Conservatives say stupid shit

[The Man]

Oh look, Ted Nugent is still a goddamned moron.

Dee Snider is still pretty cool: ‘Twisted Sister’ reminds Republicans of the time Ted Nugent pooped his pants to dodge Vietnam | The Raw Story

[SR71]

This is not a conservative (well not really conservative even, more like rabid ass clown) saying stupid shit, but rather someone pointing out the stupid shit. Stumbled across at another forum.

[Watser?]

Rand Paul has a lot of stupid to live up to, being named after Ayn Rand and RonPaul.

[Kael]

If I was named Rand I'd just tell everyone that my parents really liked The Wheel of Time.

[Adam]

If my name was rand, I would tell people my middle name was (void).

[Dingfod]

[lisarea]

THOU SHALT NOT FURIATE MERRICA BARE ARMS!

[ImGod]

Originally Posted by Dingfod

Big Image

Unfortunately, based on my wife's friends* at facebook, this is one of the nicest things I've seen written about Obama this week.

*Friends being mostly her former high school classmates and old farts from a BFE Nebraska inbred half white community of 1,200 people. [Her dumbass Uncle]If'n it wern't for the spics working at the local plant the town woulda folded and the skool woulda closed. Why, oh why, won't Obama deport them so US citizens wouldn't leave.[/Dumbass Uncle]

[LadyShea]

House Republican Leader Blames Gun Violence On 'Welfare Moms' | ThinkProgress

My question is regarding the guns and is Washington at all aware of the psychotropic drugs that these children are taking? I guarantee it 100 percent that’s our big problem. [...]

LANKFORD: I agree with that. I think there’s a bunch of issues that, quite frankly, most liberals are afraid to talk about. [...] Where are we on all those psychiatric drugs? We’ve overmedicated kids. Quite frankly some of the overmedication of kids are because welfare moms want to get additional benefits and if they can put them on SSI through maintenance drugs, they can also put them on Social Security disability and get a separate check. That is wrong on every single level. Not only is it fraudulent to the government, but it also tells a kid with great potential, “don’t try because you’re disabled.”

[Ari]

There seems to be this interesting unspoken conservative-male myth that Women hate children.
I don't get it.

[erimir]

Women who don't work and have kids but no husband hate children.

Married women who don't work and have kids love children and know the joy of their Biblical role.

[Sauron]

Originally Posted by Ari

There seems to be this interesting unspoken conservative-male myth that Women hate children.
I don't get it.

It comes from being pagan lesbians.

[Qingdai]

They act like children, and women hate that, ergo women hate children.


When in reality, women hate whiny men with too much power over things they don't understand or care about.

[BrotherMan]

Here's a good one for you. If this doesn't win the thrad then you all are doing it wrong. It's very damn stupid.

Your Womb is a Graveyard

Swanson: I’m beginning to get some evidence from certain doctors and certain scientists that have done research on women’s wombs after they’ve gone through the surgery, and they’ve compared the wombs of women who were on the birth control pill to those who were not on the birth control pill. And they have found that with women who are on the birth control pill, there are these little tiny fetuses, these little babies, that are embedded into the womb. They’re just like dead babies. They’re on the inside of the womb. And these wombs of women who have been on the birth control pill effectively have become graveyards for lots and lots of little babies.

[Ymir's blood]

Particularly strong feminists can perform a blasphemous ritual under the dark of the new moon, tapping into the souls of these babies and so gain great power in both the spirit world and the world of men.

[LadyShea]

I thought this was an interesting theory: Far righters believe they are talking amongst themselves and don't seem to get that the whole world can see them.

This phenomena seems to exist with a number of people on Facebook and Twitter too, who seem to forget, or not understand in the first place, that they are broadcasting their stupid to the whole world.

Urban Legends Vs. The Pill: How the Christian Right Uses Propaganda Against Reproductive Rights | RH Reality Check

the internet means that it’s easier than ever for outsiders to have access to media materials that are intended for Christian right insiders only, which is the bread and butter for websites such as Right Wing Watch.

The result is becoming a problem for the Christian right. Their insular culture encourages ever more bizarre flights of fancy, competitive demonstrations of misogyny, and making up of their own facts—and then all that is transmitted in a way where outsiders can tune in and expose the inner workings of the Christian right to the outside world. Kevin Swanson of Generations Radio is simply the latest person to fall into the trap of speaking to insiders where outsiders can hear. And outsiders are astounded at what Christian right culture looks like on the inside.

[LadyShea]

I remember when I was a kid a story was going around my church (I only regularly went to church for about 2.5 years so it was in the early 80's). I knew it for an urban legend upon hearing it, but most were convinced

Anyway it went like this: A woman was some kind of pagan (maybe even a high Priestess!), and had gotten a lot of tattoos of Satanic symbols and such, you know how those witches are. Anyway she got saved and elected to be baptized by full body immersion in a lake (or river, it differed) because she was so very radically saved you see and a head sprinkle wasn't nearly enough. When she emerged from the water all of her tattoos had disappeared!

