What's the frequency, Colorado?

[Stephen Maturin]

Originally Posted by Stephen Maturin

Speaking of wingnut performance art, here is the campaign kickoff vid of Ron Hanks, a lunatic running to unseat incumbent Sen. Michael Bennet, a moderate Dem.

Guess who's the leading candidate for the GOP nomination thus far. The poor schulbs in the lolorado GOP who wistfully jerk off to memories of the pre-Trump Republican Party and insist that dangerous nuts like Hanks aren't "real" Republicans are looking more self-deluded every goddamn day:

Two-thirds of Colorado House GOP members voted Tuesday in favor of formally thanking state Rep. Ron Hanks and those who joined him at the U.S. Capitol on Jan. 6 at the U.S. Capitol.

A majority of House Republicans also voted to “call into question” whether Joe Biden was legitimately elected; to urge the decertification of 2020 election results in an effort to reinstall former President Donald Trump; to support embattled Mesa County Clerk and Recorder Tina Peters, an ally of election deniers who is under investigation for allegedly allowing a security breach in her elections division; and to commit to ensuring dead people are removed from voter rolls — something for which there is already a process in Colorado.

Yessir, the party of Dwight Eisenhower and Jack Kilpatrick is alive and well here in lolorado.

[Kamilah Hauptmann]

Found at Charlie's Bar in Denver. : antiwork

[Stephen Maturin]

Not every political shit show in Colorado is Republican.

Walker for Colorado: Lauren Boebert's worst...

[slimshady2357]

I mean, I'd probably still rather have the raining shit dude than Boebert... but he also seems rat-brained crazy. That was fucking insane.

[Kamilah Hauptmann]

I’ll get off my arse and make an antiwork thrad one day:


Reddit - Dive into anything

B2F24974-3B78-4810-8DAA-2368EC595E74.jpeg

Government handouts cries the recipient of almost $60k

[JoeP]

Originally Posted by Kamilah Hauptmann

I’ll get off my arse and make an antiwork thrad one day

[Stephen Maturin]

In 2018, Jena Griswold became the first Democrat to win a Colorado Secretary of State election since 1958. She's running for reelection here in 2022.

A whackjob named Tina Peters, the Mesa County Clerk and Recorder, is running for the Republican nomination. The loony stop-the-steal Trumpy antics of Peters and one of her loony, Trumpy employees has now resulted in a 13-count criminal indictment, courtesy of a Mesa County grand jury.

The indictment p. much secures Peters' place in the driver's seat of the GQP clown car for the SoS nomination.

Originally Posted by slimshady2357

I mean, I'd probably still rather have the raining shit dude than Boebert... but he also seems rat-brained crazy. That was fucking insane.

The way that congressional district got reconfigured p. much ensures GOP dominance for the next decade. As a result, we're expecting zero to exceptionally few serious Democratic candidates. Sloebert has two GOP primary challengers, but they're likely to divide the in-party opposition (to the extent it exists) and thereby assure Sloebert's reelection.

[Stephen Maturin]

In which the City and County of Denver shows once again that the most efficient use of taxpayer funds is paying massive judgments to people injured by the violence of out-of-control pigs.

[Stephen Maturin]

Don't make any plans for April 5, you guys, cuz your presence is needed in downtown Denver.

I could never improve on the title of this blog post:

Ready To Get Red Pillowed, Colorado? - Colorado Pols

[Stephen Maturin]

The Colorado GOP has indeed completely rounded the bed. The state party as it once was, is no more. Its body has been taken from the shadow of far night. It has been released from all darkness and pain. (Gratuitous Alien 3 funeral speech reference itt.)

The Colorado Republicans had their state assembly over the weekend. As part of this rather arcane process, county parties elect delegates to the state assembly, and the state delegates vote on Republican candidates for statewide office. Generally speaking, any candidate who receives at least 30% of the delegate votes at the state assembly gets a spot on the ballot for the May primary election, with the top vote-getter receiving top billing.

So here's how it went:

Colorado GOP nominates election deniers to 2022 primary ballot - Axios Denver

False claims about 2020 election front and center as Tina Peters clinches spot in GOP secretary of state race

Far-right conspiracy theorists triumphant at Republican state assembly - Colorado Newsline

Mesa County Clerk and Recorder Tina Peters, who's currently under indictment for election-related crimes, got a substantial majority of the votes for the GOP Secretary of State nominee.

Heidi Ganahl, the only member of the current crop of Republicans who's actually won a statewide election, is mounting a campaign for governor. She was viewed as the favorite despite the epic amount of buffoonery on display since the early days of the campaign. However, she finished a close second (32.6%) at the state assembly. The winner was Greg Lopez, who slipped into the top spot (34.3%) when he announced to the delegates that he would pardon Tina Peters if elected governor.

Danielle Neuschwanger of "our gay governor is really a woman-beating closet het" fame got only 27% of the vote for governor, thus failing to qualify for a spot on the primary ballot, but refuses to concede. She's pretty sure there was "election fraud" afoot. She's vowed to look into the issue and make sure that GOP state party chair Kristy Burton Brown does prison time if she had anything to do with the "fraud."

