04:13 PM
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Just keep m'nose clean, egg, chips & beans, I'm always full of steam
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: so far out, I'm too far in
Gender: Bender
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
The Pug, currently sleeping on my lap, just snored the first 5 notes of the theme song for the original 70s Night Gallery. With perfect pitch and tempo.
__________________
"Her eyes in certain light were violet, and all her teeth were even. That's a rare, fair feature: even teeth. She smiled to excess, but she chewed with real distinction." - Eleanor of Aquitaine
...........
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01-08-2017, 04:49 PM
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Adequately Crumbulent
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Cascadia
Gender: Male
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
Shameless Thanks Grabbing Day!
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01-08-2017, 09:56 PM
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NeoTillichian Hierophant & Partisan Hack
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Iowa
Gender: Male
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sock Puppet
The Pug, currently sleeping on my lap, just snored the first 5 notes of the theme song for the original 70s Night Gallery. With perfect pitch and tempo.
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I can name that tune in 3 snores.
__________________
Old Pain In The Ass says: I am on a mission from God to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable; to bring faith to the doubtful and doubt to the faithful.
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01-10-2017, 05:02 AM
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I read some of your foolish scree, then just skimmed the rest.
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Bay Area
Gender: Male
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
When browsing the youtube comments I've noticed a growing trend of people/bots posting affirming things under horrible names. Like, in reply to a comment, "AGoodOvenIsFullOfJews said, 'Excellent post, you have firm reasoning which will benefit you throughout the day." Often feeling fortune cookiey but sincere and not sarcastic.
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01-19-2017, 07:32 PM
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Bizarre unknowable space alien
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Flint, MI
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
Yesterday, for no reason I ever learned, there was a box of Jello instant vanilla pudding stuck in the handrail on our elevator. I noticed it when I went up to lunch, and when I came down it was in a different position. So someone checked it out and then just put it back. It made me and most of the people I told about it laugh way more than we probably should.
__________________
"freedom to differ is not limited to things that do not matter much. That would be a mere shadow of freedom. The test of its substance is the right to differ as to things that touch the heart of the existing order."
- Justice Robert Jackson, West Virginia State Board of Ed. v. Barnette
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06-14-2017, 10:43 PM
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Forum Killer
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
My dirt devil just ate a sock.
Not choked on, just ate it, swhumph, gone. I didn't have time to react.
It can keep it. I don't want it back that badly.
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11-08-2017, 10:55 PM
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Solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
So I'm driving down this sort of boring stretch of road today, and there's an SUV in front of me with a bumpersticker that says, "Suck it up, Buttercup," except all caps, really big. And that's the only sticker, too, so it wasn't one of those things where someone gets every mildly amusing sticker they see and puts it on their car. This was a sentiment so important to this person that she found it necessary to broadcast it to everyone who saw her on the road. Not directed to anyone in particular, really, unless "Buttercup" counts, which it doesn't. This is the main thing this woman wanted to say to the world.
"Huh," I thought to myself.
And then, the greatest thing happened. She ended up in a turn only lane when she wanted to go straight. This is a boring stretch of road, but it's pretty busy at this point. And rather than, oh, say, sucking it up, accepting that she made a mistake, and suffering the mild inconvenience of making the unwanted turn and then getting reoriented and back in the direction she meant to go, she stopped in the middle of the road. Just stopped in 40MPHish traffic, backed up everyone else in her lane, put her turn signal on (I think), and wedged her way into the lane she wanted to be in, subsequently backing them up as well and making a bunch of people miss their green lights.
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11-08-2017, 11:04 PM
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Shitpost Sommelier
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
__________________
Peering from the top of Mount Stupid
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11-09-2017, 01:40 AM
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Fishy mokey
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Furrin parts
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
It is always someone else who is supposed to suck it up.
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11-09-2017, 02:25 PM
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ChuckF's sock
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Join Date: Dec 2016
Gender: Female
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
Quote:
Originally Posted by Janet
Yesterday, for no reason I ever learned, there was a box of Jello instant vanilla pudding stuck in the handrail on our elevator..
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Yesterday, in a public washroom there was 2 boxes of dry macaroni perched on the hand dryer.
__________________
#jeSuisLimoncello
..
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11-09-2017, 05:05 PM
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Solipsist
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Kolmannessa kerroksessa
Gender: Male
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
Well obviously it was dry.
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11-10-2017, 10:18 AM
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Dissonance is its own reward
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: World's End, NY
Gender: Bender
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
Some guy left a business card on the urinal at my job yesterday. It had the usual stuff, name/number/company, but I had no idea what the company was.
A quick search on my phone later, I realize the company sells bathroom supplies. I guess that was pretty clever?
