I have just today finished my first time ever being an member of a jury. Independent of the process and any specifics of the case to which I was assigned, I had a few ups and downs and backs and forths throughout the whole thing. At a minimum, I'm glad to have experienced the process. My chief understanding at this point is that despite how broken it feels from my narrow perspective it is likely very efficient as part of the whole of the system. (It's a lot of go here and wait until you are called and then go to this other place and wait to be called further and then you wait some more when you're not being utilized in the courtroom.)
Ups and downs and backs and forths. When the indictments against the defendant(s) were read I felt ... intimidated? I don't know if there is such a thing as a typical number of indictments, or even a typical case. There were at least 20 in this one. I remember thinking how could someone, and even why would someone, try to fight all of that. And intermixed were thoughts of if they have all that against this person or persons some of it must be true, right? And even before the judge welcomed us as the chosen members of the jury, I caught myself: the defendant(s) have no responsibility to answer the questions I was raising in my head. (I felt p smug once the judge said that the mere existence of an indictment is no indication of guilt.)
And now having seen the inside of the beast, I hope I never find myself putting my future in the hands of twelve to fourteen of my so-called peers. You can read it all over the internets, and it is no less apparent when sitting in the larger pool, the medium pool and all the way down into the jury room - nobody seems to be happy about being there. Unhappy about being summoned at all, let alone separated from their normal lives and schedules, family and friends and etc.
A bright spot though was that even though nobody wanting to be there, when we were given instructions and asked to deliberate, everyone on the jury took their duty with all the seriousness it deserved. Not the heavy charges nor down to the misdemeanor charges were considered in a cavalier manner.
Part of my ups/downs & backs/forths was wondering if I could hold my opinion on any single count against 11 other opposing opinions. So much so that I didn't sleep well last night. So I was happy and relieved and even a little proud when everyone agreed on stuff, for the most part. And when we disagreed? We talked about it. Like adults. It was p amazing. If voices raised at all it was with some level of incredulity about evidence/testimony and not in anger.
Additionally, to add to some
ness which neither I nor any of the other members of the jury had any control: We were the first jury to hear a case (at least partly) in the newly renovated old courthouse. Courtroom no. 1 was p nice. They recently added a pretty comprehensive technology suite. They're still working the bugs out trying to get it all to work efficiently. The physical set up was weird from the perspective of someone who only knows television courtrooms. The prosecution and defense desks both faced the jury box. It was weird not being able to look straight ahead at nothing and instead maybe accidentally staring down either the defendant(s) or a police officer sitting with the prosecutor.
Another thing that surprised me. I thought bailiffs were like, I dunno, court cops - charged with keeping peace in the courtroom. What I didn't know is that they are basically the court butlers. The bailiff assigned to us would arrive before everyone to ensure the courtroom was clean and ready, in addition to attending to our needs and comfort, and staying long after people were done for the day to ensure the courtroom was in good order. In addition to being required to be on their feet all day.
Finally, in addition to the boredom of being asked to wait all the time everywhere we go, I found it an interesting experience. I did like the process. I guess I'm a process nerd now. I like knowing how different organizations get their things done. I would like to find out what's going on when I'm stuck in the jury room waiting for somebody to come or go or whatever - how a ten minute recess somehow turns into waiting for an hour, you know?
And also finally in additional addition: As I've gotten older I have found myself reading less and less technical/informational/educational material. And I would never have thought listening to people talk about legalize and then reading to understand legalize in a specific context could scratch an itch in my brain - because I didn't think it actually existed. But it does. Or, specifically, it did in the case. If it were in any way proper, I would have most likely ended up
right there in the jury box. The other jurors were annoyed-bored with all of the repetition and language usage, but there I was being all
in a good way.
And as I recently secretly told lisapea, now that I've seen a courtroom I feel like I'm at least the equal of our resident Matlock.