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  #351  
Old 10-13-2006, 04:56 AM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

I got one of those packages the other day too... now that was REALLY a surprise.
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  #352  
Old 10-16-2006, 12:18 AM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dingfod
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dingfod
The sheriff may not have to resign, not if the Grady County Commission decides in favor of termination.
They're keeping him, waiting for the outcome of the criminal proceedings.
At least three more police officers involved in this illegal gambling case have been indicted, Sheriff’s Deputy Lt. Jim Peek, Deputy Delmer Barthelme, and former Chickasha Officer, now Grady County jailer, Greg Parks, were each charged with a felony of a peace officer engaging in illegal gambling and a misdemeanor charge of willful neglect of duty.
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  #353  
Old 10-16-2006, 12:29 AM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

More apt to saying "Shucks", instead of "Crikey", Oklahoma author, Dr. E. Norbert Smith is known by some locally as the brainy version of "crocodile hunter". Dr. Smith has spent the last three decades studying wild animals' response to fear, including alligators.

it all started with
“Alligators had just been classified as an endangered species, so I decided to study them next,” he recalled. “I made arrangements to spend time with the alligator experts Ted Joanen and Larry McNease at the Rockefeller Refuge at Grand Chenier, La., south of Lake Charles. I rode my Honda 175 motorcycle from Weatherford to the refuge and spent two weeks learning to call, handle and sex alligators. My second night there, I caught 38 from an airboat in about an hour.”

Dr. Smith is working on five books, he hopes to finish the next two soon, one to cover 500 Bible scriptures and the science behind them. He and his coauthor are fans of Christian apologist and author C.S. Lewis.

Dr. Smith also plans to write a book about his truck driving experiences, he has driven over 2 million miles. I'll be anything he writes will be interesting even if you don't agree with his interpretation.
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  #354  
Old 10-20-2006, 07:44 PM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

Word to the wise: Don't bring a plastic gun to a gunfight.

For some reason Guy Wade Buck decided to rob a Hugo, Oklahoma liquor store one night. He picked the wrong one, the wrong store, if not on the wrong night. Armed with what looked like a .45 automatic pistol, Buck ordered the clerk to open the cash drawer. The clerk complied, but when the robber was busy grabbing cash, the clerk grabbed a .38 caliber revolver and shot Buck once in the chest. When that failed to get Buck to lay down his gun, the clerk pulled out a shotgun and shot him again. Buck stumbled out of the liquor store and was later apprehended by Hugo police. He was flown to a hospital in Texarkana where he remains in critical condition. His gun turned out to be a plastic pellet firing air gun.
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  #355  
Old 10-20-2006, 07:47 PM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

"I need to go to church" was all the explanation the driver gave for leaving the scene of a traffic accident and leading the police on a 75 mph chase into Tulsa. Kari Kralek never did make it to church that evening, she was arrested on several charges. Imagine that.
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  #356  
Old 10-20-2006, 07:50 PM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

If the Tulsa police and other law enforcement officers in Oklahoma aren't busy chasing felonious fleeing church ladies today, they'll be on the roof of the area Krispy Kreme donut emporiums soliciting donations by lowering buckets by rope. I'm going ... to get a donut.
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  #357  
Old 10-22-2006, 09:46 AM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

Dingfod's nephew kicks ass and takes names, in two sports.
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  #358  
Old 10-22-2006, 09:50 AM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

Bill Crozier, Republican candidate for Oklahoma State School Superintendent, suggests school book covers should be made of Kevlar so they could be used as shields to protect students from school shooters.

Brilliant, Bill; that'll work. How about helmets and body armor?

Last edited by Dingfod; 10-22-2006 at 10:13 AM.
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  #359  
Old 10-22-2006, 09:56 AM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

Guns don't shoot people, gun shows shoot people.

Gun vendor at Wenamacher Gun Show in Tulsa this weekend thought rounds in shotgun were dummies. Turns out he was the dummy because when he pulled the trigger, the gun went off, sending pellets ricocheting off the floor, striking two people. The two were taken to area hospitals for treatment for wounds to the stomach and head. Names were not released to protect the guilty.

Dick Cheney remains silent on the matter.

Last edited by Dingfod; 10-22-2006 at 10:21 AM.
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  #360  
Old 10-22-2006, 10:02 AM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

Slama Lama Ding Dong

That's the name on the return address of the envelope containing a money order for $50.60 that arrived at the Pittsburg Oklahoma County Clerk's office. The Clerk's office couldn't figure out whose account to credit the receipt to, but that didn't stop them from trying. The payment was sent with a stamped return envelope for receipt, but the above name, Route 4, Stigler, Oklahoma was utilized leaving no clue to the identity of the payee. As of now, it's still a mystery.

Tom Turner unavailable for comment.

Last edited by Dingfod; 10-22-2006 at 10:14 AM.
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  #361  
Old 10-22-2006, 10:20 AM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

There are still temperance unions?

Apparently so, one such group met Saturday in Enid, Oklahoma.

Carry Nation unavailable for comment.
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  #362  
Old 10-22-2006, 10:33 AM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

Perhaps lying down for a nap on the railroad tracks isn't a good idea. 45 year old man was killed when a Burlington Santa Fe train couldn't stop in time.

Woody Guthrie unavailable for comment.
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  #363  
Old 10-24-2006, 03:28 AM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

Tie-down straps are not climbing ropes.

Oklahoma City man was trying to take photographs off a bluff near Grand Lake of the Cherokees by lowering himself off the 100 foot bluff with tie-down straps and a harness. Straps came loose. Man discovered he couldn't fly. Man died.

Charles Darwin unavailable for comment.
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  #364  
Old 10-24-2006, 03:32 AM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

Shotguns can't shoot 15 miles.