__________________
Father Helel, save us from the dark.
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07-05-2018, 11:23 PM
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Solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
Right after the election, I put an anti-Trump sign up facing the street, and decided to leave it up until it's irrelevant, so it's been there ever since. We've had several people compliment it and we even got a very thoughtful anonymous thank you card. But also, someone egged and TPed our house in the middle of the night last fourth of July.
So this year, I was kind of wondering if they'd do it again, but I wasn't too worried about it. It was a minor pain in the ass, but it was also pretty funny that someone was so angry that they went to the trouble and risk of doing that. I figured it was just some dumb kids or something.
Anyhows, we usually have a bunch of people come over on the 4th because our city has a big community event right by our house so you can watch fireworks right from the house, and we even let a couple of our friends park in our driveway. So we had people over and ate a bunch of food and watched fireworks, and there were a couple people still here playing video games when I went to bed.
A little bit atter I'd gone to bed, one of the people playing video games, a maybe 90 pound woman named Tiffany, heard a noise outside and tore straight out to find a grown assed man just starting to TP our tree, and scared him so he ran down the street, dropping his vandalism supplies.
And wait for it. It was toilet paper with Trump's face on it, which I'm assuming he thought was an endorsement of Trump. Like maybe he didn't pick up on the subtle implications of that or something.
I mean, I'm not wanting Tiffany to be running around chasing Magas around in the middle of the night anymore, but it is funny as hell that it happened.
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Thanks, from:
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Ari (07-05-2018), BrotherMan (07-06-2018), But (07-06-2018), Corona688 (02-09-2019), Crumb (07-05-2018), JoeP (07-06-2018), Kamilah Hauptmann (07-05-2018), Qingdai (09-29-2019), slimshady2357 (07-06-2018), Sock Puppet (07-05-2018), SR71 (10-15-2019), Stormlight (07-06-2018)
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07-05-2018, 11:56 PM
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I read some of your foolish scree, then just skimmed the rest.
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Bay Area
Gender: Male
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
They TP one of ours, you send five of theirs to the morgue, that's the Tiffany way!
Too bad he ran, I would be like "continue, but we're going to pull up chairs and critique your TP throwing, show us whatcha got!!"
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07-06-2018, 01:31 AM
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Shitpost Sommelier
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ari
They TP one of ours, you send five of theirs to the morgue, that's the Tiffany way!
Too bad he ran, I would be like "continue, but we're going to pull up chairs and critique your TP throwing, show us whatcha got!!"
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Eva Peron
Answer violence with violence. If one of us falls today, five of them must fall tomorrow.
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I'm amused by dictator quotes.
__________________
Peering from the top of Mount Stupid
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07-06-2018, 01:55 AM
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I read some of your foolish scree, then just skimmed the rest.
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Bay Area
Gender: Male
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kamilah Hauptmann
Quote:
Originally Posted by Eva Peron
Answer violence with violence. If one of us falls today, five of them must fall tomorrow.
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I'm amused by dictator quotes.
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Woah! I didn't realize that was an actual quote from the time!
I was referencing Sean Connory in The Untouchables "He pulls a knife, you pull a gun, he sends one of yours to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue. That's the Chicago way."
At one point, Peron's quote of 5 somehow got mixed into the Untouchables line as I've heard people quote it in the untouchables.
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09-18-2019, 06:34 PM
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Solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
I just searched on a number that called me and found it on nomorobo. They had a transcript, which begins, "Hi It's your congressman Jonah goose."
And I will never be able to think of him as Joe Neguse again.
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Thanks, from:
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chunksmediocrites (12-27-2019), Corona688 (09-28-2019), JoeP (09-18-2019), Kamilah Hauptmann (09-19-2019), Qingdai (09-29-2019), Sock Puppet (09-19-2019), SR71 (10-12-2019), Stephen Maturin (09-18-2019), Stormlight (09-19-2019), The Man (11-04-2019), Ymir's blood (09-20-2019)
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10-04-2019, 06:39 PM
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Forum Killer
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
Quote:
Originally Posted by Megatron
Some guy left a business card on the urinal at my job yesterday. It had the usual stuff, name/number/company, but I had no idea what the company was.
A quick search on my phone later, I realize the company sells bathroom supplies. I guess that was pretty clever?
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I bet they left it after refilling stuff, so the business knows they were in.
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10-04-2019, 11:31 PM
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angry white woman
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Join Date: Feb 2005
Gender: Female
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
Quote:
Originally Posted by lisarea
Right after the election, I put an anti-Trump sign up facing the street, and decided to leave it up until it's irrelevant, so it's been there ever since. We've had several people compliment it and we even got a very thoughtful anonymous thank you card. But also, someone egged and TPed our house in the middle of the night last fourth of July.
