Funny little question on another forum

[mountain_hare]

To you Israel vs. Palestine posters, a little question posted by a chap on another forum.

http://messageboard.cinescape.com/ha...read.php?t=544

Here is the scenario.

An attack is made on a military manned checkpoint in England by IRA mercenaries with direct ties to many members of the new Irish government. The charter to these mercenaries by the head of the political party, whom is not personally elected, is the re-unification of Ireland and total destruction of Great Britain by any means necessary. In the attack two soldiers are killed and one is kidnapped. The new ruling political party of Ireland responds that they are really not capable of freeing the soldier even though they have direct communication with the soldier’s captors and are part of the same collective.

In addition the international community refuses to give foreign aid desperately needed by the Irish government due to the extreme views towards Britain held by the now dominant political party running Ireland. Britain’s standing policy is to not negotiate with those they view as terrorists.

You are the Prime Minister of Great Britain. You have command of all military, domestic, financial, and other response teams. How do you respond?

By golly, I wonder what scenario he is alluding to? I mean, does he think he's clever because he substitutes 'Israel' with 'Great Britain'.

I thought I'd be funny as well. Here's my response.

Good question.

For a start, I would start by deploying troops, tanks and artillery on the Irish mainland,. I would then start shelling towns suspected of sheltering mercanaries. Yes, I said suspected. No evidence required. *wink wink*. I'd also call air strikes to destroy the power generators, which would result in thousands of Irish citizens being left without power.

I'd then impose curfews and martial law on the Irish mainland while I abduct and imprison Irish civilians to use as bargaining chips, and ensure that humanitarian aid and access are restricted, so that my any excesses committed by my troops cannot be documented. This collective punishment will hopefully have the desired effect... the civilians will get tired of suffering, and turn over the mercanaries to me. And/or the mercenaries would be forced to capitulate and release the soldiers.
Or even better, the native Irish would resist. This would then provide further support to my claim that they are violent savages (how dare they resist a peaceful occupier! How dare they resist God's people, the Protestants!) and hence strength my justification to prolong my military presence and annex their land (which I would have done eventually anyway, of course. Why spend all that money on a war, if I get nothing out of it?). 'New Irish Britain'. Hmm, I like the sound of that! Jolly good.

Also, while IRA mercenaries languish in my jail, I would condemn the Irish extremists as terrorists for daring to take a soldier prisoner. This would not only reduce the public's opinion of the IRA merc's, I would also gain worldwide sympathy, and a free hand to treat those barbarians however I so choose.

Oh, and note that I said nothing about overthrowing the 'terrorist' government. Why would I do that?! I funded them in the first place, and they give me the perfect excuse to go annexing Irish land. If they didn't exist, I'd need to invent an Irish enemy anyway, to justify my imperialism and aggression again the Irish population in general.

Hmph, I thought my response was pretty witty.

Anyway, what do you chaps think about the question. How would you react in such a scenario?

[California Tanker]

There are some flaws with the analogy.

1) None of the Irish paramilitary groups advocate(d) the destruction of Great Britain. They were quite happy to settle for "Brits out of Northern Ireland" which is at least a more tolerable goal. As it is, the major ones appear to have settled for the concept of a 'home rule' compromise.

2) None of the Irish paramilitary groups had anything of a reputation of killing hostages. They'd shoot British troops where they stood (or blow up civilians on the street), but barring the Shergar case, I can't think of any incidents where those detained for any period were killed. (FWIW, the PIRA leadership ordered an end to abductions in the 1980s). Ergo, there is less cause for concern to precipitate an invasion.

3) The bit about the head of the political party not being elected is a bit confusing. Each party in Ireland elects a candidate to be Party Leader and run for Taoseach (Prime Minister). By law, only members of the Dail (Parliament) can become Taoseach. Therefore the leaders of all the parties are elected by the people. Once, just to become a TD (MP) and thus be eligible for party leader, and if Taoseach, indirectly by having his/her party receive more votes than any other.

4) Though Sinn Feinn is now starting to take a notable chunk of the Dail, this only happened after SF repudiated violence as a means to the end. The Irish government, even in the highly unlikely (at this time) case of a Sinn Feinn leadership, would retain control of a quite effective internal policing system capable of doing a better job of finding a missing British soldier than a British military operation would be liable to obtain.

5) Even at the height of the Troubles, the paramilitary organisations such as the PIRA did not exactly enjoy overwhelming support. Now, admittedly, there was the issue of the Arms Crisis of 1970 before anyone really had time to consider an official policy, wherein some members of the Irish government were accused of attempting to smuggle (without higher government authorisation) arms to the PIRA, but that was dealt with internally and was generally considered a bit of a bad move by all and sundry.

6) Great Britain, of which England is a component part, is a single island under the exclusive control of Her Majesty's government and its uniformed services. As soon as there's a kidnapping of a soldier in England, (As per the initial post), they just need to seal the points of entry, and have the RAF/RN patrol the waters in case the kidnappers try to make a break for it by private yacht/boat or aircraft. That way it's a purely domestic criminal affair, Ireland doesn't enter into it.

Best way to deal with that sort of silliness. Inject reality.

Or better yet, read "Dawn Rose" by Mike Lunnon-Wood: Ireland is invaded and occupied by Arabs, held hostage in exchange for the Israeli-occupied territories. It really is an absolutely atrocious book, though Mullingar practically getting nuked did kindof put a smile on my face.

NTM