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09-13-2018, 05:26 PM
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Solipsist
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Kolmannessa kerroksessa
Gender: Male
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Antebellum hyperlinks
I would greatly like to innerduce this heah thread for y'all to shai-ah yoah oldest and finest connections to web pages, yoah antebellum hyperlinks as it may be.
And by the grace of the Loa-ad you will surely do a bettah job than I of setting down the old ways of speech.
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09-13-2018, 06:48 PM
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puzzler
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Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: UK
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Re: Antebellum hyperlinks
Scott Pakin's automatic complaint-letter generator has been up since 1994 - it's been updated a few times (e.g. it now supports secure https connections) but it still retains the look, feel, and same basic functionality that it had almost a quarter of a century ago.
__________________
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09-13-2018, 07:07 PM
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Shitpost Sommelier
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Re: Antebellum hyperlinks
For faking it there's the Geocities-izer.
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Peering from the top of Mount Stupid
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09-13-2018, 09:04 PM
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Solipsist
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Kolmannessa kerroksessa
Gender: Male
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Re: Antebellum hyperlinks
Quote:
Originally Posted by ceptimus
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+
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kamilah Hauptmann
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=
Scott Pakin's automatic complaint-letter generator
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09-13-2018, 09:06 PM
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Shitpost Sommelier
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Re: Antebellum hyperlinks
Ouch.
__________________
Peering from the top of Mount Stupid
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09-13-2018, 09:15 PM
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Solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short
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Re: Antebellum hyperlinks
You guys should really go to more modern websites, such as the HTML5 version of Zombo.com.
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09-13-2018, 11:11 PM
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Just keep m'nose clean, egg, chips & beans, I'm always full of steam
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: so far out, I'm too far in
Gender: Bender
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Re: Antebellum hyperlinks
Quote:
Originally Posted by ceptimus
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I shit you not, if you put Pres. Donald Trump in this thing, everything it says is true.
__________________
"Her eyes in certain light were violet, and all her teeth were even. That's a rare, fair feature: even teeth. She smiled to excess, but she chewed with real distinction." - Eleanor of Aquitaine
...........
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09-14-2018, 01:43 AM
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mesospheric bore
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Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: New Zealand
Gender: Male
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Re: Antebellum hyperlinks
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sock Puppet
I shit you not, if you put Pres. Donald Trump in this thing, everything it says is true.
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Jebus that's uncanny...
Quote:
In this letter I'm going to discuss propagandism. I'm going to delve into great detail about Pres. Donald Trump's execrable, fatuous philosophies. I'm going to talk at length about how Pres. Trump has been replacing law and order with anarchy and despotism. In short, this is not a letter for children or the overly sensitive. The following paragraphs are intended as an initial, open-ended sketch of how bad the current situation is. His casus belli are geared toward the continuation of social stratification under the rubric of “tradition”. Funny, that was the same term that Pres. Trump's shock troops once used to declare martial law, suspend elections, and round up dissidents (i.e., anyone who does not buy his lie that ableism is absolutely essential to the well-being of society).
We must all face the storm and stress of working together towards a shared vision. This exercise will, at the very least, demonstrate to the world that we must stop Pres. Trump now. Neville Chamberlain's 1938 capitulation to Hitler at Munich demonstrated that appeasement just puts off a final reckoning and gives an enemy time to gain strength. That's why it is imperative that we change the minds of those who defile the present and destroy the future. If he has any children, I recommend that Pres. Trump teach them about love, trust, cooperation, community, reason, negotiation, and compromise rather than violence, paranoia, and fear.