That has stuck with me all these years because it was such a stupid thing to have happened: God is working tattoo removal miracles but not melanoma removal miracles? Also, because it had all the hallmarks of an Urban Legend but these people wanted to validate their beliefs so badly they passed it on.

I also remember hearing about similar Mormon legends of how the magic underpants saved people from being burned and stuff.

[The Lone Ranger]

We were told of all sorts of similar things when I was a kid and still attended church. Some of the tales of miraculous things that happened to people when they abandoned their "Godless ways"* and came to accept the "True Faith" were so ridiculous that it's hard to believe any adults in the audience managed to keep a straight face. But if anyone ever doubted any of the ludicrous claims the preacher was making, no one ever said so.


Here's one I've always remembered. Even when I was a kid, I thought it painted a particularly horrifying picture of their "loving God."

According to this preacher, he used to watch a lot of television. But "everybody knows" that television is a "tool of Satan" -- well, except for the religious shows, anyway.

So, when his first child was born, the child quickly grew sick. The preacher told us that he didn't make the connection, and so he kept on watching television, even though he knew it to be a tool of Satan. So, his son died -- because the father watched too much television.

A few years later, he had a daughter. Not having learned his lesson, he continued to watch television. And soon, his daughter became deathly ill. Finally getting the message, he swore off all television, except for religious broadcasts. And just like that, his daughter recovered.

He then trotted his daughter out onto stage to "prove to us" how "kind and merciful" God is. Because he didn't kill this kid for her father's "sin" of watching television.

Even as a kid, I thought that he was portraying his God as a complete monster, and I couldn't understand why everyone in the audience was applauding and claiming this was somehow "proof" of God's mercy and kindness and love.


*Anyone who didn't believe exactly as we were taught to was condemned as "Godless" -- if not overtly in league with Satan. Heck, we were taught that Catholics were "Godless idolators."

[BrotherMan]

Far righters believe they are talking amongst themselves and don't seem to get that the whole world can see them.

I don't know. I get the impression that they are convinced beyond any doubt that what they believe is right and true. What galls them is that people have the temerity to question what is right and true so loudly and vigorously.

[Ensign Steve]

Originally Posted by BrotherMan

I don't know. I get the impression that they are convinced beyond any doubt that what they believe is right and true. What galls them is that people have the temerity to question what is right and true so loudly and vigorously.

Ha! This just came up on my facebook feed: Rove, Tea Party in GOP civil war — MSNBC

Here is the part that specifically made me "Ha!":

The aim, in a nutshell, is to push back against the Tea Party and bring the GOP’s nominating process back under the control of the party’s Washington power-brokers. In recent cycles, Tea Party-backed Senate candidates have won the Republican nomination over more moderate GOPers, only to be defeated in the general election. In several cases—think of Todd Akin’s “legitimate rape” remarks—they’ve been done in thanks in part to campaign trail slip-ups that more seasoned candidates might have avoided.

Believe it or don't believe it, but for God's sake, don't say it out loud!

[Nullifidian]

Originally Posted by LadyShea

Anyway it went like this: A woman was some kind of pagan (maybe even a high Priestess!), and had gotten a lot of tattoos of Satanic symbols and such, you know how those witches are. Anyway she got saved and elected to be baptized by full body immersion in a lake (or river, it differed) because she was so very radically saved you see and a head sprinkle wasn't nearly enough. When she emerged from the water all of her tattoos had disappeared!

Maybe she had the foresight to get temporary tattoos just in case she were to suddenly undergo a religious conversion.

[BrotherMan]

Originally Posted by Stormlight

Here's a fun little game. I give you a quote and you guys have to guess the following about the person that said it:

This Super Bowl sucks more dick than adult Trayvon Martin would have for drug money.

I appreciate you! I agree that Trayvon Martin was a dangerous thug who needed to be put down like a rabid dog.

So here's what I just learned. Because Trayvon Martin was black, I can't tell a joke about how he was an admitted drug user. Interesting!

show spoiler

NO, YOU'RE WRONG!

show spoiler

Former Head of South Carolina GOP, Todd Kincannon via Twitter (@ToddKincannon), can you believe it?

[Stormlight]

Originally Posted by The Lone Ranger

Heck, we were taught that Catholics were "Godless idolators."

We are.

[Escapegoat]

Idolators? Certainly. Godless? Not quite sure. Only if everyone is godless because, like.....there is no God. Or something.

[Kael]

Am I the only one that thinks "godless idolators" doesn't make much sense? If they're worshiping something, being idolators and all, aren't they kind of NOT godless by definition? Sure, you can say it's a FALSE god, but that's not the same as NO god. I don't think that's a pedantic or idiosyncratic distinction either, witness how atheists are generally less trusted by religious people than followers of other (false, obvs) religions...