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Old 11-17-2011, 05:39 PM
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Alert A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

I was thinking that, for a forum which is supposedly run almost entirely by mob rule for privileged posters to have the lulz, we are lacking in a pragmatic initiation system for calling out new posters even before they are given the chance to gain face.

Take SR71, for example, who is new to the forum and has already been securing his place in the mob in only a short few months time, not once yet being called out by any of the aforementioned privileged class.

The current system not only allows new members to post virtually whatever they want at their own free will, but also the opportunity to make a first impression through a self-introduction and a short entrance exam. I, for one, think it is way too easy to gain membership on the :ff: and don't think alien posters are being challenged enough upon arrival to prove how much of a Freethinker they really are. So I would like to propose the following as a redrafting of old test to create the new MANDATORY entrance exam, so as to deface any new posters before they've even have the chance to post.

:ff: Entrance Exam
Please STFU for five minutes and carefully answer each of the following question while your e-mail verification is pending before the royal court of Freethought Forum.

1. :ff: existed even before I found it. True or False
2. If nobody links here, what the hell do you think you are doing here and why the hell should the mob allow you to post on Freethought Forum?
3. Are you a member of any other religious cults? Which?
A. Lessans
B. Mormon
C. Jehovah's Witness
D. 52% of Polish believers claim "they attend to mass, religious meetings etc. at least once a week"
3. How do you feel about gargling cum/ or 'thankhol'ing to gain privilege into the mob?
4. :ff: Gained independence from whom?
5. What year was :ff: founded on?
6. How many smilies are there in our hoard?
A. Over 3500
B. Over 4000
C. Over 9000
D. 1939
7. Which user made the one millionth post?
8. Where does weekend moderator Leesifer spend her sex holidays?
A. France
B. Spain
C. The Land of No Butterflies
D. Poland
7. Who is Captain Luxembourg?
A. :tinyrunner:
B. :tinyrunner:
C. :tinyrunner:
D. Trick question: any one of them might be Stormlight.
8. The chances of you randomly answering this self-referential mind fuck correctly is:
A. 25%
B. 4.20%
C. 11.11%
D. 3.2% of the US population is Polish
9. The three branches of our government are:
A. Queen Drusus, some vm guy, and :jiveturkey:
B. The Weekend Moderation Team, the Secret Forum, and a pet :boar:
C. ChuckF, censorship by mob rule, and :lolhog:
D. The Polish Parliament
10. What's the significance of Your Mom?
11. If you are polling what must you never forget?
12. The appropriate response to this test is:
A.
B. FUCK YOU ALL
C. :glarepoland:
D. :lolpoland:

You have finished taking the MANDATORY :ff: Entrance Exam. Please be patient in waiting for an administrator to score your test and invoke your initiation call-out thread before the court of mob rule shortly. We'd thank you, but you just aren't ready yet.


Then we can have one of the admins (there are two, right?) post an introductory initiation call-out thread that grades the newb's performance and has a corresponding reaction from the mob mentality. That way we will more perfectly have government by privileged posters, for privileged posters.

Your Score
0....... correct answers - Banninated
1-4.... correct answers - Ritual censorship by mob rule/ GTFO ceremony
5-6.... correct answers - You are still a newb. We will keep you, for the lulz.
7-9.... correct answers - You just gained face, but you need to gargle more cum.
10+ ... correct answers - Welcome to the mob, you are now granted access to the Secret Forums.


What do you guys think?

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  #2  
Old 11-17-2011, 05:55 PM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

:yeahthat:
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  #3  
Old 11-17-2011, 06:01 PM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

Good thing I snuck in here before this exam was up :shiftier:
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  #4  
Old 11-17-2011, 06:04 PM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

Quote:
Take SR71, for example, who is new to the forum and has already been securing his place in the mob in only a short few months time, not once yet being called out by any of the aforementioned privileged class.
Some newbies are like that. Demimonde and Vivisectus were other examples.

If you're one of us you're one of us. Gooble Gobble
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  #5  
Old 11-17-2011, 06:25 PM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

Pragmatism? Are you serious? How long have you been here? You should know better than to try and be "pragmatic" with us, Gonzo. I'm afraid I have to open a new thrad in the Secret Secret Forum to discuss whether or not you really belong here.