Bugfuck trumpanzee stop-the-steal enthusiast Loren "Ron" Hanks ran away with the vote for U.S. Senate nominee. Old school Republicans had been telling anyone who would listen that Hanks wasn't a serious candidate. Oops.

But my favorite outcome of all happened re: the race for Attorney General nominee. It wasn't supposed to be a "race" at all. John Kellner, the district attorney in a wingnut county to the south of us, was thought to have no competition. However, some knucklehead named Stanley Thorne announced that he wanted the nomination. Given the opportunity to address the assembly, he argued that Kellner was the wrong guy for the job because he was not doing enough to support . . . you guessed it, Tina Peters.

Despite not being licensed to practice law in Colorado, Thorne got 42 percent of the vote. That would ordinarily be enough to force a primary, but in addition to his lack of a Colorado law license it later came to light that Thorne is not registered as a Republican. That sin got his votes invalidated.

Still, it is breathtakingly hilarious that 42% of these diehard Lolorado GOP bozos opted for "some random knob no one ever heard of" instead of an experienced DA who's perceived as insufficiently supportive of an election criminal.

[specious_reasons]

This Colorado GOP candidate for Governor has a plan to turn those GOP losses around:

GOP governor candidate: Colorado should have electoral system | 9news.com

[Stephen Maturin]

Danielle Neuschwanger () has apparently given up on exposing the Colorado GOP's leadership as a bunch of vote-stealing scumbags and accepted an offer to run for governor in November as the candidate of the American Constitution Party.

show spoiler

In addition to wanting an electoral college for state offices and his promise to pardon election criminal Tina Peters "when" he's elected governor, that Lopez dude once punched out his pregnant spouse. His defense is that it's all good because the cops took both of them to jail, not just him.

Ordinarily you'd think there's not enough turd polish on planet to make such a legendarily awful candidate viable. Trouble is, evil slapdicks like Lopez are exactly what the GOP wants nowadays.

[JoeP]

Colorado to no longer tax feminine hygiene products, diapers

There is enlightenment in the US?

[Stephen Maturin]

Sales taxes are regressive, but they're a little less onerous here since the state sales tax doesn't apply to food purchased for human consumption at home.

The new bill eliminating state sales tax on diapers and feminine hygiene products passed with big bipartisan majorities in both houses of the state legislature, but it looks like the "no" voters were all wingnuts. Can't imagine what was going on in their little wingnut minds, and I really don't want to know.

A couple of city councils - Denver's and Aurora's - have followed suit and eliminated their local sales taxes on the same products.

[Stephen Maturin]

In other feel-good lolorado news, a proposed ballot initiative that would have rendered abortion illegal in most instances has gone to be with Jesus for want of enough signatures. The Reproductive Health Equity Act, passed by our Democratic state legislature and signed by our Democratic governor, remains the law in our state.

[Stephen Maturin]

State Sen. Kevin Priola (R) is now state Sen. Kevin Priola (D), having concluded that "I cannot continue to be a part of a political party that is okay with a violent attempt to overturn a free and fair election and continues to peddle claims that the 2020 election was stolen." In addition to election denying and insurrection, Priola cited GOP denial of man-made climate change as a factor in his decision.

Here is a "welcome aboard" message from the Governor. The wingnuts have wasted no time in demanding a recall vote.

[Kamilah Hauptmann]

Some ideological questions for Priola:

Does the female body have ways to shut down legitimate rapes?
If the President does it, is it still illegal?
Are there ways to reduce the number of nuclear weapons other than using them?
Are Republican gays more macho that Democrat straights?
Is it the Democratic Party or the Democrat Party?
Was John McCain a war hero because he was captured?
Is being a leader and a reader mutually exclusive?
Is defending marriage on the same level as homeland security?
Is feminism a socialist, anti-family, political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism, and become lesbians?

Roll your own: TOP 25 STUPID REPUBLICAN QUOTES (of 61) | A-Z Quotes

[Stephen Maturin]

Originally Posted by Stephen Maturin

In 2018, Jena Griswold became the first Democrat to win a Colorado Secretary of State election since 1958. She's running for reelection here in 2022.

Welp, the Democratic interlude in that particular office was nice while it lasted. JFC.

[LarsMac]

Originally Posted by Stephen Maturin

Welp, the Democratic interlude in that particular office was nice while it lasted. JFC.

OOPS!
That'll leave a mark.

[Kamilah Hauptmann]

Honest to Dog photo of Matlock out and about

[JoeP]

Matlock totally is a clown, though

[Stephen Maturin]

Mountain unicycling no clown show

False as a simple matter of fact, but a relatively harmless falsehood compared the the liberal () MSM's usual fare.

[Kamilah Hauptmann]

Originally Posted by Stephen Maturin

False as a simple matter of fact, but a relatively harmless falsehood compared the the liberal ((())) MSN's usual fare.

[Stephen Maturin]

Goddamn pear-hating Germans!

[fragment]

So many good pears juiced on... D-Day?