While it's true that it is morally unjustifiable for Pres. Trump to create new (and reinforce existing) prejudices and misconceptions, the more important point is that Pres. Trump fails to comprehend and practice the teachings of his religion. More precisely, he conveniently forgets his religion's messages of peace, love, compassion, acceptance, and forgiveness—or, at best, misremembers them as an edict to “enlighten” anyone who doesn't believe that his enemies are aligned with very dark and malevolent fourth-dimensional aliens known as Draconians. To quote someone far wittier than I'll ever be, “I am aggrieved by Pres. Trump's use of aspheterism to unfurl the flag of militarism.” I sure wish I had said that because that's exactly what I feel. Nevertheless, his sallies will, as science tells us, inevitably diminish society's inducements to good behavior. In reaching that conclusion I have made the usual assumption that Pres. Trump's lack of empathy for others leads him to alter laws, language, and customs in the service of regulating social relations. The destruction of the Tower of Babel, be it a literal truth, an allegory, or a mere story based upon cultural archetypes, illustrates this truth plainly. Let me sum up. I am so mad at Pres. Donald Trump right now, I could spit nails.
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09-14-2018, 01:47 AM
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Jin, Gi, Rei, Ko, Chi, Shin, Tei
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Re: Antebellum hyperlinks
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sock Puppet
Quote:
Originally Posted by ceptimus
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I shit you not, if you put Pres. Donald Trump in this thing, everything it says is true.
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Good grief! I typed "Donald J. Trump" in, and the complaint it generated was downright scary, it was so apropos
__________________
“The greatest way to live with honor in this world is to be what we pretend to be.” -- Socrates
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09-14-2018, 01:47 AM
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mesospheric bore
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Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: New Zealand
Gender: Male
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Re: Antebellum hyperlinks
Actually it's pretty accurate for others, too:
Quote:
My complaint about Very Rev. Sock Puppet
Let's talk again about an all-too-familiar subject: Very Rev. Sock Puppet and his unforgiving propositions. I'm going to give it to you straight: Salacious, subversive bourgeoisie often take earthworms or similar small animals and impale them on a pin to enjoy watching them twist and writhe as they slowly die. Similarly, Very Rev. Puppet enjoys watching respectable people twist and writhe whenever he threatens to do away with intellectual honesty. There is more at play here than his purely political game of making serious dialogue difficult or impossible. There are ideologies at work, hidden agendas to utilize questionable and illegal fund-raising techniques.
We must always be mindful of the special needs of the least privileged members of our anti-Sock Puppet movement. We need even their help to transform our culture of war and violence into a culture of peace and nonviolence. At the risk of repeating myself, I must reiterate that he wonders why everyone hates him. Apparently, he never stopped to think that maybe it's because he is widely seen as unforgivable for branding me as putrid. Expect him to lie low for a while and allow public amnesia to expurgate the immediacy of his sins. Afterwards, he'll indubitably return to fostering debauchery. My hope, though, is that the second time around, people will be aware of the fact that I admit that I'm not perfect. I admit that I may have been a bit lily-livered when I stated that Very Rev. Puppet's chuffy, hypersensitive op-ed pieces are based on a jungle mentality of mistrust, betrayal, and disloyalty. Still, that doesn't justify the name-calling, rudeness, and simple ugliness that Very Rev. Puppet invariably finds so necessary. Nor does it justify his causing an increase in disease, scapegoatism, crime, and vice. To close, let me accentuate that if we introduce an important but underrepresented angle on Very Rev. Sock Puppet's abrasive squibs we shall not only survive his attacks; we shall prevail.
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09-14-2018, 04:48 AM
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A Very Gentle Bort
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Bortlandia
Gender: Male
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Re: Antebellum hyperlinks
I remember just one phrase from a previously generated complaint from that very site. It went something like "Name thinks ethnic cleanser can be found in the laundry aisle."
__________________
\V/_ I COVLD TEACh YOV BVT I MVST LEVY A FEE
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09-14-2018, 05:45 PM
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Just keep m'nose clean, egg, chips & beans, I'm always full of steam
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: so far out, I'm too far in
Gender: Bender
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Re: Antebellum hyperlinks
Quote:
Originally Posted by fragment
Actually it's pretty accurate for others, too:
Quote:
My complaint about Very Rev. Sock Puppet
Expect him to lie low for a while and allow public amnesia to expurgate the immediacy of his sins. Afterwards, he'll indubitably return to fostering debauchery.
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__________________
"Her eyes in certain light were violet, and all her teeth were even. That's a rare, fair feature: even teeth. She smiled to excess, but she chewed with real distinction." - Eleanor of Aquitaine
...........
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