Western Oklahoma schools Sweetwater and Reydon shut down after a Sweetwater School janitor saw a man near the school carrying a gun. The school owns 50 acres surrounding the school. When questioned, the man stated he was hunting because he was hungry. That they locked down the Sweetwater School was most likely appropriate, but Reydon is 15 miles away.

Charleton Heston too busy shooting things to comment.
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  #365  
Old 10-26-2006, 05:40 PM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

Brand spanking new 1957 Plymouth Belvedere to be unveiled next June 15th.

When Tulsa unearths a time capsule buried in 1957, they hope to find a well-preserved 1957 Plymouth, along with the following:
* 10 gallons of gasoline and 5 quarts of oil (who, in 1957 knew we'd still be using oil and gasoline by 2007?)
* A Douglas Aircraft Co. aerial map of airport facilities and legend (a little outdated)
* Statement from Tulsa council of Churches – and prayer for greatest good next 50 years a recently completed history of churches in Tulsa and a directory of the present churches (not outdated at all, with the exception of the Oral Roberts Tomorrowland Park)
* Statement from board of education – historical data related to 50 years of education in Tulsa and copies of "School Life" all-high school publication issued by Tulsa high schools each month (Dead and gone like Buddy Holly)
* Statements from Mayor and Chamber of Commerce officials (Who, in 1957, would've thought we'd still have politicians by now?)
* Flags which have been flown over the national capitol, state capitol and in the county and city
* Other aerial photos of the area
* Statement from Tulsa Trades and Labor Council
* Statements from all former mayors of the city – their record of service and civic accomplishments in the city, state and nationally

Stephen King's Christine unavailable for comment.
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  #366  
Old 10-26-2006, 05:51 PM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

I'm more religious than you are because I'm Baptist, you Presbyterian.

Brian Bingaman, candidate for State Senate, is complaining the phone messages on behalf of his Democratic opponent, John Mark Young, are saying that Young is more conservative because he is Baptist, whereas Beingaman is Presbyterian. Elsewhere, other than in Oklahoma, Presbyterians may be known to be more liberal than your typical Baptist church, but that certainly isn't the case here.

John Knox and Roger Williams both unavailable for comment.
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  #367  
Old 10-26-2006, 05:58 PM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

The Chickasha McDonald's gets a new drive-through.

Man, feeling ill while driving down I-44, starts to pull over, passes out and wakes up inside his Jeep inside the McDonalds restaurant. Thankfully, no one was seriously hurt, not even his passenger, who bailed out when he saw the driver had passed out. Fortunately, McDonald's is made out of paper mache, glass and aluminum because damage was only estimated to be $5000. Later a wrecker wriggled and wrangled the wrecked Wrangler out of the wrongly wrecked wretched wrestaurant.

Wronald McDonald unavailable for comment.
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  #368  
Old 10-26-2006, 06:04 PM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

Proposed permanent absentee balloting sounds profound but practical.

A McAlester man is proposing more or less a permanent absentee ballot system for those that want it. As it stands now, one must apply every election year for absentee ballots for each election. What is proposed is similar to Oregon's election law, ballots would be mailed out a few weeks before election day. They could either be sent back by mail or dropped at designated ballot collection sites. Sounds good to me.

Diebold choking so bad they cannot respond.
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  #369  
Old 10-26-2006, 06:08 PM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

Oklahoma Attorney General race is chicken shit.

Republican candidate for Attorney General, James Dunn, as well as chicken farmers, chicken producers, and the Arkansas Goobernator's office all say Oklahoma AG Drew Edmundson is making the Arkansas chicken poop in the state's rivers a political issue. No, you are.

Foghorn Leghorn unavailable for comment because Mel Blanc is dead.


But, if he could, he'd say "It's a joke son, a joke."
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  #370  
Old 10-30-2006, 09:35 PM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dingfod
Tattoo parlors are finally legal in Oklahoma, but they're already bitching about having to follow the rules established by the new law legalizing their business, rules such as having to pay $250 per artist license fee, having to purchase a $100,000 surety bond, and having to be at least 1000 feet from schools, playgrounds, and churches.
Actually, tattoo parlors don't become legal until Wednesday. Perhaps the reason the tatoo parlor in the 2100 block of east 11th street was so busy last night is all the people that want to get the last of the illegal tattoos.

Herve Villechaize too short to reach the microphone to make a comment.
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  #371  
Old 10-30-2006, 09:39 PM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

Bank sues car dealership.

Actually, the only reason I posted this article is because of the names. The bank is First Pryority Bank of Pryor, Oklahoma. One of the named defendants is Chasma Hawkes.

Erasmus B. Dragon not available for comment.
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  #372  
Old 11-09-2006, 04:43 AM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

It was foggy in Tulsa Tuesday morning:



The building on the right is where inland wave and Dingfod work.
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  #373  
Old 11-09-2006, 04:48 AM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

Cliff Claven is in Oklahoma.

Actor John Ratzenberger is in the state filming more segments for his show "Made in America". He is to tour Shawnee Milling Company and Round House Brand Workwear in Shawnee today and Wednesday, then finish up at Charles Manufacturing in Perry where they make the Ditch Witch trenching machines.

Norm Peterson too drunk to comment.
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  #374  
Old 11-09-2006, 04:56 AM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

Mary Fallin not fallen or falling.

Republican Representative-elect of the 5th Congressional District of Oklahoma, Lt. Governor Mary Fallin, first female and first Republican Lt. Governor, is now Oklahoma's first female elected to Congress in 86 years, elected by over 60% of the vote in her district.

Miss Alice unavailable for comment.
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  #375  
Old 11-09-2006, 06:31 PM
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Default Re: Only in Oklahoma...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dingfod

Gorgeous!!
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