[Ymir's blood]

Through my my junior year of high school, I gave no thought to how I looked. Being as I was almost completely introverted and asocial, clothes were really of no importance to me. Sneakers, indigo jeans and button down shirts, total uber-nerd except for the lack of pencils and pocket protector. (I wasn't very studious, just lost in a world of daydreams.)

Then the first real friend I had turned me on to 'power' metal bands and I started taking an intererest in my image. I started wearing printed t-shirts, ripped jeans and a denim jacket with a 'Live After Death' back patch and obnoxious buttons all over the front. I also wore a long black raincoat a lot.

Started letting my hair grow out as well and ended up quitting my first job when they wanted me to cut it. By my first (and only) year in college, it was down below my shoulder blades. I started wearing boots then as well, mostly hiking boots but occasionally black engineer boots.

As the Eighties passed and I got older, that started to get toned down. My hair got cut, the jeans were no longer ripped and patches and buttons disappeared from the jacket. In the early to mid-Nineties, I wanted to look more professional at work and abandoned the printed tees, opting for polo or button down shirts.

I started drawing a line between the real me and who I was at work, essentially trying to lead a double life. After a while, the real me started to disappear and without going in to details, I ended up having a near total emotional breakdown. Picking up the pieces of my psyche, I emerged pretty much back where I started, jeans and button down shirts, though this time in an effort to simply be invisible.

Over time and especially after getting online and seeing people who didn't dress to conform, my desire for self expression slowly eclipsed my fears. I started adding more and more black to my wardrobe, eventually abandoning the blue jeans and khaki shirts and going for a darker overall look. Over time that has become less conventional. I'm still working on my 'new look'. It changes constantly as I find something new to add to it.

My hair is dyed and I wear some makeup. At the moment, my nails are painted. I suspect my coworkers think I'm either crazy or gay, but *whatever*. Most of them have pretty much avoided me for years anyway.