:sadno:
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  #6  
Old 11-17-2011, 06:31 PM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

It was my understanding that there would be no math. :pres:
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  #7  
Old 11-17-2011, 08:44 PM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

I WANT MORE MATH!
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  #8  
Old 11-18-2011, 05:06 AM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

I don't see the poll.
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  #9  
Old 11-18-2011, 02:14 PM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

I thought requesting a call-out for ridicule by the privileged mob was your own responsibility? I requested mine, so I resent the implication that I did not go through any initiation by means of sycophantically sitting through degrading humiliation.
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  #10  
Old 11-18-2011, 02:32 PM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

Quote:
Originally Posted by BrotherMan View Post
Pragmatism? Are you serious? How long have you been here? You should know better than to try and be "pragmatic" with us, Gonzo. I'm afraid I have to open a new thrad in the Secret Secret Forum to discuss whether or not you really belong here.

:sadno:
:freakout:

The mob within the mob... :shiftier:

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  #11  
Old 11-21-2011, 07:25 PM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

Have you gaiz noticed a certain somebody has been studiously ignoring this thread?
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  #12  
Old 11-21-2011, 09:10 PM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

Oh, don't mind Stormy. He's so small sometimes his posts are too tiny to read.
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  #13  
Old 11-22-2011, 09:46 AM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

Oh, you guys. Seriously, you guys.

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  #14  
Old 11-22-2011, 04:19 PM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

I find if I keep hitting ⌘+ I can eventually read his posts . . . but then I am usually disappointed.

--J.D.
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  #15  
Old 11-23-2011, 02:45 PM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

That's what my mom said!

oh, wait...
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  #16  
Old 12-02-2011, 06:03 AM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

Quote:
Welcome to our newest member, Adum
I already hate this guy! Get him!
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Old 12-02-2011, 06:22 AM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

I was just thinking that the forum was going through a tragic dearth of Adams. Sometimes you still hear from that Proto- guy, but the rest of 'em are so damn lazy these days...

Which, now that I think about it, is a real point against Proto- being the One True Adem.
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Old 12-02-2011, 06:34 AM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

Oh, don't worry. I'm sure you've evoked him already, just by challenging his virtual manliness. :rolleyes:
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Old 12-02-2011, 07:08 AM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

What about belphegor? Is belphegor cool yet? belphegor should start poasting.
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Old 12-02-2011, 07:17 AM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

It's hard to tell. Will belphegor take the :ff: entrance exam? :O
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  #21  
Old 12-02-2011, 07:34 AM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

All the cool kids are doing it. :yup:
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  #22  
Old 12-08-2011, 05:59 AM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kael View Post
I was just thinking that the forum was going through a tragic dearth of Adams. Sometimes you still hear from that Proto- guy, but the rest of 'em are so damn lazy these days...

Which, now that I think about it, is a real point against Proto- being the One True Adem.
I AM PRETTY SURE YOU ARE SLIGHTING ME SOMEHOW.

Barry's tried explaining it to me three times and now he's DIAGRAMMING.
......
So he's saying that these lazy lesser Gordens lack the staying power of their progenitor? WELL DUH. It is like saying man, that paring knife sure isn't good for harvesting crops. I GUESS THAT SCYTHE OVER THERE IS PRETTY WEAK-SAUCE.

Gotta go, Barry and I are watching It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia on the Digital Versatile Disc Player.
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  #23  
Old 12-10-2011, 06:50 PM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kael View Post
I was just thinking that the forum was going through a tragic dearth of Adams. Sometimes you still hear from that Proto- guy, but the rest of 'em are so damn lazy these days...

Which, now that I think about it, is a real point against Proto- being the One True Adem.
My point exactly, Kael.
I'll get that $50 to you within the week

It takes a lot of work to come in to the :ff:, all guns a blazing and looking like hot shit, only to then disappear for several months at a time because...you know...I have more important things to "do".

Speaking of which, one of my hot busty lvl. 18 elves is calling.

See you all in a few months.
Until then, have fun with Proto-boy.

Oh, and Barry, feel free to come on over to the lair whenever for some recreation time with the elves...as soon as you heal-up from the last time, of course.
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  #24  
Old 12-10-2011, 07:18 PM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

It is the holidays, wei! We've got bits of Adam all over the forum!

:surprise:
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  #25  
Old 12-12-2011, 04:40 PM
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Default Re: A Pragmatic System for Calling-out our newest members

Still only lvl. 18? :sadcheer: Level up, elves!
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