So this year, I was kind of wondering if they'd do it again, but I wasn't too worried about it. It was a minor pain in the ass, but it was also pretty funny that someone was so angry that they went to the trouble and risk of doing that. I figured it was just some dumb kids or something.
Anyhows, we usually have a bunch of people come over on the 4th because our city has a big community event right by our house so you can watch fireworks right from the house, and we even let a couple of our friends park in our driveway. So we had people over and ate a bunch of food and watched fireworks, and there were a couple people still here playing video games when I went to bed.
A little bit atter I'd gone to bed, one of the people playing video games, a maybe 90 pound woman named Tiffany, heard a noise outside and tore straight out to find a grown assed man just starting to TP our tree, and scared him so he ran down the street, dropping his vandalism supplies.
And wait for it. It was toilet paper with Trump's face on it, which I'm assuming he thought was an endorsement of Trump. Like maybe he didn't pick up on the subtle implications of that or something.
I mean, I'm not wanting Tiffany to be running around chasing Magas around in the middle of the night anymore, but it is funny as hell that it happened.
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I read this an hour or so ago and have been debating whether to share this. But what the fuck. In my town and specifically a few close to each other neighborhoods, juveys (I assume) have taken to vandalizing several stop signs by writing things like “eating meat” or “voting for Trump under the word stop—“ or Don’t on top and believing on the bottom.
Well I found myself on a very seldom traveled side street maybe two months ago . And, alas, the stop sign had been graffitied with the word ICE under it. At this point let me say I have no idea what took ahold of me. Perhaps an always just under the surface 14 year old child inside. But this road seemed to be deserted and I happened to have a big black sharpie. I jump out of my car and on a space below the sign but not on the sign itself that just happened to have enough room for writing I hurriedly scribbled Stop Lice! underneath. Then ran back to my car with the same adrenaline from my adolescence whenever I’d done something mischievous.
I started making my getaway when I see flashers in my rear view. HOLY FUCK what have I done. I pull over and who pulls up beside me is an old friend of mine who works for the power company. He is looking at me incredulously like..“What the fuck, Michelle”. We vowed to keep the incident between us the same way you might vow to keep a secret if you you accidentally caught your friend committing adultery. We’ve not spoken of it since.
Reading your story I was laughing about the grown adult doing something so childish and suddenly remembered he ain’t got nothing on me.
I am a 53 year old middle class woman with a good family and professional reputation but couldn’t resist this childish move. I know this doesn’t make me look great but now that it’s far enough after the fact I’ve grown beyond embarrassed to snickering about it from time to time.
__________________
What are sleeping dreams but so much garbage?~ Glen’s homophobic newsletter
Last edited by Miss Shelby; 10-04-2019 at 11:46 PM.
Reason: fixing grammar which I probably made worse
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10-05-2019, 01:03 AM
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Shitpost Sommelier
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
The best thing about knowing prime numbers is knowing how many perogies to boil to piss everyone off.
__________________
Peering from the top of Mount Stupid
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10-12-2019, 01:04 AM
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Solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
In the past couple of days, I have witnessed two separate instances of people being mocked for spelling a word correctly. Too bad it didn't happen on the internet, where the correcting mockers and mocking correctors would have had access to online resources or even spellchecks.
OH BUT WAIT IT DID.
(Bestiality and hanged.)
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10-12-2019, 10:53 AM
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puzzler
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Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: UK
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
We call that, "Doing a Quayle"
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dan Quale Wikipedia article
On June 15, 1992, Quayle altered 12-year-old student William Figueroa's correct spelling of "potato" to "potatoe" at the Muńoz Rivera Elementary School spelling bee in Trenton, New Jersey.
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__________________
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10-17-2019, 06:38 PM
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Forum Killer
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
I got one of those publisher's clearing house calls. His line was so terrible I could barely even hear him trying to scam me and I kept having to ask him to repeat. Eventually he told me, "Fuck you. You hear that? Fuck you." and hung up.
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09-16-2020, 09:19 PM
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Quality Contributor
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Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Luxembourg
Gender: Male
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
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10-10-2020, 10:36 PM
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Solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short
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Re: Trivial things that amuse you
Here is a phone listing website for my exchange. Such a melting pot! I think my favorite is Girl Nibbe, but Princecharles Nicassio is pretty great too.
You can look up yours by changing the URL to your area code and exchange, formatted like in that example. Or like if you get any babies, you could find good names for them there. (They charge for looking up individual numbers for people who cannot operate the search feature on their browser, I guess.)
Normally, scam sites make me mad, but I like this one and I hope a lot of private investigators and data miners purchase subscriptions.
PS: Don't call all the numbers in my exchange looking for me.
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