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06-22-2010, 01:39 AM
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Admin of THIEVES and SLUGABEDS
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Unicorn Gets Porked
Those scamps at ThinkGeek have gone and gotten themselves into trouble with the National Pork Board. One of the products TG offered a couple of months ago apparently infringed on the Board's trademarked "The Other White Meat" slogan, you see, so an indignant 12-page cease-and-desist naturally ensued.
What product was it that engendered such stern reproof? Why, Canned Unicorn Meat, of course, an exclusive ThinkGeek April 1st offering.
Quote:
We'd like to publicly apologize to the NPB for the confusion over unicorn and pork--and for their awkward extended pause on the phone after we had explained our unicorn meat doesn't actually exist. From our press release [PDF]:
"It was never our intention to cause a national crisis and misguide American citizens regarding the differences between the pig and the unicorn," said Scott Kauffman, President and CEO of Geeknet. "In fact, ThinkGeek's canned unicorn meat is sparkly, a bit red, and not approved by any government entity."
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06-22-2010, 03:33 AM
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A Very Gentle Bort
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Bortlandia
Gender: Male
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Re: Unicorn Gets Porked
Wait, you mean they never really offered it?
Fuck them. Bastards. All their cool shit is fake! IT'S ALL FAKE!
__________________
\V/_ I COVLD TEACh YOV BVT I MVST LEVY A FEE
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06-22-2010, 03:38 AM
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Member
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Join Date: May 2010
Location: were I am at the time
Gender: Female
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Re: Unicorn Gets Porked
What gets me is someone thought they could actually eat it
__________________
Live for today and not tomorrow
Live for the Now and whats here
Stop living for what maybe or what may never come
Live for the day already here
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06-22-2010, 03:48 AM
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I read some of your foolish scree, then just skimmed the rest.
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Bay Area
Gender: Male
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Re: Unicorn Gets Porked
Quote:
Originally Posted by BrotherMan
Wait, you mean they never really offered it?
Fuck them. Bastards. All their cool shit is fake! IT'S ALL FAKE!
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If you try to order it it will send you to a page where you can request it to be real.
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06-22-2010, 03:51 AM
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Admin of THIEVES and SLUGABEDS
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Re: Unicorn Gets Porked
Quote:
Originally Posted by teasasue
What gets me is someone thought they could actually eat it
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Ya rly. Everyone knows unicorn meat is utterly inedible. 
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06-22-2010, 04:00 AM
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liar in wolf's clothing
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Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Frequently about
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Re: Unicorn Gets Porked
The National Pork Board is just looking out for America. Remember that one time when Tom Cruise was all "HEY DON'T TOUCH UNICORN" and Mia Sara was all "Whuteva" and she touched the unicorn and fucked everything up, and then Tim Curry got stabbed? Do you want that to happen again? Do you think our country needs that right now? Answer me damn you.
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06-22-2010, 04:01 AM
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Dogehlaugher -Scrutari
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Northwest
Gender: Female
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Re: Unicorn Gets Porked
Uh, no?
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06-22-2010, 04:42 AM
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A Very Gentle Bort
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Bortlandia
Gender: Male
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Re: Unicorn Gets Porked
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ari
If you try to order it it will send you to a page where you can request it to be real.
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Fair enough, but unicorn meat isn't nearly as awesome as a tauntaun sleeping bag.
__________________
\V/_ I COVLD TEACh YOV BVT I MVST LEVY A FEE
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06-22-2010, 04:50 AM
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The King of America
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Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: The Devil's Kilometer
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Re: Unicorn Gets Porked
Fucking Fag and Bag.
__________________
Holy shit I need a federal grant to tag disaffected atheists and track them as they migrate around the net.
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06-22-2010, 08:29 AM
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Dark Lord, on the Dark Throne
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Re: Unicorn Gets Porked
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChuckF
and then Tim Curry got stabbed? Do you want that to happen again?
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Is that a trick question?
__________________
In the land of Mordor, where the shadows lie...
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06-23-2010, 09:49 PM
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A fellow sophisticate
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Cowtown, Kansas
Gender: Male
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Re: Unicorn Gets Porked
Quote:
Originally Posted by teasasue
What gets me is someone thought they could actually eat it
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Unicorn meat is sugar-free, fat-free, and calorie-free, good for all diets, kosher, halal or even vegan.
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